I know I'm late to the party but its hard to keep your pulse on the 'Net when you are worried about the pulse of a person at the hospital. ;P

Anyways, I couldn't help but comment anyways having seen the fully unlocked character select screen for Brawl about two months ago. I am sure many of you have come across the screen, and the video it comes from, by way of Kotaku and many other places. All it took was a good look over to know it is a fake. How is it fake? Besides the obvious (character photos such as Young Link, Mewtwo, Ganondorf, Midna, etc. not being of the Brawl render style) but the simple fact that characters that ARE in the game as secret characters are missing. And as anyone can plainly see, there is no more space for anyone else, which leads to my second point being that characters NOT in the game (as of a month or so ago when I last had tabs on the fully unlocked version) as playable characters are there such as Midna, Ridley and Baby Bowser.

There are some characters there that have not been officially announced that ARE correct (I'l let you guys piece that together on your own), but the amount of Photoshop'd unplayable characters makes this an easy throwdown into the fake pile. Just look at the inconsistent art style used in the character pictures if you don't believe me - every single Brawl playable character will be rendered in the same style for the character select screen - there will be no discrepancies on the final product.

Nice try to whoever tried to pass that off as real, but you're not that good. You have been called out on shenanigans!

With No More Heroes coming out this week, I figured I'd throw together a super quick review. I wrote all this off the top of my head, so I apologize now for bad grammar, missing content and anything else I fucked up. ;P

No More Heroes is about to come out this week and I have to say - about time! This is one game I have been really looking forward to for awhile and I hope it finds its way into a lot of Wiis the next few weeks. Seriously, this is one of those games that I realize won't appeal to everyone or sell a million copies, but god damn is it right up the alley of anyone who enjoys wanton violence, Japanese culture (but from the inside looking out and outside looking in) and/or over-the-top American action films.

The story is just out there, with a nice chuck of swearing and mindless babble during the cut scenes that let you into Travis Touchdown's world. The exchanges between Travis and those he comes into contact with bounces around from serious to absurd to classic to hilarious. My favorite parts of the game, story-wise, has to be the cut scenes before and after each assassin fight - they remind me of tension-filled anime battles or a Tarantino flick with the banter - it just pulls you in and has you gnawing at the bit to get to the next assassin.

Which is important, because the game play isn't going to light the world on fire nor keep interest levels really high on its own. If you've played God Hand, this will bring back memories as its the same mix of innovation held back by poor game play decisions. Basic attacks are executed by spamming the A Button as you slash wave after wave of look-a-like baddies. Once you bring their life down to a certain mark, a giant arrow pops up above their head and you can slash with the Wii Remote to execute them in wonderfully bloody ways. Every once in awhile you'll get a slot machine to pop up and it will grant you one of a handful of special powers that add a trippy filter to the action (like slow-mo and black and white) while letting Travis just go nuts on anyone in his way. I love the one where you move super fast and everyone can be one hit killed, so there is just blood everywhere, its amazing. Now if only the game didn't deteriorate into a mindless brawler so quickly.

In-between the assassin levels, Travis can explore the open world area known as Santa Destroy. If you have played Grand Theft Auto, you should feel right at home. You can ride around on your crazy motorbike, collect money by taking odd jobs - which range from killing people to collecting coconuts and mowing lawns - which is used to pay for the entry fee to the next assassin. Quite smaller than any town since GTA made the jump to the PS2, there is enough to do that it serves as a decent catalyst to move the game forward and allow players to take in the world that Suda 51 created and all the silly shit he filled it with (just spend some time in Travis' apartment).

The presentation for No More Heroes leaves a bit to be desired, but thankfully the art direction helps pull it up a bit higher than it probably deserves. The animation and in-game cut scenes look pretty good, not Nintendo-developed good, but still above average nonetheless. Character models are nothing short of awesome, mixing eccentric with badass seamlessly. But the life is lost to much of the world, as it lacks detail and texture, becoming just some random building, some random hallway, some random mansion, etc. and so forth. And then there's the slowdown - No More Heroes generally runs at 30 FPS (I think its 30 at least), but it'll drop down when roaming around town and if too many baddies come on screen. The sound side of things doesn't find itself in as much trouble, as a solid selection of tunes and perfectly campy voice acting keep everything rolling along.

Though its far from perfect, No More Heroes is a labor of love and you feel the extra 'umph' in the areas that seem to matter most to the developers - memorable characters, off kilter storyline, violent game play and randomly stupid, laugh-out-loud moments. These will stick in your mind more than the so-so graphics and slightly boring fighting. Wii owners looking for anything mature should look directly at this game, as should anyone who just likes feeling and being badass.

Plus - you save by taking a shit - how cool is that?

Final Score - 7.5/10

I was poking around one of our game databases at work, looking to see if any random cool game had been added to the list to expect sometime down the line and I realized that our Japanese release list actually had a translated column! For months I just tried to find English words or have someone who knew Japanese tell me if the symbols meant a cool game...here a English list was just a column outside of my browser window. I can be pretty fucking dumb. ;P

What I found today nearly stopped my heart. One of the most beloved series of all-time is finally receiving some love in a new game, currently at some unknown stage of development. I have no idea if its a port of the original, a remake or a new entry in the series, I simply know its title, which cannot be mistaken for any other game or an original IP.

Literally, I'd lose my job in a heartbeat if I leaked the info - hell, I'm scared to even drop the system its coming out on. All I can say is whenever the developer drops the bomb, its going to be huge, gamers will rejoice and many may even shed tears of unexpected happiness. Literally, the gaming world may stop for a moment and all scream, 'YES!'

With that said, I pose the question to anyone who reads - if you could see one series revived from the grave, what would it be (if you want to throw out what system you'd like to see it for too, that'd be interested too)? I won't be able to confirm or deny what you post, but let's just say I wouldn't be surprised to see the series in these comments if we get enough.

God damn I hate knowing amazing things that I can't speak about. ;_;

Picked up a copy of Advance Wars: Days of Ruin today from work and thought I'd post some pictures of the packaging and a little video of me playing it for the first time (sorry for the bad filming - I used digital camera and played at the same time, double foul). Haven't really had a chance to dig into it yet, but the quick battle I played through seemed like the tried-and-true AW with some awesome, high quality new tunes (if anything, check the video below for that) and a more streamlined interface. So far so good!

Sorry for being a douche bag but I had to show it off. ^_^

If you just heard a yawn come from outta nowhere, that was from me - I just finished watching the Star Ocean 4 teaser trailer and couldn't help it. As much as I talk shit about Star Ocean, I'm sure I'll still play the game as next-gen RPGs are still hard to come by. Some douche bag kids stumble upon powers inside themselves that will somehow let the save world after a thousand cut scenes of bad anime dialog and convoluted plot points. I'm sick of beautiful as all hell graphics paired with idiotic storylines and cardboard cutout characters strung out for 40+ hours. Bah hum bug I say!

I know I'm late to the party, but I finally started playing Bioshock. Its one of those games thatr grabs your interest right away, sinks its teeth in, then slowly lets its venom sweep through your body so that you slowly but surely begin to come over its control. The story never ceases to interest me or drag me and I don't think I have ever given two shits about the story in a FPS ever. There's just something so intriguing about the idea of Rapture, an underwater city built in the 50s' for people to live away from the government's watchful eye and thievery. But what always starts out good ends in shamble (due to the human's volatile nature of course), and experiencing that, possibly at its peak of terribleness, makes for gripping narrative.

Electronic Banking Monopoly is so sweet even if the land you buy in the game is kind of lame. Who the hell thought Jacobs' Field was a landmark worthy of Monopoly? Please! ;P