4:09 AM on 04.01.2008
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Niero
ZIMBABWE: Police have arrested game journalist Geoff Knightley's copy of Mass Effect for indecent exposure and filthy, filthy acts of unnatural sodomy. A neighbor phoned 911 after spotting the Mature-rated jewel case sprawled doggy-style on top of a helpless oak entertainment center. "I was near a window while digging for treasure in his yard and there it was! Humping it in every form, format, multiple, gender-oriented possibility you can think of." Authorities escorted the four-disc copulation simulator from his soiled apartment while "developmental furniture maker" Copper Rincewind comforted the 14-year old cabinet with a fluffy yellow dust tickler and lemon-scented Pledge wipes.
Minutes later a Foxtoid sexpert tried contacting the legal guardian of the game to comment on behalf of his estranged Xbox 360 title but the interview quickly turned violent. Geoff refused to cooperate with the press, only yelling: "IT'S A F*CKING INANIMATE VIDEO GAME BOX! WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU RETARDS?!!" before he was wrestled to the ground by nearby retired police dogs and sailors. Mass Effect is currently serving 21+ years at ESRB penitentiary with no hope of parole.
[Via Wikipedia]
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Contest:
It's art dammit, why don't they understand!
I'm tired of seeing parents have to watch their kids. It's insane. Adults should be able to do whatever they want, and whenever they want. Children should not have to burden us with their needs.
Parenting is a thing of the past and I will not stand to see video games try and resurrect such a prehistoric job. Hell, if I could I'd wrap my children around in a huge bubble. That way they can't be exposed to any type of danger. Hell, they may be weaker and socially retarded, but at least they're safe and I had to do very little.
Away with video games. AWAY!
BURN THE GRANDPARENTS!!
Geoff Keighley is in cahoots with Osama bin Laden.
"NO! I don't believe it!"
That or it can burn in the chair.
lol 2nd best april fools XD
1st was seeing nintendo fanboys go nuts at the death of shigeru miyamoto who died of a heart attack leaving behind wife child.... and plumber and boy in green. David Beckham sends his sincere condolances XD
3rd best is blizzard entertainments trailer of wow on the Atari 2600 XD
Come back to me!
HAHA! I literally just laughed out loud at work! but its all good, I just told my Boss I was checking fox news quickly and she totally understood why I might be laughing.
Foxtoid=WIN!
I won't believe this... I... I just can't...