Since I'm rather late with my musing this month and October is upon us I've decided to lend this tale a bit of Halloween flavor. For your reading pleasure I present to you a tale of horror, a story of what happens when game saves are stored away and indefinitely forgotten. Turn your lights down low and your Silent Hill soundtracks up as I impart to you my monthly musing, Poe style.



The Save'n

Once upon a midnoon day, as I whiled the hours away,
Tidying up many a quaint and curious shelf of forgotten lore,
I spotted there upon the wrapping something that I'd been lacking,
A memory card containing my glorious adventures of yore.
"'I should totally play this again," I muttered, "play and relive my forgotten days of yore-
Only a few hours, and nothing more."

Distinctly I remember it was the past bleak December,
When last I had dusted the dust from my PS2 upon the floor.
Eagerly I found the cable;- quickly set the disc to stable
Pressed the power- the red light did glower-
Roused from its slumber for the hour-
Ah, how this game I did adore.

And the churning sad uncertain whirling of my console's burden,
Thrilled me- filled me with fantastic terrors never felt before;
So that to still the beating of my heart, I stood repeating,
"'Tis a normal sound emitting from the core-
A normal PS2 sound from within the core;-
This it is, and nothing more."

Presently my anticipation grew stronger; hesitating then no longer,
"Start," said I, "or through the window you will explore";
But the title screen then came snapping, and so gently a final scrapping,
Before the start screen appeared, tasked was I with selecting my previous chore,
Pressing "X" I prepared to see my final score;-
Darkness there, and nothing more.

Deep into that darkness peering, long I sat there wondering, fearing,
Doubting, dreaming dreams no gamers ever dared to dream before;
But the silence was unbroken, and the confirmation of my fears unspoken,
And the only word there written was the simple word, "Error!"
This I whispered, and an echo murmured back the word, "Error!"-
Merely this, and nothing more.

Back into the bedchamber turning, all my soul within me burning,
Soon again I heard a tapping somewhat louder than before.
"Surely," said I, "surely it is only a glitched status:
Let me restart the game, and this mystery explore-
Let my game save still be there, my prayer did implore";
'Twas a blank screen and nothing more.

Pulled out then the card from the clutter, the console did whirl and stutter,
Upon the case an insignificant scratch inflicted from when it had fallen underneath a drawer;
Not the least concession made I; not a minute stopped or stayed I;
But, pressed the card into the slot once more-
Pressed the restart and waited crouched upon my floor-
Awarded only the option to begin anew, and nothing more.

Then this ironic situation beguiling my saddened face into smiling,
By the grave situation it forswore.
"Though thy saves be corrupted," I said, "my gaming shan't be interrupted,
Alas, if I only knew what secrets you used to store-
Tell me what games I've saved to you that you no longer store!"
Quoth the Save'n, "Nevermore."

Much I marveled this unlikely chance to hear it speak so plainly,
Though its answer little assistance- little reassurance bore;
For we cannot help agreeing that no living human being
Ever yet was behest with speaking with a device to which games would store-
My sanity was clearly in question, I contemplated the effect of running screaming from the door,
Surely the card had not uttered "Nevermore."

But the save'n, sitting lonely in my hand, spoke only
That one word, as if its soul in that one word it did outpour.
Nothing further did it utter- while I watched feeling flustered-
Till I scarcely more than muttered, "this shit just got hardcore-
Also I should cut back on my drinking." I swore.
Then the card said, "Nevermore."

Startled at the stillness broken by reply so aptly spoken,
"Doubtless," said I, "This is merely a dream and something to ignore,
Caught from some late night snack which lead to disaster
My mind spun fast and then faster till the words one burden bore-
Till the dirges of my hope that melancholy burden bore
Of 'Never- nevermore'."

While the Save'n still beguiling I considered grabbing the phone and dialing,
Instead I took a seat in front of console and card on the floor;
Then upon the carpet sinking, I found myself thinking,
Fancy unto fancy, thinking what this ominous card of yore-
What this grim, ungainly, ghastly, gaunt and ominous card of yore
Meant in croaking "Nevermore."

This I sat engaged in guessing, but no syllable expressing
To the many hours spent endeavoring for that high-score;
The many countless adventures and skills that required refining,
Characters who's lives I followed over,
But whose stories now buried under clover ,
Game saves I would return to complete, ah, nevermore!

And the Save'n, never splitting, still is sitting, still is sitting
On the shelf of games just beside my chamber door;
A sad reminder of games forgotten,
Games I meant to come back to someday and play once more;
The final testament to the effort into my hobby I did pour
To be played again- nevermore!


Sorry for the overly exciting punctuation, I didn't have a writing program installed so it was all done on the fly and I pretty much just kept the original stuff rather than actually edit for the new content. I hope you all enjoyed it.

I'm throwing my hat into the ring and announcing my love for this site, its metallic mascot, and all you fine people who join me here day in and day out. Honestly I love you guys because you let me be part of this. I've yet to find another site where you can just jump in and be part of something fun and not always feel like the noob in the corner.

Even if I never become one of the big names on this site or manage to make it into one of the group photos everyone's flashing around, I've still managed to make some awesome buddies and have loads of fun on a weekly basis playing games and just chilling in the forums (yes we have them).

You know the saying;
"I wouldn't want to belong to any club that would have me as a member"?

Yeah, if Groucho Marx would've known about Destructoid he'd have changed his mind.

Also, the staff has a good sense of humor (reposted for you poor suckers who don't visit the forums.)





I love this place.

It's time to throw down my entry into Aborto's swag contest.

Now as a long time RPG player I have learned a few tricks when it comes to assembling the ultimate team in a game. There is a reason most RPG's use the same character archetypes in all popular games where teamwork is called for. Based on REASONS I'll be using the same method in selecting my patented “Ultimate Tag Team of Unlimited Ultimateness” (catchy isn't it?).

First, you need your hero type. This character should be able to effective in any given circumstance since he's your go to guy. Ideally a swordsman who dabbles in some magic so he's not gimped against ranged opponents.

PICK ONE : The hero

Geralt of Rivia, AkA: The Witcher

Geralt is a professional Witcher which means that he hunts and kills monsters, demons, bandits, sorcerers and other evil things for a living. Think about that, what do you do everyday, I bet you aren't out tracking werewolves and striga's are you? That kind of daily training keeps Geralt from being the slightest bit phased by any of the creepier selections others have made. No screaming in terror here, he'll just whip out a sword and go to work. Makes a great lead in character to access your opponents weaknesses.

Next, you'll need a dedicated magic user to lay down the hurt. This character has to be insanely powerful to exceed the hero's offensive power.

PICK TWO: The Mage

Jean Grey AkA: Dark Phoenix

While the lovely Miss Grey is a force to be reckoned with in her own right when she unleashes her Dark Phoenix powers she is suddenly capable of “accidentally” destroying the world. With pretty much limitless power at her disposal no other fighters would stand a chance against her. It makes perfect sense that the ultimate team would require the ultimate mutant to be complete. Done and done.

Now one could argue that my current team is already overpowered to the point of making any attempt to stop me foolish by definition. Surely allowing me to pick another teammate is unfair and will only result in tears of anguish by my already trembling opponents. Well, Aboroto demanded three team members and three he shall have.

Following my RPG trend I now require a character that is solely included for brute strength. This character requires no fancy footwork or special powers to make them a threat, as they are dangerous by their very existence. It just so happens I have the perfect choice in mind.

PICK THREE: The Brawler

Ty Rannosaurus AkA: The T Rex from DinoCrisis

Oh yes, I went there. While my team was already perfect there is one slight potential issue I've become aware of when reviewing my picks. Witchers are infamous for their insatiable libidos and Dark Phoenix isn't exactly a prude. In the off chance that during the course of the battle my first choices were to sneak off for some nooky I'd be left high and dry. Fortunately I have a fail safe backup plan in the form of the largest known land predator.

No button mashing combos needed here, the T Rex just runs around stomping and biting at everything in its path until it is good and dead. Nothing short of a well placed explosive could stop this rampaging behemoth. This is domination in its most primal form and its the final member of my “Ultimate Tag Team of Unlimited Ultimateness.”

In case your chin is still firmly planted on your chest from when it dropped earlier here's a quick recap of my team. 1. Geralt (awesome) 2. Dark Phoenix (super powerful) 3. T Rex (get in the choppa, oh wait he ATE it).

Everyone else can pack up and go home, this team wins everything. Ultimate Win!

compliments of Hooligan451

Well as the title pretty much suggests I have no real purpose in posting this blog other then the fact that It is my birthday and after some damn fine ice cream cake and a delicious Bellini I feel like celebrating with my favorite internet community.

In addition to all the warm and occasionally wet birthday wishes I got from my forum buddies I was also gifted with an awesome 1-Up cake (as seen above).

Also, in an moment of incredible awesomeness I even got an early gift from non-other then my favorite community manager, CTZ.


Spare swag is always appreciated, even if the Star Wars pin was every bit as lame as promised.

Topping off the evening I present to you all the greatest gift any gamer could ask for, compliments of dtoid's own sausage wielding prankster lv99ron.



Thanks again everyone, for letting me be part of your "cool kids club" on this, the anniversary of my birth. Now go ahead and scroll back up to see that pic again. He's single ladies ;)

This is the wave of the future

Behold the power of gamers working for a worthwhile cause. Using a bit of ingenuity and a whole slew of grants, a group of students at MIT have recently created a breakthrough device that could revolutionize the way people play World of Warcraft.

The so called WoW Pod, currently on exhibit at the MIT Museum, not only offers gamers a cozy little pod to play their favorite MMO in, while they completely shut themselves off from the outside world, but also includes a fully functioning stove and toilet. With gaming this accessible WoW players may never have to leave Azeroth again.

The exterior of the Pod mimics the game world, offering a truly immersive experience for people who already don't get out enough. So far the design is only offered in Horde style, but who knows, if this takes off like we all know it will then an Alliance adaptation can't be far behind.

I wonder if their parents think it was worth all the tuition money?

According to the press release, while in the Pod the gamer is able to select and scan their desired food items and the system will automatically set the built in hotplate to cook at the appropriate temperature. Also, the players avatar pitches in by announcing when the food is ready and automatically going “AFK” while the player eats.

Of course, any true WoW player would not bother with the trifle of going AFK while eating, you only need one hand on the mouse, but you know their hearts were in the right place when they added this.

As mentioned above all the players needs are fully catered to, including the eventual biological needs that follows all the delicious automatically catered eating. The toilet seat is located underneath the gamer's “throne” and seems to be fully functional as well. The press release doesn't mention how the waste storage/removal is handled, but these kids went to MIT so I'm sure its not as disgusting as I think it must be.

I don't see a door on that bad boy, hope you're not bashful

Basically the WoW Pod is like a twisted combination of a hardcore raiders destination vacation and a porta-potty. While I applaud their efforts this whole thing just seems like a bad idea to me. WoW players are probably the last people that need to be enabled in their gaming habits and with the number of people who become legitimately addicted to MMO's anyway do we really need to encourage them to never take breaks? Also, Horde? Yuck.

Still, the setup looks pretty slick and with an achievement like this under their belts these kids have a bright future ahead of them. They will likely have their pick of jobs in culinary arts, gaming or even biological waste management. Their parents must be so proud.

Check out more pictures of this marvel of technology at their Flicker.

My selection of completed games or even nearly completed games being rather small has left me with a shameful admission, I don't have much experience with game bosses. I've heard tales of their ueber greatness, their near god-like prowess, and most of all the nightmares they spawn when no matter what you do you just can't beat them.

For those of you who might not be familiar with Kenichi Yamada, and I'm willing to bet just about everyone fits into this group, let me tell you a little about the man who would become my great adversary.

Mr. Yamada is a family man who enjoys spending the summers at his vacation home with his wife and daughter. His job is a stressful one and he finds flower arranging to be a wonderfully relaxing past time. Nothing can sway his sunny disposition, except me.



You see in this game I'm a mosquito and it has been made perfectly clear that I only have a short amount of time to gather enough blood to last me through the hard winter months ahead. If I fail in my mission it will mean my doom. As such I can hardly be blamed for my actions.

I became acquainted with the family, though at first they didn't know I was there. A fly on the wall so to speak, I listened in on their conversations, their petty arguments and their planning. In a weird way I felt that I too was part of their family. As such surely they wouldn't mind if I took some of the sustenance that I so desperately needed.

I started off small, only taking a tank or two of any of their blood at one time. While the girl and the mother seemed to find me a bit of a nuisance I noticed that Mr. Yamada had taken an especial disliking to me.



As time wore on I realized I'd need to take more blood if I wanted to make my quota in time. By now the family had decided something must be done about me. I felt betrayed, I just wanted to live and prosper as they did. Wasn't my life worth the slight itchy inconvenience that I caused? Apparently not and a series of battles ensued.

I met with the daughter first, she had come prepared for a showdown. My shaky flight controls and tendency to collide with invisible geometry hindered me greatly in the battle. Still, I realized this was what the game had been preparing me for from the beginning. I managed to out maneuver her and make off with the necessary blood to secure my victory.

Next up was Mrs. Yamada, a formidable opponent to be sure. It took several attempts before I was able to see her go down. My confidence was bolstered by this point, what more could they throw at me? What obstacle couldn't I overcome?

I never expected Mr. Yamada to answer the call so fiercely. Driven to rage by the state of his family, still ignorant to my plight he prepared himself for the final showdown.

I readied myself and took flight, zooming around to get a better view of his weak spots, but where were they? Suddenly he spotted me and the battle began. I found his pressure points, but as I was about to dive for them something unexpected happened. The Kenichi Yamada I'd watched arranging flowers and idly flipping channels from the comfort of the couch vanished. In his place was Dragon ball Yamada.



I felt my confidence shatter instantly as he powered up his super attack. Until this time I wasn't aware such attacks existed in this game, but there it was, an energy ball bent on my destruction. I tried to swerve, tried to fly lower and higher, but it was no use. No matter where I went or how fast I dodge he found me, over and over.

My fingers grew sore and calloused on the duel joystick controls as I became increasingly erratic in my flight. The quirky level geometry that I'd thought I'd become used to now openly mocked me as I ricocheted off of walls and furniture, certain I'd never been close to it. All of the elements that had given the game such a steep and uncompromising learning curve suddenly made sense. It was all a cruel setup to make me think I had a chance.

There was no safe place to be found as Yamada rampaged after me. I'd restarted so many times, yet my efforts were entirely futile. There was no weakness in the man, the game was on his side and I would not live to see another summer.



It's a funny thing when you are resolved in your failure. When you know you've given it all you can and that the only thing left to do is to stand up so you can be struck down one last time. Once your death is imminent there is no longer reason to fear it and without that fear comes a certain clarity.

That's the only way to describe where my second wind came from, somewhere deep inside of me shouted that if I was to die then Yamada was going down with me.

His fist swung, ogre-like and seemingly slower then before as I casually dodged it and rammed right into his pressure point. He was caught off-guard for a moment and I used the time to loop myself over his shoulder and hit the second point. Shaken, he began gathering energy for his power attack, the unsurvivable one that had hitherto sent me running for cover.

I knew better then fall for that this time. There was no more running away, there was no place safe to run to, this was going to end now.

In the slow motion aftermath as the lights blurred and Yamada fell I dropped the controller, my hands throbbing from the tricky stick work I'd just performed. Somewhere in the back of my head I think I heard singing, though it could have been the onset of a headache. The title screen came up again, inviting me to play the coveted second season, that was basically the whole game over again, but with the bonuses I'd won this time around. I reached for my PS2 and turned it off.

I never played the game again. Maybe I will someday, its one of the few games that is short enough that even I can finish it, but perhaps it would be better to just hold onto my hard won victory. I don't have many, and Kenichi Yamada was a worthy opponent until the end.