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CNN launches game; sadly, it's not Wolf Blitzer's Magical Moustache Ride photo

CNN, Ted Turner's foray into the acrimonious world of televised dog-wagging, launched its first foray into gaming recently with the release of Presidential Pong, a Flash title destined to be exactly as entertaining as the original Pong; that is, not at all.

While this newly politicized update of the classic adds special abilities for the characters (drawn from the ranks of the Republican and Democratic presidential hopefuls) based on tongue-in-cheek depictions of their campaign strengths, it also loses the innocence that made the original Pong so insanely addictive, and, as the years went on, an electronic counterpart to the heartwarming traditionalism of a Thomas Kinkade painting. I guess the sort of people who don't giggle after saying 'caucus' might think this spin on the formula is clever, but those of us without direct access to Ted Kennedy's hooch closet will tire of it after a few moments, and only the lingering bitterness of a group of candidates that clearly embody the collapse of the last world superpower will remain etched in your mind.

Am I the only one who misses the wily antics of Ross Perot, or the fat-assed joviality of William Howard Taft?

Ah well, it could be worse. We could be English








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10 comments | showing # 1 to 10
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Justice's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/10/2007 08:33
Justice
Major lulz at Jim Sterling, whoever that guy is.

AND I AM ENGLISH!

Just because the bad seeds in our land (read: pilgrims) emigrated to some random placed and kicked out the locals!
(I'm lookin' at you aswell AUSTRALIA!)
dpell's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/10/2007 09:46
dpell
I'm English too, understand much of the post I did not. Besides, we're all a little bit English...
tazarthayoot's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/10/2007 09:56
tazarthayoot
FUCK THAT I'M AMERICAN I SPEAK AMERICAN!

Wouldn't it be awesome if there was a line rider type game made out of Wolf Blitzer's beard and moustache. I'm just throwing that out there.
Detry's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/10/2007 10:42
Detry
Fucking Taft, he's the real reason America is the way it is today.
TheStripe's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/10/2007 11:01
TheStripe
Wait, wasn't Australia your prison colony?

And what does Taft have to do with current American ills?
BahamutZero's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/10/2007 11:43
BahamutZero
that is the winning picture
Kozuch's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/10/2007 12:21
Kozuch
No matter, I think we all know there is only one celebrity that can pull off endorsing a mustache ride game. Tom Selleck.
GamexViral's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/10/2007 13:08
GamexViral
What do you have against rouges? LOL
plyr3005's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/10/2007 15:41
plyr3005
so. would obama's paddle be larger than the paddles of all other candidates?
sexycommando's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/10/2007 21:03
sexycommando
CNN? Yea I bet there will be NO bias or preferential representation of Democratic candidates in this game. Lol.
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