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Home Dynasty Warriors updates

Dirty Warriors: Musou porno

9:25 AM on 01.21.2008, Jim Sterling 39 comments

Dirty Warriors: Musou porno  photo
     Dynasty Warriors

My love of sword-swinging Dynasty Warriors may indeed be very strong, but I can't help wondering if purchasing Cosplay Musou, a porno in which young Asian girls wear DW costumes and get stabbed with swords of a fleshier persuasion, might cross the line into creepy territory.

Cosplay Musou stars Aika Miyazaki, Ai Katsuki, Rika Nagasawa and Tomoka Nozawa, all of them ready for you to go medieval on their arses. Thinking about it, this makes perfect sense, as instead of hammering the A button, as in all DW games, we cut out the middle man and just go straight to the hammering. I can't believe that's the best innuendo I can come up with.

So, is buying this taking my Dynasty Warriors love a bit too far? Should I now take the ultimate challenge and become a Dynasty Wanker? I could click this NSFW link here to purchase the sordid shame, or I could just be satisfied that buying Sima Yi toys from Ebay is obsession enough. I fear if I buy this, I'm one step closer to commiting murders in the park at night.

I'll be right back, just getting my credit card.

[Thanks Mr. Satsu. Seriously.]


Next page: More WHAAAAAAT? stories




Dale North's Avatar
Dale North at 01/21/2008 09:28
hawt.
Beaudman's Avatar
Beaudman at 01/21/2008 09:35
I don't see the harm in it.You should send a copy to Jack Thompson as well.
wardrox's Avatar
wardrox at 01/21/2008 09:42
Is that as hot as the Zelda pron?
Oni's Avatar
Oni at 01/21/2008 09:42
/me shrugs

Whatever blows your hair back.
Ethermay's Avatar
Ethermay at 01/21/2008 09:44
LMFAO. Absolutely hilarious post. Good times sir.
chief blaze's Avatar
chief blaze at 01/21/2008 10:08
boi-oi-oing
Sharpless's Avatar
Sharpless at 01/21/2008 10:12
Oh, just go and buy it, you sad man. Let the addiction overtake you. You know you want to.
Jim Sterling's Avatar
Jim Sterling at 01/21/2008 10:16
Sharpless: My other half said she'd kill me if I bought it. :-(

She said nothing, however, of giving the money to someone else ...
Tull's Avatar
Tull at 01/21/2008 10:18
Just tell her you're buying it for work purposes. You do write for a gaming site. Everyone knows pron and gaming are like PB and J.
kaneka's Avatar
kaneka at 01/21/2008 10:19
SHAAAA-WING! udiudidudiudi.
corneliuscack's Avatar
corneliuscack at 01/21/2008 10:28
so uh, is this reverse gangbang or what? :D
Krayven's Avatar
Krayven at 01/21/2008 10:38
A reenactment of the "It's Lu Bu! Lu Bu has come to destroy us!" scene porno style.. would be pretty awesome.
DannyBoy's Avatar
DannyBoy at 01/21/2008 10:47
Jim: You should try and get her to dress like Diao Chan for you then. Or Zhang He, if that's your thing...
JonDarkwood's Avatar
JonDarkwood at 01/21/2008 10:51
So Jim, what do you think of those action figures from yesterday now? Does it make them look less weird?
Arcanum's Avatar
Arcanum at 01/21/2008 10:52
So this is about one guy that has sex with thousands of generic japanese women?
Sharpless's Avatar
Sharpless at 01/21/2008 11:04
@Jim
Wardrox strikes me as someone who would be willing... if you can make him stop hating you with every fiber of his mohawk.
Jim Sterling's Avatar
Jim Sterling at 01/21/2008 11:08
We are of the same mind. I am going to force Wardrox to buy it and then give it to me.
HyrulianSpartan's Avatar
HyrulianSpartan at 01/21/2008 11:13
Jim...once you get this, we aren't gonna here from you for a while are we?
amalgamut00's Avatar
amalgamut00 at 01/21/2008 11:18
zelda porn?
Corak's Avatar
Corak at 01/21/2008 11:20
If your better half is giving you slack just have a friend get it for you and just pay him. Or just use your card and have it sent to his address, but if your chick gets your charge bills you probably can't do that. Porn is porn man, sometimes its dressed up differently but in the end its the same thing. And if you worry about it hurting the relationship...don't. Any good marriage is built on a solid foundation of lies.
Mister Disco's Avatar
Mister Disco at 01/21/2008 11:30
Sure, I'll buy it. I have a full musou bar just ready and waiting. >:)
Churchhills Dog's Avatar
Churchhills Dog at 01/21/2008 11:41
God I love the Japanese.
Neonie's Avatar
Neonie at 01/21/2008 11:43
I DID NOT try to find a torrent and fail.
BS3 Owner's Avatar
BS3 Owner at 01/21/2008 12:07
NO thanx...
nademagnet's Avatar
nademagnet at 01/21/2008 12:10
SHITTY MOVIE NIGHT! or... just rip it and send it to our emailz!
deiga-the-semivaliant's Avatar
deiga-the-semivaliant at 01/21/2008 12:30
Ugh, not very good looking girls = ugly pr0n.
MechaMonkey's Avatar
MechaMonkey at 01/21/2008 13:08
I'm determined to post this in every Dynasty Warriors-related post henceforth.

Big Z's Avatar
Big Z at 01/21/2008 13:16
@Wardrox - Zelda porn you say? Tell me more.
RoMeRtHeGaMe's Avatar
RoMeRtHeGaMe at 01/21/2008 13:27
Well since I'm at work right now, I won't be able to check the link, so I'll just have to wait till I get home.
Origim's Avatar
Origim at 01/21/2008 14:21
Don't do it Jim it will scar you for life. Oh wait, er it will scar you worse?
Samit Sarkar's Avatar
Samit Sarkar at 01/21/2008 15:11
I just want one of the guys in the movie to splooge and then say, “Fear the Tiger of Jiang Dong!”
Syn's Avatar
Syn at 01/21/2008 16:07
Doesn't look creepy to me...not in the least.
A few other descriptors come to mind, but creepy isn't one of 'em!
Aertyr's Avatar
Aertyr at 01/21/2008 16:25
WHERE IS THE BOOBIES
Cutie Honey's Avatar
Cutie Honey at 01/21/2008 18:24
Apparently, doujins need more exposure:

There are plenty of adult games, art, and hentai for Musou games.
EXTREMELY NOT SAFE FOR WORK, SEX WITH FEMALE LU XUN INVOVLED:
http://www.anonib.com/_genderbending/index.php?t=84
Necros's Avatar
Necros at 01/21/2008 22:42
I think you found a way to get me interested in Dynasty Warriors, Jim.
Fading Star's Avatar
Fading Star at 01/22/2008 10:53
Whatever makes you happy, Jim.
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