Electronic Arts will be bringing a game based on the popular For Dummies self-help books to the Nintendo DS. Poker For Dummies is the first in a series and is already on PC, but the first DS venture will be ... amazingly ... Travel Games For Dummies. 

If you're so utterly stupid that you need a tutorial to learn how to use a frigging crossword, you shouldn't have been able to master breathing in and out, but nevertheless, Travel Games For Dummies will provide such a tutorial, as well as lessons in Sudoku and Solitaire, a game I learned the basics of when I was six years old. 

"For Dummies offers an entirely fresh take on the world's most popular games," said Robert Nashak, VP of EA Casual Studios. "By teaming up with the most recognized name in the area of self-improvement, we can provide not only fun games, but also everything it takes to learn and master them."

I wish I was dead.