I realize that my criticism of EA's business practices may come across as overzealous at times, but even the most dedicated of the publisher's defenders can't possibly stick up for this video -- perhaps the greatest crime Electronic Arts has ever committed. 

As spotted by VG247, some Christmas carolers sing "Jingle Bells" but with the lyrics hilaaaaaariously replaced by gamer slang. Slang that is used with no context and hasn't even been vaguely retooled to sound like it could be Christmassy. How the Hell do you get "You're Nothing But A Punk" from "Jingle Bells" anyway? In any case, I think I didn't even make it past the minute mark without needing to cough up blood.

EA, why did you have to ruin Christmas as well?

Legacy Comments (will be imported soon)

flintmech

This is the Spike VGAs of Christmas carols.

Tara Long

This is legitimately fear-inducing.

Clowbog Beborp

EA, what you've just uploaded to Youtube is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever seen. At no point in your rambling, incoherent video were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone on the internet is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul.

Jack8274

Jesus this is so fucking bad... It makes me feel embarrassed to share the planet with these people.

Voxeril

Kotick is laughing it up

Handy

I pulled a face muscle because I cringing too hard...

Cutie Honey

Couldn't they TRY to make lyrics that rhyme?

Handy

It’s the songs fault I can’t do a good grammar no more.

DreamingDarklyRobin

Does anyone else smell sulfur right now?

God Complex

36 seconds. thats all i could manage. 36 seconds

toadie

It burrns! My Ears, WHY EA? WHY?

CyricZ

Santa and the Ice Cream Bunny is more coherent and worthwhile.

Tristrix

I really wanted to like this just out of spite, so I could call Jim a hater again... but goddamn, he's right. This really is unwatchable.

Sandman666

EA why are you uploading shit to youtube when you should be focusing on SWTORS "stable launch", oh wait it was released yesterday? oh wait a sizeable group of people who paid for the game are missing their product codes and whatnot! EA I don't have a degree but I could manage your customer service a whole lot better than this.

AklashPahk

God, I couldn't watch it to the end. And I dare you.

LuizPSC

I need some lryics in this video, i don´t understrand nothing in this probaly evil and full of sins video.

locotony

EA has reached actvision levels, again.

Piotr Pawe Kowalczyk

I'd wish I took an arrow to the knee instead of having to listen to this... but it's too late. Brain damage is done.

Corbanski

This was retarted and @cowboy I see what you did there

Corbanski

Woops @clowbog. I can't read some times

Gorescream

the aids is strong in this one

Popliteal

Welp, my Christmas is ruined.

Fuck you EA, and your little Steam clone too.

AklashPahk

@Wakatashi, you're a hero. Or not.

Ziggy played whatever

...The fuck?

Teta

Thank god I have trouble understanding English.

Chris Carter

JINGLE BELLS IS FREE TO PLAY BUT DECK THE HALLS REQUIRES A SUBSCRIPTION LOL HAPPY HOLIDAYS SUCKERS

Elsa

... what flintmech said.

imDraxx

FUCKING EA!! God damn it someone put this company to death for the love of god. EA is just making both gamers and the industry look like shit (can't say much though to gamers who play 'competitive FPS games').

/ClusterRage

jimboxxx

If not for MassEffect 3 and its tight mp I would be boyocoting EA too with my boy Jim here

Noir

My Wonderland is shattered.

jimboxxx

BUT seriosly MW3 and ME3 will be last games ill buy from EA then Halo Anniversary will be enough for rest of 2012

SephirothX

Allen Lobo

@Jimboxxx You do realize MW3 is Activision?

janoDX

@jimboxxx

"BUT seriosly MW3 and ME3 will be last games ill buy from EA"
"BUT seriosly MW3... last games ill buy from EA"
"seriosly MW3... games from EA"
"MW3... EA"

ARE YOU SERIOUS BRO?...

jimboxxx

and see haters hating on competitive FPS gamers still SAD

SephirothX

and for jimboxxx

Turbofail

Am I the only one who can barely understand what they are saying?

Morty

Well, there's a quote from Shadows of the Damned, so there's one redeeming feature.

Morty

Hahahaha @Clowbog
I love that line.

psycho terror2

i want to die. NO wait, i want them to die. JUST MAKE IT STOP!!

either way can someone just please make sure this never happens again.

janoDX

@jimboxxx

Do you realize what did you did?... "Oh they are hating competitive FPS gamers!."

Guess what...

I'm a competitive FPS and Fighting Gamer. And you are a try hard noob. Shut up.

Sir Tobbii

@Noir
The only videogame reference I managed to understand, and the fact that it was there made me saaaaad.

jimboxxx

@ janoDX

what did I DID ?

MrFloppyknickers

It's like old Mr. Potter from its a wonderful life time travelled to now, took over a gaming company and decided try to sly fuck everyone over with shitty pricing on games, and even shittier service on that "world wide road thing" and is now trying to make it seem like he's one of the masses by "getting down" with his customers.

Where's jimmy stuart when you need him?

Anti jimmyx

...

You are probably not the best representative for correcting spelling, grammar, or syntax errors

Noaxzl

And I used to think that Activision was the biggest dick publisher in NA. I hope EA's happy with all the coal they'll get this year.

Rabite

Noaxzl: Can't give them too much coal or they'll craft it into gifts.

CaptainHowdy

The people singing it looks confuse.

Talía

No.

tekbunny

There is so much win going on in this thread it's insane.