I was looking forward to providing regular updates on Bob of Bob's Game fame as he continues his 100 day protest. As you may know by now, Bob locked himself in his room, claiming to isolate himself from society for 100 days or until Nintendo heard his pleas and gave him a license to officially publish his game on the DS. After a mere month, Bob has been found lying twitching on his floor, having surrendered.
"Nintendo sells all these games about "doing your best" and "being the hero," telling kids "you can do it if you try," but in the end that's just a story, a marketing lie that sounds good," declares Bob. "That's business. That's the real world. In reality, if Link approached the castle gate, a guard would just throw him out. It doesn't matter how much courage he has. It doesn't matter how talented he is with his sword, or how pure hearted he might be. He's wearing a dirty tunic and he has no credentials. 'Get out of here, you stupid kid.' The evil kingdom of Ganon (Or should I say 'Gantendo') spreads across the land, Zelda dies, and the credits scroll. Game over. That's the real Nintendo, I guess."
"... I really tried my best. Show's over. It's just not going to work. Sorry, everyone. I just can't stay in here. My head won't stop pounding. I feel like I'm losing my mind. It's like I'm splitting in half. I keep seeing these posts that I apparently wrote, but I can't remember writing them. I'm afraid I'm becoming someone else entirely."
Maybe Bob never really locked himself in his room. Maybe Bob never even made a game. Maybe this was all a sham. Maybe, however, maybe everything that happened was actually true. All we know now, is that there's a rather funny GIF of him lying on the floor (thanks for that, Pedro).
"My head hurts, so I'm ending this post. Sorry, everybody. Whatever. Why does this HURT so much?! :'{"
Goodbye, Bob.
Contest:
10:18 AM on 01.10.2009 | 
I guess the lesson to learn from this is to not spend 5 years making a game by yourself with no guarantee that it will actually see a release.
Now if Link rolled up to Hyrule, after having saved Kakoriko Village, assisted the Gorons, found the lost royalty of the Mer-People he's have some decent credentials.
Also, he'd best put on his red tunic and mirrors shield. Looking and acting the part goes a long way.
And if the guards still refuses him, screw them. Scale the freaking castle wall and stealth-action your way in, like Link did in Ocarina of Time.
Your answer is in your metaphor/conceit Bob.
Well, don't spend 5 years making a game independently for proprietary software and expect a guaranteed release . . .
That's one way of getting attention.
Well, no love lost, Bob. Your game would probably just have been R4ed anyway, and there's always the PC release to fill that void.
@ Faux:
No, they just turn into Vampires. Everyone knows that.
Want to be a badass though? Overcome the bullshit... go to indie developers and sell it, or make it a charge-for-download for people who have not-R4s (of course, these are the same kind of people who would steal it haha). But just because something doesn't go your way do you give up...
Don't forget how many guards he destroyed in Link to the Past
But the game also has a digital representation of his face in photorealistic 16-bit . . . soooooo I guess he does come off as a little creepy . . .
Just throwing that thought...
. . . oh yeah. Good point . . .
Link's a horrible metaphor Bob. I'm completely wrong. :D :D
Either way, it's really fun to watch.
Your tactfulness is exemplary!
"Gantendo"
Because the hero speaks (saw it in the teaser video). When you're playing an RPG and the hero speaks, it can be a problem because the hero might just happen to be a whiny bitch (see also: people complaining about Cloud and Squall in their respective games). Nobody wants to role play a whiny bitch. Now take a game written by someone who is clearly emotionally unbalanced like this guy and you can guarantee that there's some emo crap in there.
If that is even your real name.
I guess that "no bad publicity" thing is true.
I suggest Xbox community games... or the iphone... hopefully he can make something good on those platforms...
" DON'T YOU DARE IGNORE ME, NINTENDO.
I DEMAND THE SDK- AND IF YOU DO NOT OBEY I WILL TAKE MY REVENGE, YOU MISERABLE FOOLS!"
wtf?
I really think we should boycott Nintendo.
Bob my friend, you are a hero. And Fuck every single one of you who are making fun of him. Grow the Fuck Up.
Yea it's unfortunate for him, but thousands of other developers every year go through denial, just the same way as him, and not just from Nintendo. He just chose to go crazy about it.
My good friend has been making a game for the past 3 years, and hoping that Microsoft will license it for Live Community, but he's keeping his head on straight doing it.
They might as well give them to any old pirate or homebrew maker for "research".