(As a true Katamari Damacy fan I felt it my duty to pick this little gem up for my cell phone and at least play it for 15 minutes. Here's what I had to say)

While piloting the gaming portal on my LG VU I nearly had a heart attack as I noticed "Rolling With Katamari" from Namco Mobile. If I wasn't at work at the time I would have exclaimed from the bottom of my lungs in rapture that i finally had a game worthy enough of my hard earned $6.75. Instead I shook with intense quiet excitement as the Kilobytes downloaded the King of the Cosmos and his teeny son the Prince into my portable connection to the world. So for the next 15 minutes I was glued to my touch screen with glee, a beautiful world laid before me with the king to greet me.. What I found however was unlike my previous cosmos initiated endeavors... roll with me as I roll along with Katamari mobile..


what i hoped for was this..

what i got was...



..that

Now i dont quite know how your confangled cellular telephones work.. But I'll tell you, mine is quite the fickle pickle. Its a touch screen so honestly I have no true guarantee what I push on screen will actually equal what i want on screen. Not to mention I have rather fat thumbs despite my lack of fat on my body, so all things get complicated especially when I have to pilot without staring at what I'm pushing.. Which is the first thing I noticed when I started the tutorial, the game is controlled all by these small arrow buttons at the base of the touch screen. EXCUSE ME NAMCO, IM PRETTY SURE ITS A TOUCH SCREEN. WHY DO I NEED BUTTONS, WHEN I CAN CLEARLY TOUCH THE KATAMARI IF I SO DESIRE? But no, Namco didn't even consider the thought of making an amazing touch screen katamari title.. They ported it to the cell phones in a cookie cutter way of one size fits all.. So while I'm struggling to roll my katamari because my thick dexterous keep hitting pause instead of left, some asshole is pushing buttons and laughing in my face. LAUGHING. IN. MY. FACE.

So needless to say, I'm frustrated with this Katamari adventure, not beaten however. I continue to give it my all as if the King himself (theirselves?) was sitting with his hand on my shoulder watching me roll up the junk onto my sticky ball (Its a fantasy I've long wished for). However within minutes I was beaten, I couldnt get passed star 3 and wondered the physics of how a garden gnome, which apparently is a meter tall, could spell the difference of 1 cm. And to add more fail to the hate fire, the king doesnt even abuse the prince in this one.. SERIOUSLY?! Sure he belittles the little guy, but no "hide from father's wrath" mini game in sight..



He watches you touch yourself at night/ before you read this review/right now while you read this review/ right after you read this review



So all in all for $6.75, i GUESS "Rolling with Katamari" may be a worthy cell-game purchase. However on the katamari scale, I give it 3m/10m..