Today I played DOOM 3: BFG Edition and it was so intensely scary that I did an actual poo in my underpants. Fortunately, it was just a small and hard one, so I don't think anybody noticed. I just slyly shook it out of my leg next to some other jerk and let Bethesda deal with it.
The thing about the poo was how spherical it was. We're talking an almost perfect globe. At one point, Pete Hines kicked the poo and it rolled like a marble. I did not see it again after that.
I did, however, enjoy DOOM 3: BFG Edition.
With a game as functionally aged as DOOM 3, there isn't much point in covering the gameplay, though I can say that the game holds up as it ever did (which makes sense, considering I was happily playing the game on Steam a few months ago). The atmosphere and the shameless jump scares still work together well. Even stood in a brightly lit room, the headphones were delivering enough horrific shrieks to keep me frantic.
Being able to play the game in 3D was a nice little touch, but as with all things 3D, it's not something I'd go out of my way to experience. If you're already wired for it, then feel free to crank it up, as it definitely works solidly. I played the console version, which looked good in HD, but it has to be said that the game already looks good in HD on a PC. The visuals upgrades aren't going to be dramatic to any computer user who recently played it, but hey, console players aren't going to be too bothered.
One thing to appreciate is the conveniently reworked controls. As Bethesda announced, one no longer needs to hold a torch in lieu of a weapon, allowing one to fire at enemies and see them as the same time. While there's a case to be made for its ability to heighten tension, I found the old torch mechanic more annoying than intimidating. I appreciate that it's easier to navigate the dark rooms, and I found that it didn't take away from the scares at all, which had always focused more on sound and enemies that leap out from corners and demonic spawn points.
Speaking as a fan of the original version, I am looking forward to the BFG Edition. It looks like it'll be the definitive version of the title, especially with the improvements and the extra content, so you can count me in. More respect for DOOM 3 is always welcome as far I'm concerned.
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5:00 PM on 03.19.2015