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hello i am Sir Howard Stringer
tacobelltaco | 1:19 PM on 11.04.2009 8 comments


Hi! My name is Sir Howard Stringer.! I'm a completely ordinary teenage boy from San Diego, California. My interests include soccer, surfing, writing poetry, and luge. I am homeschooled by my father who fought in the Korean War and was exposed to nerve gas. He is kind of crazy but I still love him. We got the Internet two years ago and I started making new friends on Yahoo! messenger. Surprisingly, most of these new friends were older men who wanted to have illegal, underage sex with me. Needless to say, I got a boner like a rocketship and cybersex quickly became my favorite thing in the entire world. Wait, did I say boner like a rocketship? I meant my vagina got as wet as Lake Titicaca. I started saving all of the hot chat sessions I was having with the Pakistanis, lesbians, child molesters and other monsters who were instant messaging me all day and all night, and I decided to put them up here on this website so you can see exactly how disgusting the entire human race is. Since then, I have been in a waterskiing accident that mangled my genitals beyond repair, been diagnosed with cerebral palsy, brain cancer, and Crohn's disease, learned to speak Urdu and French, covered my naked body in superglue, went to French lesbian camp, made a Hindu eat a roast beef sandwich out of my vagina, and ruined perfectly good cybersex for at least one hundred people. Use the menu above to find out more about me and start reading my sexy adventures,





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7 comments | showing # 1 to 7
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Yashoki's Avatar - Comment posted on 11/04/2009 13:28
Yashoki
Go away. Thank you.
Anonymouse's Avatar - Comment posted on 11/04/2009 13:41
Anonymouse
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

Obvious troll is obvious.
galagabug 's Avatar - Comment posted on 11/04/2009 13:43
galagabug
this belongs in the 'homeschooled children with mutilated genitals' thread on the forum.
GoldenGamerXero's Avatar - Comment posted on 11/04/2009 13:53
GoldenGamerXero
@galagabug

If that isn't an actual thread someone needs to make one.
Quantum Zombie's Avatar - Comment posted on 11/04/2009 18:46
Quantum Zombie
Truly we are humbled in the sight of such a divine intellect.
Nicojay2's Avatar - Comment posted on 11/05/2009 08:00
Nicojay2
This is plagiarism. Isn't this drivel originally the work Wiisucks or whoever the fire engine fetishist was?

Also mighty putty is a rip-off.
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