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Breasts are awesome: uncut Need for Speed: ProStreet promo proves as much
Nex11.26.08 - 11:27 AM 43 comments

Breasts are awesome: uncut Need for Speed: ProStreet promo proves as much screenshot

Normally I'm really highbrow. I wear a smoking jacket at entirely inappropriate times, fill my pipe with the shredded remains of a Jane Eyre first edition and often refer to cars as "horseless cars." However, neither that trademark pretension nor my inability to read Polish could tarnish my glee after receiving this link from Polish site Polygamia collecting the vaguely infamous nudie pics EA has been using to promote Need for Speed: ProStreet, the Old Man and the Sea of peeling out and assuming all Asian people hang tiny dragons from their rearview mirrors.

See, that link contains two of my favorite things in the history of mankind: the female body unsullied by age, child birth, meth addiction, animal attacks or nuclear fallout and laughably sexist renditions of the old adage "sex sells."

Surely, placing fantastic breasts in front of phallic motor vehicles is as close to actually having a woman insert the NFS:PS disc into her vagina as you can get without actively upsetting the then-marginalized female denizens of the 'net, and to EA's credit, the target audience for a game like this is exactly the sort who wouldn't be bothered by things like sexism, or the fact that Susan B. Anthony's zombified corpse is a ravenous beast hungering only for brains and the male genitalia they happen to be encased within.

All that aside though, even the most bra-burningly active activist can't deny the beauty found in nekkid ladies. Girls are pretty. Pretty girls especially so. With that in mind, let's all forget about the underlying social issues present in this piece and instead just marvel at the grace of the female form.

It's what John Wayne would do. 

(Also, I should have mentioned that that link isn't work-safe a while ago, but if any of you actually get fired for glorifying beauty, your boss never loved you in the first place.) 



MORE IN OUR NSFW SECTION

Latest comment by luvmysegadc |view all 43 comments
I must have some serious jet lag! Instead of hearing the voices of those two lovely ladies speak in the video, all I could hear were the character voice from the award winning animated short "Cr......



JACK of No Trades's Avatar
JACK of No Trades at 11/26/2007 11:28

Need for Speed what?
Barcode's Avatar
Barcode at 11/26/2007 11:29

I find it really funny for that the girls have nothing to do with racing itself.

I guess it's more of a tatic to lure sex crazed teenage guys into buying the game.
lubczyk's Avatar
lubczyk at 11/26/2007 11:32

Prostreet sucks so much they have to go trashy porno in order to sell it. If you're a 360 or PS3 owner, hell even a PS2 owner there's no reason for you to own this terrible game. This game will probably sell like hotcakes on the Wii because the only decent racing game on the system is Excite Truck. AS Holllywood has proven time and time again: shit sells as long as it's pretty shit.
B-Radicate's Avatar
B-Radicate at 11/26/2007 11:39

I stopped caring about NFS after the first Underground.

I get my racing fix from Burnout (for the crashes) and Midnight Club (for the customization). Then again, I rarely have a racing desire to fulfill, so it's even more rare that I fix it with anything, haha.

What can I say, I'm an action gamer, not a racing one. Oh well.
Mister Disco's Avatar
Mister Disco at 11/26/2007 11:41

Need for Speed is fail.

Boobs, however, are always win. Thanks for the "heads up". :P
KamikazeTutor's Avatar
KamikazeTutor at 11/26/2007 11:54

"Need For Sex"

lol
timtheterrible's Avatar
timtheterrible at 11/26/2007 11:55

I like that they are taking this approach.
Upgrayedd's Avatar
Upgrayedd at 11/26/2007 11:59

Wait, did you just say that Susan B. Anthony's zombified corpse loves the cock?
Jerkbutt47's Avatar
Jerkbutt47 at 11/26/2007 11:59

I love the polish...
MaxVest's Avatar
MaxVest at 11/26/2007 12:01

Damn straight, sex sells. After seeing those pictures, I bought a Ferrari F430.
Nex's Avatar
Nex at 11/26/2007 12:01

Yeah Up. I'm trying to patent the triple entendre.
How'd it work for you? Feeling light-headed? Nauseous? Need a nap?
13thDragon's Avatar
13thDragon at 11/26/2007 12:12

Best. Game Ad. Ever.
Mxyzptlk's Avatar
Mxyzptlk at 11/26/2007 12:17

I wasn't planning on buying this game, but dude... tits.
amalgamut00's Avatar
amalgamut00 at 11/26/2007 12:24

did anybody buy this game?
Mabec's Avatar
Mabec at 11/26/2007 12:29

Need for Speed PROstitutes
BlackDove's Avatar
BlackDove at 11/26/2007 12:30

Nice tits.

Too bad the game is a joke. It's like money down the toilet for the developer.
Oni's Avatar
Oni at 11/26/2007 12:30

Man, I love Page3. It makes my chewy center all warm and melty.
Trowble's Avatar
Trowble at 11/26/2007 12:32

I was sold at breasts.
jerrt's Avatar
jerrt at 11/26/2007 12:35

i've got no complaints about the ads, but it doesn't get me interested in the game.
JonDarkwood's Avatar
JonDarkwood at 11/26/2007 12:43

This is as much of a put-off as Ubi using Jade Raymond for every interview to sell Assassin's Creed.
mikeohara's Avatar
mikeohara at 11/26/2007 12:47

the use of tits to promote a game that's heavily defined as nothing short of very shitty is still good promotion, me thinks.
big filth's Avatar
big filth at 11/26/2007 13:03

wow! great marketing approach! Maybe Assassins Creed will go this route with Ms. Raymond for the sequel! Take notes Ubisoft! But seriously, these sluts are hot!

on another note.

Matriarch Benezia = BITCH!

http://www.thegreatgamer.wordpress.com
Fuzzy's Avatar
Fuzzy at 11/26/2007 13:14

I fully support this type of ad campaign for every game that is marketed to me. Will I buy more shitty games because of this? No. But I will see more tits. And that, my friends, is always a good thing.
Oni's Avatar
Oni at 11/26/2007 13:36

Fuzzy's got the right idea.
John Martone's Avatar
John Martone at 11/26/2007 14:04

Did you mean "horseless carriages?" That is to say, referring to cars as "horseless cars" sounds a bit silly to me. Might be a meme I don't know of.
brad drac's Avatar
brad drac at 11/26/2007 14:11

Pff, if you were really highbrow, you wouldn't have used the word car twice in the same sentence. Such a horrid linguistic faux pas!
Nex's Avatar
Nex at 11/26/2007 14:20

Well, last-two-people, that was the gag. Exactly what you both said, in fact, was the gag.

Would you have preferred "birdless zeppelins?"
brad drac's Avatar
brad drac at 11/26/2007 14:22

Don't be ridiculous. Zeppelins don't use birds.
Nex's Avatar
Nex at 11/26/2007 14:27

face + palm / zero

See what you made me do? Now I have to go power cycle the universe!
brad drac's Avatar
brad drac at 11/26/2007 14:43

Well I'm sorry if you didn't catch the inherent irony in my comments. They were actually uproariously funny, it's not my fault the rest of the world is too foppishly feeble minded to grasp the subtle intricacies of my gloriously resplendent humour.
Nex's Avatar
Nex at 11/26/2007 15:14

THAT'S THE OTHER GAG!
YOU'RE STEALING ALL OF MY MATERIAL!
Turtule Soup's Avatar
Turtule Soup at 11/26/2007 15:17

Purchases game lol jk
monosylabik's Avatar
monosylabik at 11/26/2007 15:24

o those polish...why no halo 3 noods?
Azereki's Avatar
Azereki at 11/26/2007 16:24

EA are gods!
Elrando's Avatar
Elrando at 11/26/2007 19:04

Boobs are awesome, NFS series however is a boring shitfest.
Having something awesome like boobs, next to something shitty like NFS only serves to emphasize how awesome boobs are and how shitty NFS is.
Your plan has failed EA, badly.
Sharpless's Avatar
Sharpless at 11/26/2007 22:42

Nex, the "horseless cars" line gave me a much-needed laugh. Two people in this thread need to update their senses of humor. :)
Fading_Star's Avatar
Fading_Star at 11/27/2007 01:03

@Elrando
They could have taken a screenshot from Superman 64, place the NFS logo in it, and make the tagline say "Hey, it could be worse." instead of this. Oh well.
brad drac's Avatar
brad drac at 11/27/2007 05:55

->Sharpless: I think you missed the point of my comments(if it was me you were talking about). What you saw there was a fairly deftly executed troll based on the premise of nex's fondness for irony and his self assured superiority. We cool de la.
Sharpless's Avatar
Sharpless at 11/27/2007 08:39

Nah, I wasn't really paying much attention to who said what. You'll find that I halfass most of my comments by just pretending to know what I'm talking about. You're in the clear.
Rigor Mortis's Avatar
Rigor Mortis at 11/27/2007 09:31

NFS has been going downhill since Porsche Unleashed and Underground 2. I hope ProStreet crashes and burns.
Scrixx's Avatar
Scrixx at 11/27/2007 16:17

EA doing something right? :o!
luvmysegadc's Avatar
luvmysegadc at 11/27/2007 23:47

I must have some serious jet lag! Instead of hearing the voices of those two lovely ladies speak in the video, all I could hear were the character voice from the award winning animated short "Creature Comforts". They sound like the polar bears from the short film.

http://www.atomfilms.com/film/creature_comforts.jsp

Of course if you're looking for some hot rabbids action, click here:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WMCixSI-pGA&feature=related

You must be logged in to post a comment. Click here to login or create a user account now.

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