My Client: Dr. Wily - Destructoid

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Currently playing: Borderlands, Magna Carta II, Fable II, and Bioshock.
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2:04 PM on 12.23.2009

Having been a paralegal now for a few defense attorneys for around 6 years now, I've always wondered what it might be like if certain videogame villains had to be represented in an actual court of law. What motions would I prepare? What might our defense be? How could we explain any of this to a jury? I decided today that I wanted to start a series dedicated to treating iconic videogame characters as if they were clients here at my office. Every so often I will prepare a different court document prepared in the fashion of an attorney representing a client, this week's client being Dr. Wily. Because I can't format a proper motion in bbcode, I've saved the actual document as a jpg. Hope it's easy enough to read.

Admittedly, this one isn't as funny as I'd have liked it to be, but I tend to sit on ideas for a while and then never use them. Doing it now kinda forced the idea and will make me come up with new & better ideas. A Sentencing Memorandum is filed prior to sentencing, after a defendant has pleaded guilty to a crime. The judge can use the memorandum as a kind of primer for sentencing. It generally puts the sentencing argument in the judge's head a few days before they actually hear it. Giving them some time to sleep on your argument usually results in a more favorable sentence.


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