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Boy defends PS3 with samurai sword - wins badass of the day award
Jim Sterling06.12.08 - 3:14 PM 45 comments

Boy defends PS3 with samurai sword - wins badass of the day award screenshot

We all laughed at the Sony Protection Group and their mission to save the PlayStation 3, but here comes a boy who's console truly needed protection, and he came to its aid in a way that would make any real gamer proud - with a samurai sword! Damian Fernandez, a teen with a brown belt in karate, was home alone with his sister Deanne when burglars broke into the house. What these two intruders didn't know, however, was that no man, woman or child would give up a PS3 - not when it might have games one day.

As Deanne hid in a closet, the burglars helped themselves to some jewelry from the parents' room before discovering an empty PS3 box. By this time, however, Damian had woken up and was prepared for them, having jumped from his bunk bed clutching ancient Japanese weaponry in hand. When one of the would-be PlayStation thieves came his way, Damian made his move, striking him in the chest and attacking his weak point for massive damage. "He freaked out," Damian told Local10.com. Was he really? There's a surprise.

The burglar, 21 year old Javier Cotera, panicked and ran, escaping the house while being chased down the street by the sword wielding teenager. Eventually a police K-9 unit located the, likely humiliated, Cotera hiding behind a palm tree, though the second man got away.

And you guys call yourselves hardcore gamers? This kid is made from a most epic strain of win.

[Thanks to Joe Burling, who's Dtoid name I forget. Sign your tips so I know how to address you guys, because I'm all "who the **** is Joe Burling?]



MORE IN OUR samurai SECTION

Latest comment by Aurain |view all 45 comments
Should have put a Xbox 1 in that PS3 box. Not only would they not have been able to pick up the box, if they had both managed to pick it up, they would have opened it to find an old redundant PoS....



Reeper's Avatar
Reeper at 06/12/2007 15:11

joe burling
jim sterling

connection?
Jim Sterling's Avatar
Jim Sterling at 06/12/2007 15:14

I did notice that as I typed it out. THERE IS SINISTER WORK AFOOT!
BahamutZero's Avatar
BahamutZero at 06/12/2007 15:16

what about the SINISTER WORK OF MY MUCH FUNNIER BLOG POST?!?!?@@#?#>#?>2@?>#@##$$

http://www.destructoid.com/blogs/BahamutZero/there-can-be-only-one-32851.phtml
BahamutZero's Avatar
BahamutZero at 06/12/2007 15:16

sterling we are not friends!
DJDuffy 's Avatar
DJDuffy at 06/12/2007 15:16

ahaaa...I always knew that Sterling tipped himself to gain false popularity. 'Tis a crime!
BahamutZero's Avatar
BahamutZero at 06/12/2007 15:17

just kidding. Can I borrow some "quid"s?
Reeper's Avatar
Reeper at 06/12/2007 15:17

i believe joe burling is his alias...
tehdopefish's Avatar
tehdopefish at 06/12/2007 15:19

ah-HA THE TABLES HAVE TURNED!

on a related note: who the fuck is John Curling?
bigfatton's Avatar
bigfatton at 06/12/2007 15:24

Fucking owned!!!
Dexter345's Avatar
Dexter345 at 06/12/2007 15:24

I'm confused. Did he strike him in the chest with a samurai sword? Because I would do more than freak out if that happened.
TheStripe's Avatar
TheStripe at 06/12/2007 15:24

What? Phil Perling?
galagabug 's Avatar
galagabug at 06/12/2007 15:24

i always thought
stim jerling was jim sterling's alias.

so, why the fuck it tom hurling?
Racoon's Avatar
Racoon at 06/12/2007 15:26

Yep he did, stabbed him in the chest; I'm not so sure about the kid chasing him down the street though, that part seems a little sensationalized.
908peruvian's Avatar
908peruvian at 06/12/2007 15:51

i feel like starting a fight club in honor of this kid
ArrestedDeveloper's Avatar
ArrestedDeveloper at 06/12/2007 15:53

I Once defended my Snes with a baguette.
UNDERSTAR's Avatar
UNDERSTAR at 06/12/2007 16:05

Congrats to the sap with teh sword of million deaths!! Bwahahaaha!!
SpiderChrist's Avatar
SpiderChrist at 06/12/2007 16:10

"It is not enough to succeed. Others must fail"
ohgr89's Avatar
ohgr89 at 06/12/2007 16:12

'Not when there might be games some day"

hahahaha. denial.
Fana7ic's Avatar
Fana7ic at 06/12/2007 16:22

ahahahahahahahaha.
Kickass
cbebop007's Avatar
cbebop007 at 06/12/2007 16:28

don't fuck with gamers
jerrt's Avatar
jerrt at 06/12/2007 16:37

i've got a big wooden mallet made in a Gallagher fashion, if i caught someone trying to steal my ps triple, there would be brain matter all over my living room.

props to you kid, keep up the good work. [:
Teta's Avatar
Teta at 06/12/2007 16:38

Press L1 to target burglar.
Press X to stab.
Hold /\ to run like a madman down the street chasing your opponent.
aborto thefetus's Avatar
aborto thefetus at 06/12/2007 16:53

To tell you the truth, I would use any burglary or breakin in my house to stab and/or beat up a robber.
Isn't there a law that says you can do anything to anyone who enters your house uninvited?
Monte's Avatar
Monte at 06/12/2007 17:13

@aborto thefetus

honestly not sure about that... i've heard some stories of thieves breaking into houses, getting themselves injuried, and then sueing the owner of the house, and winning...

stories i recall was i think i guy coming through a skylight in the kitchen, only to fall and land on a knife or something... and another one breaking in through the garage only to end up getting himself lock inside; and the owner was away on vacation for like a week... ya, i only very baguely remember hearing these things, but i think that's how they went... how it makes sense is beyong me (hense why i question my memory)
uglymofo's Avatar
uglymofo at 06/12/2007 17:26

@aborto
unless you live in a state with a "make my day" law, you're better off going easy on those who may burgle you. if you *are* in a 'make my day' state, lock and load, brother.
s0lesurviv0r's Avatar
s0lesurviv0r at 06/12/2007 17:46

I'll be picking up one of these when I get my 360.
DOLEMITE187's Avatar
DOLEMITE187 at 06/12/2007 17:55

That's nothing think waht this guy would do if you stole his ps2!
http://youtube.com/watch?v=YS_Dh11vHQE
Jark212's Avatar
Jark212 at 06/12/2007 18:50

you have to respect a man like that
Crunshii's Avatar
Crunshii at 06/12/2007 19:00

thats right bishes! thats how Hialeah Karate-PS3-own3rs-with-Katanas defend their shyt.

Now imagine if that kid had a Wii instead of a PS3...

someone should PM good old jack, gamer used bravery to defend his PS3 (and little sister) by playing Ninja Gaiden demo.
Crunshii's Avatar
Crunshii at 06/12/2007 19:03

oh btw, the most fucked up shit is that that the caught thief of 2 is walking free in the streets... he payed bail so now he can go rob again...

awesome system, no?
Angry Irish's Avatar
Angry Irish at 06/12/2007 19:34

Wow. I'd just use druid powers.
BuckF1tches's Avatar
BuckF1tches at 06/12/2007 19:48

Joe Burling is by far the coolest person I have ever met. He single handedly killed 67 wolves, created da skillz, won teh halos, and is more awesomer than words. His children will be made of solid gold and his balls are made of platinum. He is truly a man amongst men.
TheStripe's Avatar
TheStripe at 06/12/2007 19:51

Neet! The haters start in on the Wii, and it's not even in the post. Well done, crunsh, you never fail to disappoint.

If you do get in an altercation with a home invader, you're better off killing him, so there's only one side to the story. If the kid chased the would-be thief down the street, he could get busted for menacing or even assault with a deadly weapon. Your right to defend your home ends at the threshold.
Im OK's Avatar
Im OK at 06/12/2007 19:51

(Jack Thompson)

Who needs games when the console itself is driving these insane pixelantes to attack poor helpless burglars with swords!!!

(/Jack Thompson)
Doomtrain's Avatar
Doomtrain at 06/12/2007 21:35

I have respect for this man. A great deal of it.
Aex's Avatar
Aex at 06/12/2007 22:41

What'ya expect, its a fucking PS3. I'd stab a bitch trying to steal mine too... If I had one that is...
Johnnyreb2565's Avatar
Johnnyreb2565 at 06/12/2007 23:18

Way to go! My home protection is a gun and a WWI bayonet, but the bayonet would be deadly.
DoctorEuphony's Avatar
DoctorEuphony at 06/13/2007 02:31

Wow..wii bashing in a thread not even wii related. A one-trick pony you are, perhaps?
RICHARD BLOCKER's Avatar
RICHARD BLOCKER at 06/13/2007 08:03

I once got drunk and threw an ashtray at a hippie's head for beating me at soul calibur. Does that make me a hero on par with this guy? I thought not.
Vigor's Avatar
Vigor at 06/13/2007 14:00

I heard when the burgular tried to run. The kid hopped from rooftop to rooftop like crouching tiger. Then threw a shuriken in his leg. That true?
that1guy's Avatar
that1guy at 06/13/2007 15:08

LMAO @ Vigor....This is truly awesome....I have no katana or ps3 but i do have a life size replica of the witch king's sword from LOTR and a wii mote... :) Potential robbers bewarned...lol
that1guy's Avatar
that1guy at 06/13/2007 15:10

oh and at richard blocker wtf and lmfao...eye of sauron costume ftw...lol
Aurain's Avatar
Aurain at 06/14/2007 00:03

Should have put a Xbox 1 in that PS3 box. Not only would they not have been able to pick up the box, if they had both managed to pick it up, they would have opened it to find an old redundant PoS.

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