Make no mistake: We work hard at Destructoid at these events, people.

We could blend in like those other smug journalistic bastards by wearing blazers, black-rimmed glasses and pounding two fists full cocktails while their pricey oblong cameras stab into passing cocktail waitress breasts but NOooOOooo! We're Dtoid bloggers. We stick out like dongs in a punch bowl. We're the guys balancing robot helmets, Spidey baggies, and defrosted quesadillas in one hand while the other flags bartenders, inserts FDA-approved toxins, enjoys Jerome's brownies, and trades colorful little paper rectangles with upwardly mobile 20's century primates in exchange for stuff that we don't get to keep anyway!

Why must wolves die? For you. (Yes, you too there in the underwear reading this at 4am!) We love you for reading Destructoid. Take it all -- our fortress closets are grateful but stand to crush our famished interns any day now. The first of many swag pack giveaways is a hardcover Spider-Man handbook, a two-sided Web of Shadows mask, a monthly subscription to play American McGee's Grimm (I may photocopy that), Marvel Alliance 2 dog tags, a glowing hipster necklace thing, a gel pen from the year 3592, and a glowing ice cube that turns your masculine cocktail into a gay pride parade.

Pry this loot from my dessicated corpse

Find the most "amazing" photo of a human being wearing a Spider-Man mask. You can interpret the criteria for the photo any way you wish; just keep it PG-13 and post your image using BBcode in the comments below. The contest ends when we're back from Comic-Con, so have at it!

Yeah, yeah, Dtoiders in Europe and abroad can enter too -- so don't make it bollocks, scheiße, etc!