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Dirty Lara Croft gets clothes off, this is videogame news photo

It's a slow, post-holiday news day, and we seriously have little better to do than objectify women on a "professional" Web site for cheap clicks. At least we're up front about it, and talking of "up front," let us all now gaze upon the big wobbly mammos of Alison Carroll, the big-jugged tart who holds the honor of being the newest Lara model.

Popular British comic The Sun has all the filthy details, so hop on over if you're short of wanking material and have forgotten that there's free pornography all over the Internet. There is also a video interview as well, if you're one of those rare males that actually care about what a woman has to say.

Videogames!


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next 50 comments

55 comments | showing # 1 to 50

Holyetheline's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/02/2009 14:35
Holyetheline
oic
MrSadistic's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/02/2009 14:36
MrSadistic
BOOBS
Samit Sarkar's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/02/2009 14:36
Samit Sarkar
"Big-jugged tart"? Hardly. A push-up bra seems to be part of her Lara Croft attire, since without it, her chest looks ... well, rather pedestrian in comparison.

I'd still hit it, though.
Tyson The Tool's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/02/2009 14:36
Tyson The Tool
In other news, we have determined that Lord of the Rings: Conquest is absolutely awful.
Justice's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/02/2009 14:42
Justice
@Samit
Yeah she's really not got much under that top unfortunately.
Brad Nicholson's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/02/2009 14:44
Brad Nicholson
She's beautiful. I would like to sit down and share a cup of coffee with her.
Kif 's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/02/2009 14:44
Kif
When she's not in Lara-gear, she's just another Page 3 girl. No, worse than that, a Page 3 girl who doesn't even show her tits. Couldn't they have at least put her in the wetsuit or something?
Kif 's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/02/2009 14:46
Kif
That comment made me sound like a creepy video game playing pervert who only gets off from chicks as game characters, didn't it?

Fuck.
Tyson The Tool's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/02/2009 14:50
Tyson The Tool
@ Kif

You're right at home with us, man
Cough's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/02/2009 14:50
Cough
fapfapfbah, forget it.

I hope everyone in The Sun burns.

Someone must've made that joke before.
Fusiontr's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/02/2009 14:53
Fusiontr
Tits
EternalDeathSlayer's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/02/2009 14:54
EternalDeathSlayer
She is so boring looking, not to mention I also agree with Samit's earlier observation about her tits being average.

Then again, like Samit, I'd also hit it.
Spartan's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/02/2009 14:54
Spartan
I can see Bond, James Bond in her future - mark my words...
EternalDeathSlayer's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/02/2009 14:58
EternalDeathSlayer
Spartan: She's way too generic looking for that....
F Whipple's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/02/2009 15:03
F Whipple
@spartan

maybe in the pierce brosnan days when the only great one was the girl from braveheart
moshakirby's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/02/2009 15:05
moshakirby
Hahaha, you guys are talking like you'd even have the chance
RonBurgandy2010's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/02/2009 15:05
RonBurgandy2010
O.O
Hollie Bennett's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/02/2009 15:08
Hollie Bennett
Still I wouldn't mind looking like that lol.

From previous pictures they chose her to be the new Lara because shes a gymnast and can do all those weird poses that people want her to do, where previously those just chose really hot but totally useless women.

I still would though....
Half left's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/02/2009 15:13
Half left
Saying it like it is. I love it.
RAB's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/02/2009 15:26
RAB
THIS is why i visit destructoid first thing in the morning.
Phoenix Gamma's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/02/2009 15:43
Phoenix Gamma
You can never deposit too much into your spank bank.
Char Aznable's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/02/2009 15:44
Char Aznable
Yeah, I looked through the entire slideshow.
Spartan's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/02/2009 15:57
Spartan
Maybe so guys, but stranger things have happened in pop culture for a crosspollination fast buck.
Mr Wrighty 987's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/02/2009 15:59
Mr Wrighty 987
Meh i would say she isnt even a C cup! you need to be a DD or over to rider this train choo choo
Saint Demon's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/02/2009 16:09
Saint Demon
I would probably classify her as beautiful but shes severely lacking in the personality department. I wouldn't classify all models with that stereotype as I have known a few very interesting people, but overall I can't forsee an intelligent conversation with that person at least based off that interview. Also, they couldn't find a real model who could do gymnastics with breasts the size of houses, what a shame <insert sarcastic sigh here>.
Qraze's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/02/2009 16:19
Qraze
i'd give her the business.
Sloth's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/02/2009 16:28
Sloth
Is this the same Lara Croft model who inspired the giblet-talk on Podcastle a few months back? (#17-ish, I think).
Qraze's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/02/2009 16:31
Qraze
she didn't bare anything! i was expecting soft core porn and all i got was standard crap! not even one bent-over, back arched, head looking back shot, what a jip.

the chubby wasn't chubby at all after viewing that slideshow, it was just a chub.
Charlietime's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/02/2009 16:37
Charlietime
If she look like she knew how to hold a gun it might help, with the whole tomb raider visage.
ScreamingScarab's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/02/2009 16:40
ScreamingScarab
Jana Defi needs to be Lara Croft.

Or maybe they need to have a Jana Defi and Ewa Sonnet game.

Hello! Itagaki! Wake the eff up and make it! DOAXBV3!
GuitarAtomik's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/02/2009 16:49
GuitarAtomik
Jeeeeeeeeeesus.
Gavin's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/02/2009 16:54
Gavin
"big-jugged"?!?!?!? WTF

This chick has nothing of that nature...and she's not really fap material.

Meh-tastic.
BulletTrain's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/02/2009 16:57
BulletTrain
That saucy minx.

I'd raid her tombs.
Demtor's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/02/2009 17:00
Demtor
Wow, her tale of heroics was just amazing... lol! What the hell is she blabbering on about? Strike a pose, and shut the fuck up.
parrothead's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/02/2009 17:07
parrothead
She is hot, but it reminds me that I need to pick up Underworld. I
Corak's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/02/2009 17:09
Corak
Not bad, not great, but not bad, I chubed a little. Yea I went through the entire slideshow but skipped the video.
MisterMingo's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/02/2009 17:16
MisterMingo
She's pretty cute.

That's about all I have to say about this.
Bennyishere's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/02/2009 17:59
Bennyishere
They better bring Karima Adebibe back. I think I'll go fap to her instead right now.
YadGadge's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/02/2009 19:02
YadGadge
Wait.. there's pornography on the internet? WTF why didn't anyone tell me?!
Volomon's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/02/2009 20:29
Volomon
All I have to say is who cares about this real chick? I want to see virtual nudity!
BluDesign's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/02/2009 22:37
BluDesign
@volomon

Go here...

http://img.4chan.org/b/imgboard.html

Some virtual nudity should be along shortly. That train rolls through about every 35 seconds.
Midgetsnowman's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/02/2009 23:54
Midgetsnowman
..If you're going to 4chan for fap material, why even bother with /b/ when theres a whole category or 7 for porn and you're just as likely to see something horrifically scarring as humanly imaginable on /b/ as you are to see a naked bit?
nebones's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/03/2009 00:56
nebones
fap
Uniquenamehere's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/03/2009 02:08
Uniquenamehere
Jim this aint for wanking where are the tits where is the arse.
Im OK's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/03/2009 15:02
Im OK
oh noes she has only small to average sized tits she's not worth looking at bah humbug

(/sarcasm)
PrimetimeFool's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/03/2009 21:44
PrimetimeFool
Normally I'd agree with you friend, but this is Lara Croft we're talking about. How dare they insult us with normal breasts. Couldn't they at least have given her a PS1-era cone bra?
Sharpless's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/04/2009 06:07
Sharpless
I love it when sites disable the right-click menu, but it still works anyway. LOL.

Not that I right-clicked anything.
Timstuff's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/05/2009 12:12
Timstuff
Rowr! She looks a lot finer than her game counterpart, for sure.
Phalanxxx's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/07/2009 04:16
Phalanxxx
I dunno what it is, but huge jugs do nothing for me... I prefer them real >.>
But yeah... I think all the guys in this comment thread (perhaps not jim?) are "tits" men.
falinter's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/07/2009 14:21
falinter
Thats not even Laura Croft anymore. Its just a half naked chick.
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