Bestiary Vol I - Destructoid

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Tim is a college student at UCSD. This is the nerdiest thing he's ever done.
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4:50 PM on 12.31.2007

Blogger's Note
This is an idea I've been playing around with. It's basically a best of catalog of the most prevalent video game enemies and their significance in games.

Bestiary Vol I:
Chapter 8, Page 34
Most Annoying Creatures

The Ice Bat:
Keesius Keesius Freezuras

It may not look like much but this is the face of pure evil

Bats bats bats bats bats. What could be more annoying than bats? In every game they make an appearance they always have the same the same properties. They're as small, and erratic as a child on caffeine, except hard as fuck to hit. Typically keep their distance, and attack once you've already made a fool of yourself desperately trying to get a hit in. They're bastards who don't live off blood but rather the humiliation of random adventurers. It's their sustenance. They are basically rats, turned into flying bullets.

Now, take these demon spawn and add the most annoying status damage you can think of, ice. Ice is the epitome of frustrating. Not only do you take damage but your stuck there helpless to anything around you, even fucking bats. It's the ultimate embarrassment. You're slowly losing life and you can't even do anything about it. Video games are about interacting but for a few seconds after being hit with ice you become as effective as a screen saver.

The Fire Bat:
Keesius Keesius Hothothot
Although not as annoying as being frozen for a prolonged period of time, the fire bat makes up for it's lack of ice by ramping up the humiliation factor. What's worse than being taken out by a flying projectile rat? I would have to say, perhaps, a flying projectile rat that's on FIRE. In the Zelda series insult is added to injury by losing your shield if you have a wooden one. What's more humiliating than having to leave a dungeon to buy a new shield, only to have it burnt up again?

Storekeeper: Another shield? Damn that's the fifth one.
Link: (mumble mumble) fucking bats (mumble)

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