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Home Utterly pathetic updates

Canadian cops hop on the GTA IV stupid wagon

9:59 PM on 04.25.2008, Jim Sterling 48 comments

Canadian cops hop on the GTA IV stupid wagon photo
     Utterly pathetic

Probably feeling left out as the world's biggest moron parade marches by without them, the Calgary police department has come out to say that Grand Theft Auto IV is a "grave concern" and is worried about children becoming exposed to it, thus turning into psychopathic killers because they played a videogame.

This news comes as posted in the Calgary Sun

City cops are warning parents to be careful about exposing children to video game violence, saying it’s a possible training ground for criminal endeavours.

The article also quotes Calgary police spokesman Kevin Brookwell:

From the Calgary Police Service perspective, we see these types of video games as a grave concern… Because of the lack of consequences and even reward — (youth) don’t understand the impact violence can have.

In some cases, those very games may be training grounds for people to commit criminal activity.

It's with bitter amusement that I watch trained professionals who are used to dealing with hardened criminals and dangerous thugs running scared of a videogame. The real concern that should be had in Calgary is why its police department wasted time scaremongering over a game when it could have been dealing with real crime. But of course, nobody's going to ask a question like that, because people are too stupid to see anything beyond the scary, scary game that is going to transform innocent little Billy into a supervillain overnight.

I've seen that happen, you know. One day I gave my brother a copy of San Andreas, the very next morning he was manipulating metal objects with his mind and plotting to destroy Professor Charles Xavier.


Next page: More Grand Theft Auto stories




Electro Lemon's Avatar
Electro Lemon at 04/25/2008 22:11
Jim Magneto.
Velt's Avatar
Velt at 04/25/2008 22:32
Foxtoid, also lawsuits.
rbrooks's Avatar
rbrooks at 04/25/2008 22:37
again, parents don't fucking buy this game for your underage kids...don't fucking do it...i don't care, no one knows the effect of younger kids...so might as well nto expose them...as for me... imma rock it out!
Dr Milkdad's Avatar
Dr Milkdad at 04/25/2008 22:38
Angry because you're out of the playoffs and now you need to distract yourselves with some bull shit, fuck off Alberta.
NightDehumidifier's Avatar
NightDehumidifier at 04/25/2008 22:40
Canada is so much better than Amerikkka. FUCK BU$H GO LEAFS!
Xenophilius's Avatar
Xenophilius at 04/25/2008 22:46
man, the leafs suck, habs ftw.
rbrooks's Avatar
rbrooks at 04/25/2008 22:47
@ Dr Milkdad

go fuck yourself
...i'm from calgary, and i wouldn't offend where ever it is you're from. Oh btw check out the gaming legislation, none in alberta, but there is some in ontario where i'm guess you're from. SAD
MrSadistic's Avatar
MrSadistic at 04/25/2008 23:07
(CLICHE, HATEFUL REMARK ABOUT AMERICA!)
Sam Spectre's Avatar
Sam Spectre at 04/25/2008 23:08
I still don't understand why the media and some politicians make such a big deal out of a violent video game release but they don't give a shit about all the violent movies being released every year.


Really though, I can't wait for that generation to die off...
bleep's Avatar
bleep at 04/25/2008 23:09
HAHA Canadians are afraid of their own shadows!

also Mr Sterling, cool graphic! where it come from?
NightDehumidifier's Avatar
NightDehumidifier at 04/25/2008 23:22
Habs are great and support Canada's love affair with homos. Leafs are legends of liquor and livations.
sushi111's Avatar
sushi111 at 04/25/2008 23:22
Yeah Canada is probably a better place to live now, but as you can see from these posts both countries have douchebags.
bam2003's Avatar
bam2003 at 04/25/2008 23:25
@bleep
i believe the americans are making a bigger deal out of this than canada, as for canadians are afraid of our own shadows HAHA this coming from the country that fox news came out of?
Projectexodus's Avatar
Projectexodus at 04/26/2008 00:13
Oh bloody hell! I splattered people's heads in videogames since before I was 10!
Are children these days so retarded that they cant tell the difference between reality and virtual reality?
Was I just too intelligent for my age?
Or are the adults these days just overeacting?
I think I'll go for the latter...
ultrapeanut's Avatar
ultrapeanut at 04/26/2008 00:26
That graphic really is glorious.
Gen Eric Gui's Avatar
Gen Eric Gui at 04/26/2008 00:39
I don't agree with their assertion that this is a "training ground for crime." But I do actually applaud them for making a point to tell parents to watch out and not buy this for their kids.

The more people drone on about the ratings system, the less able people are to pin blame on not knowing about the label system.
DJDuffy 's Avatar
DJDuffy at 04/26/2008 00:54
heeeey...im from Canada, but luckily not from Calgary (that place is a total dumb)
Mxyzptlk's Avatar
Mxyzptlk at 04/26/2008 00:56
Canada has a police force?
joeisremy's Avatar
joeisremy at 04/26/2008 01:10
I played GTA3 for 5 minutes and went out a found a hooker, I was very disappointed when no money popped out of them.

The I pushed r1 and circle and killed a police officer


shit was fucked up
MechaMonkey's Avatar
MechaMonkey at 04/26/2008 01:43
@Mxy

I think he means the Mounties. Or the moose. One or the other.
AlucardX24's Avatar
AlucardX24 at 04/26/2008 01:45
Wait, wait. Canada has crime?
TrailerParkJesus's Avatar
TrailerParkJesus at 04/26/2008 01:53
oh Canada
jakethebob's Avatar
jakethebob at 04/26/2008 02:05
OK i am from Calgary and the cops in Calgary do stupid shit like this all the time. i just hope they don't hijack my ups gta4 box
joshandrox's Avatar
joshandrox at 04/26/2008 02:05
Looking for the cliche "blame canada". No dice, oh and @ NightDehumidifier you can be an asshole, good for you. The US built GTA. Its modeled after an american city. What's your beef?
BlackSunEmpire's Avatar
BlackSunEmpire at 04/26/2008 02:43
I went to Calgary last year, and I wouldnt be in a huge hurry to go back, but I suppose if you accidentally ended up there and couldnt leave, GTA 4 would be exactly what you would need to take your mind off it. 2 weeks in Vancouver Island was much better.
GrayFox's Avatar
GrayFox at 04/26/2008 02:49
fuck off eh?
Kyousuke Nanbu's Avatar
Kyousuke Nanbu at 04/26/2008 02:53
If anything the consequences are more severe in GTA, I know plenty of assholes who should be in pound me in the ass prison but aren't.

Oh well, till people realize that gaming isn't this mysterious hobby that only a few people do, this will keep happening, people fear what they don't understand.
JamesO's Avatar
JamesO at 04/26/2008 03:53
Ok, ok, people, reality check - read the article:

City cops are warning parents to be careful about exposing children...

CHILDREN. Not teenagers or 20-somethings. The reality is that the game is ultra violent and is rated M17. I couldn't watch 'Spaceballs' when I was in grade 4 because of the mature content, and games like this have to be looked at in the same way. (Spaceballs, I love you, kiss kiss)

Obviously the 'violence in video games' shtick is old and retarded, but let's examine things with a bit of maturity here: Your 10-year-old kid brother shouldn't be playing it.
Jim Sterling's Avatar
Jim Sterling at 04/26/2008 05:38
Your ten-year old brother also won't turn into a master criminal if he does.

Children don't view violence the same way adults, with their jaded and sordid eyes, view violence. At least fake violence.
Timmeh's Avatar
Timmeh at 04/26/2008 06:09
lol, this is the most blatant bandwagon hopping I've seen yet.

Why is it these retards just don't get it. Irrespective of possible harm you shouldn't be buying your kids GTAIV anyway. Fucking dimwits.
MotherCanucker's Avatar
MotherCanucker at 04/26/2008 07:57
@ Jim Sterling

Your ten year old brother shouldn't play GT4, just like he shouldn't watch Saw 4. Stop, end of statement. End of discussion.

If people would follow the damn ratings guide we wouldn't have to listen to this crap out of cops and lobbyists all the time.
Jim Sterling's Avatar
Jim Sterling at 04/26/2008 08:07
"Your ten year old brother shouldn't play GT4"

What's wrong with Gran Turismo? :-(
Jetsetlemming's Avatar
Jetsetlemming at 04/26/2008 08:35
Haha Canada. So whimsical and entertainingly stupid.

This is the second stupid news I've heard from Canada in two days. For shame. Yesterday the Toronto public transportation union, all of whom's members make at least $30/hr, went on strike without any notice or forewarning, despite having previously promised they'd give 2 day's notice as to not fuck over everyone in the goddamn city.
I have no idea what their demands are, but I can't think of much you could want when you're making $30/hr for unskilled labor.
Ronsauce's Avatar
Ronsauce at 04/26/2008 09:00
"Haha Canada. So whimsical and entertainingly stupid."

Like someone already said, at least we don't have Fox News. It's practically Comedy Central's sister network.
balth's Avatar
balth at 04/26/2008 09:06
You know, technically Rockstar is in Scotland, so shouldn't we

Blame Scotland

... okay, that doesn't roll off the tongue as nicely as
The Young Scot's Avatar
The Young Scot at 04/26/2008 09:27
@balth

Don't make me set aboot ye.
B-Radicate's Avatar
B-Radicate at 04/26/2008 09:45
Somehow, Canada just got dumber.
Slick Icarus's Avatar
Slick Icarus at 04/26/2008 10:01
Old People Logic: Video games are for kids, so,
ZOMG GTAIV IS FOR KIDS JESUS SAVE US!
Aertyr's Avatar
Aertyr at 04/26/2008 10:48
In other news today, the end of the world was started by a man named Aertyr who sent off a nuclear bomb in Russia today. Apparently he learned how to do this by pressing buttons on the Atari. It's official, video games are the cause of everything ever.
Superfluous Moniker's Avatar
Superfluous Moniker at 04/26/2008 12:11
Yes, unreleased sequels to games that didn't destroy society years ago are destroying society. I like the logic.
Barcode's Avatar
Barcode at 04/26/2008 12:17
I'm tired of reading about this shit. How about we actually do something, like email Fox News about the real facts of games and inform them about how videos games are not the problem. Pulling ads and censoring products simply will not stop the sales.

Seriously, I've had enough of this shit.

Back in the 1800s, crime rates were down while everyone read stories filled with sex, killings, murders, and just about anything that is in today's video games.

They are simply repeating themselves here by censoring the published works of art.
Farktoid's Avatar
Farktoid at 04/26/2008 17:24
Nobody would point this out unless video games and new media were a threat to print and old media like television. They are now threatened, and do what they can to scare parents so the children watch TV instead of play videogames.

Protip: It's not working.
JustLikeBuck's Avatar
JustLikeBuck at 04/28/2008 03:11
Vidia Games are powerful JooJoo. I once took part in a Nethack marathon, and began to hallucinate.

I resisted the urge to kill the multi coloured @s, and befriended a lovable d.
lordsalmon's Avatar
lordsalmon at 04/29/2008 14:43
I blame rap music...
GOLD5's Avatar
GOLD5 at 05/07/2008 22:55
This reminds me of that hilarious time when jackbooted Canadian cops arrested Madonna in Toronto for obscenity (see Truth or Dare movie). Canada also banned the animated Heavy Metal movie when it came out and when the 25th anniversary VHS tape came out they had to lift the ban because the movie seemed pretty tame by todays standards. They even censored the pictures of ladies privates from magazines like Penthouse and Hustler until about 1993 when the companies started printing the magazines in Montreal and then distributing them from there instead of importing from the US. We are talking crotch shots here and no hardcore, although those magazines just werent allowed in at all. Swedish Erotica or Private magazines went for about $50 each here and were really hard to find, even at a sex shop. Apparently Canada Customs agents were taking it upon themselves to censor incoming publications but they had no rules or laws to follow from our government, they were just upholding their own personal sense of decency. Thats why sometimes some things would be censored and then the next month the same thing would get by; different customs person that month. An issue of Penthouse Comix was even censored when one character spanked another a la The Spirit cover by Will Eisner. They put a big white sticker over the whole magazine page just to cover that one panel. Im just glad that enough of the conservative oldsters who wish the queen was still our ruler and who hold up faux religious values while breaking their own rules from behind closed doors have finally retired and we can have some colloquial talk in our literature now. The US constitution protects freedom of the speech and press but in Canada we have a lame-ass charter of rights in which the first paragraph states that they can override any of the freedoms any time they want. Dont listen to anything people from Calgary say, all they care about is hockey, which they were busy watching instead of turning off their sets on Earth Day recently. You can bet your ass that they wont be warning anyone about how watching and playing hockey teaches people that fist fighting is an acceptable way of solving disputes with another athlete.
Shinu's Avatar
Shinu at 06/18/2008 13:13
canada is getting worse, just watch that oncoming C-10 movie censorship bill...

/sigh

i hope stephen harpers dies
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