In the vein of great remakes that could have been, I give you Dig-Dug. Ever play Dig-Dug? Good old arcade game, with debuts on the NES in the late ’80s. It saw you, Dug, digging through 100 feet of earth on your search for monsters: little red orbs with masks, and the occasional dragon.

Upon finding them, you had a choice: you could manipulate the mine shafts you created to lure them to unstable boulders, crushing them in a cruel trap, or, if that doesn’t sound sadistic enough, you could stab them with your harpoon, and pump them full of air until they explode from the inside out. Once you had them pierced, you could even just let them sit there, pumping them up slowly and letting the air evacuate, toying with them until ready to deliver the ultimate prize.

This game has remarkable potential for depth and intense violence, and is begging to be remade with a modern engine, with visuals as realistic as possible. Let me take you on a journey with Dig Dug 2009: what could be.

Imagine: a man roaming through dark, unlit mines, every step perfectly calculated. He squints, but his eyes are accustomed to the dark. He’s spent half his life in these mines, but today is different. Today he isn’t looking for any walking red scuba-masks. No, they’ve been hunted to near extinction. Today, Dug’s looking for something else. He is a master of these mines. He and his clan built them, and expand them with each passing day. This is Dug’s personal site, and stability is low. Of course it’s low; there’s no time to build support structures in green dragon territory.

A thunderous crash as a wall is broken down, and, as the dust clears, through the rubble roars an immense dragon, scorching the earth in front of him with plumes of fire from his gaping maw.

Our hero, un-phased, ducks behind a boulder, waiting for his moment to strike. He sees the dragon out of breath and his grip tightens on his father’s O2-Harpoon. He knows it is a last resort, as he wants to take out this dragon the cunning way. He wants to defeat it using his mind, his resourcefulness. Most of all, he wants to be rewarded with the coveted eggplant, greatest trophy of his people in their time of famine, and this is the only way.

He jumps out from behind the boulder and emulates the mating call of the scuba-mask, the dragon’s chief prey. The dragon turns shrieking, and crashes toward Dug with all his speed. Dug turns and runs further down the shaft. The support struts lining the mine whip past his head like the many flora of a lush jungle, the green, thriving ancient homes of his people. For a moment, Dug can almost recall the feeling of the above-world’s warm kiss on his skin. He keeps running. He knows the dragon is faster. It will catch him. He does not tire. Finally, he sees it. The bright green scarf behind a loose support beam, jutting out of the wall.

Not breaking stride, he grabs hold of the beam and tears it free from the wall as he rushes by, and slows to a stop to face the dragon. The mine around him moans, and dust escapes the quivering ceiling. The dragon slows to a stop. It sees Dug now, nowhere left to run. The dragon knows this smell: there can be no doubt. This is no scuba-mask. This is a Digger. An evil smile spreads across the dragon’s face as he rears his head, foaming a now black fire all about the dark tunnel.

As the dragon’s head lifts, Dug sees it in the pouch of its neck. The red shard, still embedded in the great beast’s flesh. The tip of the great spear OxRonnin. His father’s weapon. The first spear, handed down by the gods of Tekkhna, passed down through generations, now in Dug’s fingers, save the lost shard. Gauthrang the one dragon to survive its bite stands before him now.

The mine is not one to stay its rage for drama’s sake, and has had enough. It relaxes its grip, and lets fly the boulders. Dug’s plan is almost complete, and an accidental avenging is almost done. Gauthrang lowers his proud head, and his black eyes meet with the Digger’s. As a waterfall of boulders plummets through the caverns above, darkness surrounds Dug as he screams the name of his father: “DIIIIG - DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAG!”

To be continued.