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Contest!  Mail random crap to us, win a video game of your choice! photo

Destructoid's new office is kind of a hippie commune: A move inspired by four guys who started a comedy web site out of their spare bedroom by pooling their money instead of living in separate budget apartments. The Dtoid Bordello's current inhabitants include our new programmer James (cblog voting is coming!), Colette, Rey, and I. Oh, and this guy. It also beats taking unnecessary money out of the company to put a roof over our heads. (Ziff Davis, you taking notes?) Nevertheless, our living the dream quarters looks a little sparce. That's where you come in: Send us random crap!

Contest Rules & Prizes

Send us random crap to decorate the office! The stranger the better. Make us laugh. Make our visitors worry about us. Unlike that other mail-in contest we're judging both packaging and contents: use alternative materials to wrap your stuff. Surprise us. Pro tip: Visit a thrift shop for ideas. If we pick your package you'll win a game of your choice (must be a retail game available in stores now under $59.99, sorry - no Radiant Silvergun) on the Wii, PS3, 360, PC, DS, PSP, or PC -- shipped anywhere in the world. 

Every 16th day of the month we'll post photos of all received items and announce the winner, so be sure to check and see who won.  The contest never ends -- look for a new winner each month.  Bonus: The first person that sends us a package will win our signature vagina-destroying condoms.  Hit the jump for more details:

Do:

Send fan art, knitted things, retro shit, robots, steering wheels, inflatable biceps, fox masks, LEGOs, posters, drawings, transformers, severed GI Joe heads, Jack Thompson (why not?), carved wood, aluminum foil, ocarinas, bear skins, plastic dinosaurs, street signs, photos of you in jail from stealing street signs, photos of you playing ocarinas, papercraft, haikus, surf boards, compromising photos of your grandmother, you and your friends playing video games at a Narp framed and ready for hanging.  That would be awesome, actually. 

Don't:

Send us anything nice, rare, or expensive.  That defeats the point.  We literally want random crap. Don't actually send us a literal bag of crap. No poo, please! Don't be creepy, bro. Don't send us a bag of sperm and roaches. No bodily fluids, needles, a box full of aids, insects, soiled clothing, food, children, salad dressing, tires, bowling accessories, czech pornography from the 60's (wait, that's actually fine), God's  creatures (unless professionally taxidermied), bombs, mysterious white powder, or anything uncool with the post office or experienced cougar women. Don't send a zip lock with a packet of mayonaise, a slice of bologna, and a spork. Do send it to your zealously bitchy bipolar bagel-selling activities director without explanation and be there when she goes to check her inbox. Film it and send us that.

Address your entries to:

DESTRUCTOID: WTF IS THIS SHIT?
3301 NE 1ST AVE, PH 17
MIAMI, FL 33137

Thanks and good luck! Also, PR people, plz update your address books. We moved.

 

 






Contests Official Rules



No Purchase Required to Enter or Win

1. Eligibility: Destructoid.com contests are usually provided by sponsors who, due to customs and shipping costs (yay budgets), often limit participation to individuals who are legal residents of the fifty (50) United States (unless otherwise stated) and are 12 years of age. We encourage our overseas friends to be super sneaky and make a friend in the United States who can receive your prize, and then you two figure out the customs/logistics. Be cautious about who you trust, obviously. Employees of destructoid.com, their advertising or promotion agencies, those involved in the production, development, implementation or handling of Contests, any agents acting for, or on behalf of the above entities, their respective parent companies, officers, directors, subsidiaries, affiliates, licensees, service providers, prize suppliers any other person or entity associated with the Contests (collectively “Contest Entities”) and/or the immediate family (spouse, parents, siblings and children) and household members (whether related or not) of each such employee, are *not* eligible and will be fired and publicly beaten if are caught participating. All U.S., federal, state and local and regulations apply.

2. Agreement to Official Rules: Participation in the Contest constitutes entrant’s full and unconditional agreement to and acceptance of these Official Rules and the decisions of the Sponsor, which are final and binding. Winning a prize is contingent upon fulfilling all requirements set forth herein.

3. Entry Period: The start and end dates/times of each Contest (the “Entry Period”) will be posted on the applicable Contest site.

4. Entry: To enter a Contest, follow the instructions on the Contest site. Submission will result in one (1) entry. The number of times you can enter the Contest will be posted on the applicable Contest site. The use of any agencies or automated software to submit entries will void all entries submitted by that person.

5. Drawing: At the conclusion of the Entry Period, we will select the names of the potential winners in a random drawing of all eligible entries received during each Entry Period. The number of winners to be selected in a specific Contest will be posted on the applicable Contest site. The odds of being selected as a potential winner depend on the number of eligible entries received during the Entry Period. Potential winners will be contacted via email and will be asked to provide their full name, age and mailing address within a specified time period. If a potential winner does not respond within the timeframe stated in the notification email, we may select an alternate potential winner in his/her place at random from all entries received during the Entry Period. Limit one (1) prize per household per Contest.

6. Requirements of the Potential Winners: Winners will be notified by the e-mail address associated with their account on destructoid.com.com and/or receive a Private Message on destructoid.com.com or through a Twitter Direct Message/Facebook message. Winners have five (5) days from the original message alerting them of their winnings to respond and claim their prize. If no winner comes forward within five business days, the prize will be forfeited and raffled again where Destructoid's hardcore fans are most active (forums/community blogs/facebook group).

7. Prize(s): The prize(s) (including each prize’s approximate retail value) available to be won in a specific Contest will be posted on the Contest site. No cash or other substitution may be made, except by the Sponsor, who reserves the right to substitute a prize with another prize of equal or greater value if the prize is not available for any reason as determined by the Sponsor in its sole discretion. The winners are responsible for any taxes and fees associated with receipt or use of a prize. Prizes will be mailed between 1 to 45 business days after winners have replied with their required info.

8. General Conditions: In the event that the operation, security, or administration of the Contest is impaired in any way for any reason, including, but not limited to fraud, virus, or other technical problem, the Sponsor may, in its sole discretion, either: (a) suspend the Contest to address the impairment and then resume the Contest in a manner that best conforms to the spirit of these Official Rules; or (b) award the prizes at random from among the eligible entries received up to the time of the impairment. The Sponsor reserves the right in its sole discretion to disqualify any individual it finds to be tampering with the entry process or the operation of the Contest or to be acting in violation of these Official Rules or in an unsportsmanlike or disruptive manner. Any attempt by any person to undermine the legitimate operation of the Contest may be a violation of criminal and civil law, and, should such an attempt be made, the Sponsor reserves the right to seek damages from any such person to the fullest extent permitted by law. The Sponsor’s failure to enforce any term of these Official Rules shall not constitute a waiver of that provision. In case of a dispute as to the owner of an entry, entry will be deemed to have been submitted by the authorized account holder of the screen name from which the entry is made. The authorized account holder is defined as the natural person who is assigned to an e-mail address by an Internet access provider, online service provider, or other organization responsible for assigning e-mail addresses for the domain associated with the submitted e-mail address.

9.Release and Limitations of Liability: By participating in the Contest, entrants agree to release and hold harmless the Contest Entities from and against any claim or cause of action arising out of participation in the Contest or receipt or use of any prize, including, but not limited to: (a) unauthorized human intervention in the Contest; (b) technical errors related to computers, servers, providers, or telephone or network lines; (c) printing errors; (d) lost, late, postage-due, misdirected, or undeliverable mail; (e) errors in the administration of the Contest or the processing of entries; or (f) injury or damage to persons or property which may be caused, directly or indirectly, in whole or in part, from entrant’s participation in the Contest or receipt of any prize. Entrant further agrees that in any cause of action, the Contest Entities’ liability will be limited to the cost of entering and participating in the Contest, and in no event shall the Contest Entities be liable for attorney’s fees. Entrant waives the right to claim any damages whatsoever, including, but not limited to, punitive, consequential, direct, or indirect damages.

10. Disputes: Except where prohibited, entrant agrees that any and all disputes, claims and causes of action arising out of, or connected with, the Contest or any prize awarded shall be resolved individually, without resort to any form of class action. All issues and questions concerning the construction, validity, interpretation and enforceability of these Official Rules, entrant’s rights and obligations, or the rights and obligations of the Sponsors in connection with the Contest, shall be governed by, and construed in accordance with, the laws of the Commonwealth of Virginia, without giving effect to any choice of law or conflict of law rules (whether of the Commonwealth of Virginia or any other jurisdiction), which would cause the application of the laws of any jurisdiction other than the Commonwealth of Virginia.

11. Contest Results: To enter the contest without needing to buy/sell anything or request a written copy of the name of the winners, send a self-addressed stamped envelope (stating the specific Contest you are requesting the winners for) to destructoid.com Contest Winners 260 King Street Suite 883, San Francisco California 94107. We run many contests, so please be specific in what you are requesting. Winner requests must be received within thirty (30) days from the end date of the applicable contest (they're always posted on our site though). Winners are usually posted the day following the contest on our contest section.

Lastly, Destructoid has the right to kick your ass and take away your prize if you are a total dickhead, so be cool and don't kick any puppies on your way to victory. Have fun with our contests and be a good sport when you win or lose. Remember: First you get the power, then you get the money, then get the baby.

 




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Yanier "Niero" Gonzalez is Destructoid's founder and guy-in-the-helmet.After 2,000+ stories posted and years of starting trouble on the front page he's now busy behind the scenes building the future of Destructoid. His story is our motto: "Living The Dream".

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71 comments | showing # 1 to 50
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next 50 comments

A New Challenger's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/10/2009 01:12
A New Challenger
What a great way to get "free" stuff for the office!

Someone is going to request Radiant Silvergun or All Night Nippon Super Mario Bros. or F-Zero AX or Chase The Chuckwagon or Star Fox 2 or California Raisins or Nintendo World Championship or....
Niero's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/10/2009 01:19
Niero
I hope not, that would defeat the point. Nobody should spend more than the cost of a cheeseburger. I want people spending a dollar on something tacky and terrible, funny photos, or found objects that make no sense.
Paul Soth's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/10/2009 01:25
Paul Soth
Someone will send in real crap. Mark my words.
mistic's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/10/2009 01:25
mistic
Wohah fucking brilliant contest!

There'll be a package coming from Europe as soon as I get home :-)
Barcode's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/10/2009 01:29
Barcode
Oh this is going to be so much FUN!
Ballistic's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/10/2009 01:33
Ballistic
Yeah, I gotta say, the "any game on any system" is really tantalizing to me. But what if I asked for say, Marvel Versus Capcom 2, or Steel Battalion with ridiculous mech controller? I guess there's a limit if it's got some ridiculous peripheral that you have to use with it, or if there's only got 30 copies left of it.
vApathyv's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/10/2009 01:35
vApathyv
Could I send you my dog? She's quite a lovely pit bull, and she's guaranteed to lick the shit out of you during Rock Band sessions.
A New Challenger's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/10/2009 01:36
A New Challenger
@Niero:

I meant the winner would choose one of those games as their delicious prize... am I missing something?

As for cheap random crap, this is the perfect excuse for me to clean my room. I have TONS of random crap and no space for it.

Also, shit, I know something that would've been PERFECT if I'd picked it up when I saw it a couple years ago.
CWal37's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/10/2009 01:37
CWal37
Hmmm this requires some actual thought.
BluDesign's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/10/2009 01:37
BluDesign
Finally, a chance for me to pick up a copy of Chu Chu Rocket on the Dreamcast. Consider something shipped to you, via me, very soon.
vApathyv's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/10/2009 01:47
vApathyv
I actually just realized that, aside from some street signs plastered to my wall and a weird-ass Japanese wind-up Sumo wrestling toy I don't really have anything that could possibly be considered unique. My room is plastered with discarded posters and standees from work, plus the odd capsule toy or life-sized plush panda.

...The dog offer still stands, mind you. >_>
Vongore's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/10/2009 02:06
Vongore
Can i send stuff even if i don't live on the US? (i'll pay the shipment of the package and the game if i win. Unless you want to pay the 3$ that costs sending a game)
Vongore's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/10/2009 02:09
Vongore
Can i send stuff even if i don't live on the US? (i'll pay the shipment of the package and the game if i win. Unless you want to pay the 3$ that costs sending a game)
Vongore's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/10/2009 02:10
Vongore
oh crap, sorry about the double post
TheCleaningGuy's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/10/2009 02:13
TheCleaningGuy
Well, Looks like I might have to send something in! Hmmm...
-PL-'s Avatar - Comment posted on 02/10/2009 02:14
-PL-
If I win, can I get Panzer Dragoon Saga for Saturn? Or maybe Steel Batallion with the controller. You guys ain't getting off easy.
Trowble's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/10/2009 02:25
Trowble
I know exactly wait to mail in, now only if I can find it!
Trowble's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/10/2009 02:26
Trowble
er... wait = what*

Don't know how that came about.
Vitamin Awesome's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/10/2009 02:27
Vitamin Awesome
I'm a cheap ass, so if I ever won, I'd probably ask for a used copy of prey of something.
whormongr's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/10/2009 02:58
whormongr
somewhere around here I have some random shit- I know I have a bunch of random stuff you guys won't have, maybe I'll do a painting though.....
Aziel13's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/10/2009 03:29
Aziel13
oh man what a world time to find random crap and nick nacks
coolnnd's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/10/2009 03:31
coolnnd
Maybe you are struggling in playing runescape for runescape gold http://www.runescape2gold.net/. Or you are being called noobiein runescape. Are you looking for unofficial runescape cheats or runescape guides in order to get runescape money faster? Have you ever got hacked due to using runescape hacks or runescape bots autominers? Can you make millions of runescape money in short of time? Even if you know how to farm runescape money, you have to prepare for enough runescape gp first to buy runescape gold, to level upyour runescape characters.
vexed alex's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/10/2009 03:40
vexed alex
Can I send you guys a picture of me naked as a baby?
Clance's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/10/2009 03:45
Clance
I'm sending myself, wrapped in Vaseline and leaves.
Takeshi's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/10/2009 03:48
Takeshi
Uh oh! Random shit from The Netherlands incoming!!! I've got a perfect idea...*

This is the best contest ever!

*: No, no, no. Not weed, hash or hookers...
kingnothing997's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/10/2009 03:55
kingnothing997
Fucking IN.
Takeshi's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/10/2009 04:05
Takeshi
Also, that cat looks cute! What's it's name? Can you post some pics of the office in it's current state? I'm curious how it looks right now.
Clance's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/10/2009 04:13
Clance
Hark at you and your new avatar, Takeshi!

Hey, the one-eyed, sack-wearing fucker with the chainsaw in Resi 5 demo.... Is that your guy?
Takeshi's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/10/2009 04:25
Takeshi
It's my old avatar wearing a Helghast gas-mask! It has nothing to do with RE5.
Clance's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/10/2009 04:34
Clance
No, no, the one on your banner really reminds me of the thing in Resi 5, peering out with one eye under a sack.... :os

Love the new one dude.

Can't wait for that fucking game!
Half left's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/10/2009 04:46
Half left
It takes about 3 Months and ungodly amounts of money to post anything from England to America. Wont waste my time.
Nicojay2's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/10/2009 05:43
Nicojay2
Hmmm I too am in the uk and feel unsure about spending the necessary monies to send you some quintessential british chintz or other such crap. However if the prize games worth is substantial enough, for instance at the moment I am eyeing up Strider 2 on the PS but don't like the prices.
Wow, that made it sound as if I would be doing you a favour. Clarification on the prizes worth would be nice.
atastysammich's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/10/2009 05:56
atastysammich
I can't wait for the announcement of the condoms' winner, when they reply "FIRST!!" (Does anyone even do that anymore?)
Wedge's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/10/2009 06:28
Wedge
Well, I have some stuff to mail tomorrow anyways...
garison's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/10/2009 06:57
garison
Freaking sweet idea, guys. I wonder what I'll send?
calpis's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/10/2009 07:01
calpis
I hope you guys like Hugh Jackman.
CALkulon's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/10/2009 07:02
CALkulon
Half Left, thats bollocks!
kittwalker's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/10/2009 07:06
kittwalker
Even though it wil likley cost a metric fuck-tonne to send something from Scotland, I reckon I'll do it anyway.

I just need to find something shit enuff.
kwaselow's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/10/2009 07:25
kwaselow
I want to get you a Jackie Chan anti-smoking poster, but it would be sent by the center for disease control, and it takes a while to get delivered
dc2005's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/10/2009 07:39
dc2005
When you say "Every 16th day of the month" does it mean that this contest will be running for more than a month? Will this be a monthly contest or a single contest that will last several months? when will it end? I want to know more!
Thornnn's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/10/2009 07:49
Thornnn
You've awakened the beast that is me I must wins another D-toid contest and I just bought a new camera this will require some thought.....Hmm....how to take pictures of a 300lb naked man tastefully enough to hang up in an office setting hmmm.......You will be getting my Package soon.
Guagloves's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/10/2009 08:07
Guagloves
Time to look for something random I don't want or buy something for cheap. Hopefully something awesome.
weirdfunk's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/10/2009 08:21
weirdfunk
How much would it cost to send something to you from Ontario?
ZombiePlatypus's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/10/2009 08:28
ZombiePlatypus
I have no idea what I'm going to send, but rest assured I'll think of something...
welkstar's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/10/2009 08:28
welkstar
Just in time for spring cleaning!
Niero's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/10/2009 08:38
Niero
Haha, oh, yeah we can't afford to send people copies of Waku Waku 7 each month or we'll be out of business fast. It has to be a retail game - any wii, ps3, xbox 360, pc, ds, or psp game under $59.99.

@weirdfunk - depends on the weight. check with ya post office

@dc2005 - yup, every month on the 16th! no end to the contest until we get sick of receiving stuff :)
VGFreak1225's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/10/2009 08:47
VGFreak1225
Dude, I have a manequin hand at home that you guys would get a kick out of. But how do I make it even more bizarre?
Tubatic's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/10/2009 09:26
Tubatic
Niero has startled the Thornn.
HamalSharatan's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/10/2009 09:29
HamalSharatan
destructoid is from miami? who knew!
Teta's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/10/2009 09:31
Teta
I´ll see if I can send my DTOID cardboard helm to you, only if the shipping cost cdoesn´t rape my ass without lube.
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