The staff at Destructoid realizes that some of you may just have digested a meal, so we will spare you from posting the winner of the Heavenly Sword Redhead babe of death contest we ran last week. We challenged our readers to find the ugliest, most knocked-up woman possible that would be suitable for the kind of warfare that Nariko might undertake in the sequel... and we've had trouble sleeping since. If you're a brave soul, hit the comments to view the entries. The winner of the sweet letter opener pictured above goes to comment #89 by Aerox. Close seconds were 31, 2, and 71. The guy with the legitimate boobs and random body hair was certainly the most notable. You know, it's times like this when we must marvel at the knowledge made possible by the internet(s!).
I'd also like to announce that our PlayStation 3 contest drawing is tonight! Please make sure your ballots are accurately represented in our reconcile tally. We'll be spending the night
Last but not least, we'd like to thank everyone that downloaded our Bomberman character last week. We know it didn't go without a hitch -- there's a bug where you can play as Dtoid but saving the character is not possible unless you have the other pack installed. Needless to say a small patch is already in the works, no need to purchase anything additional. As soon as that's all working properly we'll let you know! It's a good thing we didn't release anything on the Wii (zing!).
First, a matter of business. Congratulations to Nimic, who won our Lair Reviewer's Guide after pointing out that the game's botched controls were the result of a dragon-proof lolcat. Special thanks to Volcannon, who pointed out that page seven is full of filler text. Just goes to show -- neither we nor 1UP reported that because, well, neither of us actually read it. But it was pretty, though!
Onwards to our next Sony press giveaway. Heavenly swag, isn't it? Sony sent us this pint-sized replica of the Heavenly Sword along with the game's press kit. As tempting as it is to keep it handy at the house to behead small animals, we are passing this rarity along to a dear reader. How does one win it? I'm looking for a SWF photo of the ugliest red-headed woman you can find. Her hair must be fiery red like Nariko's ... that's the only rule. CarrotTop submissions are appreciated, but not eligible for the grand prize. We will announce the winner along with our PS3 giveaway in October. So get posting! Use BBcode to display your photo entry in the comments below.
Oh, and look how time flies! We are also just seven hours away from my announcement about that ominous announcement at Destructoid on the 18th. The story goes up at midnight tonight. Oh, but what could it be?
Contests Official RulesNo Purchase Required to Enter or Win
1. Eligibility: Destructoid.com contests are usually provided by sponsors who, due to customs and shipping costs (yay budgets), often limit participation to individuals who are legal residents of the fifty (50) United States (unless otherwise stated) and are at least 12 years of age. We encourage our overseas friends to be super sneaky and make a friend in the United States who can receive your prize, and then you two figure out the customs/logistics. Be cautious about who you trust, obviously. Employees of destructoid.com, their advertising or promotion agencies, those involved in the production, development, implementation or handling of Contests, any agents acting for, or on behalf of the above entities, their respective parent companies, officers, directors, subsidiaries, affiliates, licensees, service providers, prize suppliers any other person or entity associated with the Contests (collectively “Contest Entities”) and/or the immediate family (spouse, parents, siblings and children) and household members (whether related or not) of each such employee, are *not* eligible and will be fired and publicly beaten if are caught participating. All U.S., federal, state and local and regulations apply.
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3. Entry Period: The start and end dates/times of each Contest (the “Entry Period”) will be posted on the applicable Contest site.
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5. Drawing: Unless otherwise specified in the contest details above, we will select the names of the potential winners in a random drawing of all eligible entries received during each Entry Period. The number of winners to be selected in a specific Contest will be posted on the applicable Contest site. The odds of being selected as a potential winner depend on the number of eligible entries received during the Entry Period. Potential winners will be contacted via email and will be asked to provide their full name, age and mailing address within a specified time period. If a potential winner does not respond within the timeframe stated in the notification email, we may select an alternate potential winner in his/her place at random from all entries received during the Entry Period. Limit one (1) prize per household per Contest.
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8. General Conditions: In the event that the operation, security, or administration of the Contest is impaired in any way for any reason, including, but not limited to fraud, virus, or other technical problem, the Sponsor may, in its sole discretion, either: (a) suspend the Contest to address the impairment and then resume the Contest in a manner that best conforms to the spirit of these Official Rules; or (b) award the prizes at random from among the eligible entries received up to the time of the impairment. The Sponsor reserves the right in its sole discretion to disqualify any individual it finds to be tampering with the entry process or the operation of the Contest or to be acting in violation of these Official Rules or in an unsportsmanlike or disruptive manner. Any attempt by any person to undermine the legitimate operation of the Contest may be a violation of criminal and civil law, and, should such an attempt be made, the Sponsor reserves the right to seek damages from any such person to the fullest extent permitted by law. The Sponsor’s failure to enforce any term of these Official Rules shall not constitute a waiver of that provision. In case of a dispute as to the owner of an entry, entry will be deemed to have been submitted by the authorized account holder of the screen name from which the entry is made. The authorized account holder is defined as the natural person who is assigned to an e-mail address by an Internet access provider, online service provider, or other organization responsible for assigning e-mail addresses for the domain associated with the submitted e-mail address.
9.Release and Limitations of Liability: By participating in the Contest, entrants agree to release and hold harmless the Contest Entities from and against any claim or cause of action arising out of participation in the Contest or receipt or use of any prize, including, but not limited to: (a) unauthorized human intervention in the Contest; (b) technical errors related to computers, servers, providers, or telephone or network lines; © printing errors; (d) lost, late, postage-due, misdirected, or undeliverable mail; (e) errors in the administration of the Contest or the processing of entries; or (f) injury or damage to persons or property which may be caused, directly or indirectly, in whole or in part, from entrant’s participation in the Contest or receipt of any prize. Entrant further agrees that in any cause of action, the Contest Entities’ liability will be limited to the cost of entering and participating in the Contest, and in no event shall the Contest Entities be liable for attorney’s fees. Entrant waives the right to claim any damages whatsoever, including, but not limited to, punitive, consequential, direct, or indirect damages.
10. Disputes: Except where prohibited, entrant agrees that any and all disputes, claims and causes of action arising out of, or connected with, the Contest or any prize awarded shall be resolved individually, without resort to any form of class action. All issues and questions concerning the construction, validity, interpretation and enforceability of these Official Rules, entrant’s rights and obligations, or the rights and obligations of the Sponsors in connection with the Contest, shall be governed by, and construed in accordance with, the laws of the Commonwealth of Virginia, without giving effect to any choice of law or conflict of law rules (whether of the Commonwealth of Virginia or any other jurisdiction), which would cause the application of the laws of any jurisdiction other than the Commonwealth of Virginia.
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Lastly, Destructoid has the right to kick your ass and take away your prize if you are a total chode, so be cool and don't kick any puppies on your way to victory. Have fun with our contests and be a good sport when you win or lose. Remember: First you get the power, then you get the money, then get the baby.
Contest: Win a PlayStation TV and an Xbox One controller courtesy of Titan One!
8:00 PM on 12.25.2014