When I went to visit Rare's Studio and check out Viva Piñata: Pocket Paradise for the DS, one couldn't help but consider the future of the franchise. VP is an incredibly original and inventive IP, one that most definitely deserves a long future, but I realized there was a crucial flaw in the game -- Rare can only continue the series for as long as they can think of animal/candy wordplay.
Or can they?
As this musing reached its climactic peak, I imagined the bleakest future possible, a future where Rare had run out of candy portmanteaus and had to move onto chemical substances. In order to help my pals at Rare, I have taken it upon myself to draw up their concept art ... concept art from Hell ... and design creatures for the latest installment in the franchise -- Viva Piñarcotics!
[Drawing by Jim Sterling, coloring by the awesome Topher Cantler]
Appear Requirements: Have a set of weights in your garden
Visit Requirements: Have an intense pressure to perform at physical peak
Resident Requirements: Have a "best of Chris Benoit" DVD in your garden
Romance Requirements: Under cook dinner and cause a hyper violent 'roid rage fit
Appear Requirements: Have strobe lighting in your garden
Visit Requirements: Garden is 90% water (bottled)
Resident Requirements: Free glowsticks
Romance Requirements: Vomit onto the back of the person you're screwing in a dehydrated stupor
Appear Requirements: Grow some perfectly legal, unprepared mushrooms
Visit Requirements: Pick some perfectly legal, unprepared mushrooms
Resident Requirements: Maaaaybe do something with a perfectly legal pot of boiling water
Romance Requirements: Put your head in the boiling water after tripping out and thinking that Spidorpions are coming to stab your face off
Appear Requirements: Lose your girlfriend
Visit Requirements: Lose your job
Resident Requirements: Lose your house
Romance Requirements: Lose your razorblades
Appear Requirements: Build a Starbucks
Visit Requirements: Build another Starbucks
Resident Requirements: Build another Starbucks
Romance Requirements: Build two Starbuckses
Appear Requirements: Chemical set in your garden
Visit Requirements: Magic eye charts on all the walls
Resident Requirements: Some Hendrix on the radio
Romance Requirements: Stop having horrific hallucinations about the killer brainroaches
Appear Requirements: Jack Daniels
Visit Requirements: Southern Comfort
Resident Requirements: Smirnoff
Romance Requirements: Aftershave chased up with floor polish
Appear Requirements: Build a porn-and-booze-filled squat in your garden
Visit Requirements: The first hit is free
Resident Requirements: Have a wallet that keeps having cash "disappear" from it in your garden
Romance Requirements: Go on the game to support the skag habit
Appear Requirements: One radiator
Visit Requirements: One set of handcuffs
Resident Requirements: One bloodstained mattress
Romance Requirements: One television playing Trainspotting all day, every day
Contest:
I can doodle silly cartoons. Huge credit for how good they look really should go to the coloring and shading that Topher brought them to life with.
My original sketches DID include a Marijuaffe, actually. I also had Sea Weed planned out too.
The final drawings are only some of the ideas I had. I may do another in the far flung future if this one proves to be popular enough.
Btw, that random message from "wired ronin" was me cause I want to kill some ghosts as Lu Bu
Although I can see some assholes coming in here and insulting this. In fact, I can almost guarantee that will happen.
Plus clever names
ergo, i dig!
So good, Jim. Poor Cold Turkey ... :(
Though those are clearly not piñatas. I demand that they be made more frilly and flamboyant.
it's no Marijuaffe, but it'll do.
(kidding)
Fantastic work, Jim and Topher. The captions had me in fits of laughter!
Dugg like woah.
It needs a big picture with them all interacting in a garden now. That would be perfect.
I think we need a fundraiser for a Dtoid game studios. NOW.
Down in H-town it's called gettin' wet. Nothin' like some Screw and syrup.