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10:45 AM on 08.13.2011

The Plight of the Avatar- YOU CAN HELP! ADOPT NOW!

Hello, mister. My name is rexwolf2's avatar, and I don't have no parents. Will you be my daddy or mommy? I'm a good boy, I swear!


THIS IS A PLAGUE THAT IS SWEEPING THE NATION. LITERALLY DOZENS OF ORPHANED AVATARS ROAMING THE STREETS OF DESTRUCTOID WITHOUT A WAY TO GET TO PAX. HOWEVER, YOU CAN NOW HELP!

With this new blog post, you can finally reduce the number of abandoned avatars by one! If you order right now, you, yes, you can become the proud parent of rexwolf2's avatar! Now, you may ask the question, "Why should I adopt this scrawny little bugger?" Well, I shall tell you very shortly.

...Right about now.

...Aaaaany second here...

All right! Here we go!

- He is a knight, and has all of the skills that come with it. Need protection from a crazed cosplayer? He is your man! Want to be swept off of your feet by a dashing man mounted on a horse? He can do that, too! Finally, he is rdmarkably deadly with both sword and crossbow. Y'know, just in case.

- He has a Triforce! Not just "a" Triforce, though, the Triforce! That's right! With other avatars, you might only get power and wisdom. Hell, you could be left with one that only has courage! But not here! You get the whole shebang! You heard me right, power, wisdom, and courage for the low, low price of free!

- Unlike my previous avatar, which was simply a Hylian crest, this fella is a 100 percent genuine original work, made by the (in?)famous Fame Designer. Speaking of him, where has he been? Haven't seen that guy in ages.

- Unlike me, he doesn't get off track.

- If you adopt him, you will be given the gift of a child's joy. Not me of course. Or him. If he gets adopted, I'm going to give a child ice cream. That is, as far as you guys know.

- If you don't adopt him, I swear, I will hold my breath until he does get adopted. Or pass out.

- He knows thousands of jokes. Many of them for any situation you may run into. There are even several that aren't offensive to the majority of the world's population.

- He makes some KICKASS peanut butter and jelly sandwiches.


Another satisfied customer.
DISCLAIMER: THIS MAN IS NOT ME.

- Did I mention he was a knight? I mean, look at that armor, fellas!

And finally,

- OH PRETTY PLEASE DEAR GOD TAKE THE AVATAR WITH YOU TO PAX!



Begging and pleading and bad jokes aside, I simply ask that you take this humble avatar to PAX. After his early attempt at adoption back in the days when he was a Hylian crest, he's always been quite sad when PAX rolls around. (Wait, is this the first PAX since then? I still stand by my words.) Bottom line, he's a swell guy, and you are also swell guys. Swell guys should stick together. I look forward to my avatar seeing you all at PAX!   read


11:11 PM on 07.27.2011

1st birthday- Or, how I learned to stop worrying and love the Destructoid blog.

It has been a year since my first blog. How do I start, and what do I say? Destructoid has become such an amazing part of my life, I don't know what I'd be like if I hadn't found it? I guess it would be best to start by talking (once again) about how I came to this wonderful site.

The year was 2010. The game was Super Mario Galaxy 2. I was obsessed with that game. Pre-launch, I was scouring the net daily, looking for every piece of news, every preview, every opinion article, and even more. One day, I came upon an article on a site called Destructoid. I had read another piece or two of information on the site, and so I decided to take a little look around. My first impression of Destructoid was that it was a bit odd; it was different from other sites. What was with that robot mascot, anyway? While searching the front page for other interesting tidbits, I came across an article about Robopon, a shameless copy of Pokemon. I read it. I was hooked. I read every other Off-Brand Games article. I realized that Destructoid was a pretty awesome site, so I stuck around. It was in the pre-E3 madness that I finally realized that Destructoid would be my home.

The man- Chad Concelmo. The article- THIS. Zoo animals predicting E3. I was floored. It was glorious. This Chad man was just so AMAZING, and the animals were adorable. I soon created a user profile, using the name that I always used on the internet. I was a foolish boy, commenting like an idiot, thinking I was telling off whiners and trolls. This went on for a while, until one fateful night.

It was dark. It was in a park. I was on break from a community production of The Wizard of Oz, and there was wireless. Utilizing said wireless, I wrote a pretty bad intro post on my Zune and posted it. I didn't know how, but I got friendly reactions from the community, including Occams, who scared me a little bit back then.

I then decided to cut to the chase and fly over the rest of my early blogging. I had a one-part "series," another series that most people only came to for trivia (and I don't blame them), and a monthly musing or two. I was making plenty of friends, but my big break came in the middle of December.

Inspired by Elsa, I wrote an interview with Link, and was astonished by the reaction after it went live. After that, it seems like my blogging has been doing very well. I have the perpetually delayed Rex, PI series, and one of my favorites to write, RandomWolf. That's not the end of it, though. I've also done a few monthly musings, a silly blog responding to a prompt provided by mrandydixon after he won the trivia contest, and one more, my favorite of all: my interview with Matt Taranto, creator of Brawlinthefamily, my favorite webcomic.

In addition to the blogs, I have to give a shoutout to the Outer Heaven crew and the Chill Bros. Both places, I went in, not knowing what I'd expect, but I was welcomed with open arms, and I mean open. I often waste away hours at a time in chat, and that's one of the reasons that I've been slacking on the blog. Also, I need to find time to visit Mash Tactics again. I haven't been on Justin.tv in ages. I also joined the forums, but I can never stay in a forum environment for long before I stop visiting. Anyway, I'm getting off topic. Now for the part where I talk about why I love you guys.

You've introduced me to so many new things. You've recommended excellent TV shows, movies, and games. You people (Especially Law) got me hooked on anime and manga. I've listened to many an amazing album (and I've also listened to Kid A), and most importantly, I've made friends, who are what really make the Dtoid experience. The one thing that really drew me in after I began to blog was how nice you guys are. I still say that to this day. If you aren't a terrible writer, you will find a home here. Every person is an interesting fella with a story to tell, and almost every person is, in their own way, quite awesome.

I have to give a shoutout to a few people here, who were and continue to be important parts of Destructoid for me.

Lawofthermaldynamics, Occams Electric Toothbrush, mrandydixon, HandsomeBeast, Fame Designer, Talia, SteezyXL, vApathyv, T3HM0RR0W, the entire Outer Heaven crew, gennhaver and Max, everybody who follows me on Twitter, and nearly everybody who's commented on my blogs: I love you guys. You're an amazing group of people, and I'm very much the better for having met you.

I hope to continue to contribute to this marvelous community in the future and forever. Have this picture, I made it in Microsoft Paint on a laptop.

  read


11:58 AM on 07.06.2011

RandomWolf2 has missed you all so much.

Hi. How are you? I'm fine. It's been a while, hasn't it? I know it has, and I have missed you so, Cblogs. I really mean it. What? Who told you about me running off with Chat? No, we are strictly friends an- How dare you call chat a slut! You know that you are my one true love. Really. To show how much you mean to me, have some roses.

Rambling with roses
Or, sorry, but the only roses I could find came with an odd woman.


Roses. Roses are red, violets are blue, something something something, and I love you. Barney is a dinosaur, and he has a very diverse group of friends, does he not? I wish I were Occams. I have the feeling that he would be able to say something marvelously hilarious relating to those children. Like about the hidden valley ranch, home of cannibals who eat people, but only after they drench them in ranch sauce. Wow, that was pretty dark. You know what else is dark? Space. Like the Hitchhiker's Guide. I'm trying to find a copy of Dirk Gently, also by Douglas Adams, but it is hard. Boner joke. I like mrandydixon, but he gets more shoutouts on Podtoid than me, and Max said he would give me some sort of shoutout, even if... My mind train just derailed. Choo choo. That is enough, I believe. I love you folks. Now to begin, with some...

Street Fighter IV 3D
Or, the game that, by some act of god, I am not yet tired of

Not pictured: Street Fighter IV

Like I said, I am very surprised that I am not tired of Street Fighter IV 3D. After having it as my only 3DS game for a few months, and having logged impressive playtime, my enthusiasm for it has only started to dip in any way recently, but that is far from saying that I am tired of it. With the time I've put into it, it's only natural that I've developed a few favorite characters. Among them is M. Bison, who was actually one of the first guys I considered a favorite, but he went by the wayside once I decided to get real, due to the fact that I couldn't use charge characters, but I can now, so it's all good, which leads me to my next main guy, and possible favorite: Guile. I love him dearly, and I have made it a point to put on his sunglasses during every match, which has actually lost me a few rounds. You know what else I've been playing?

Ocarina of Time 3D
Or, The Legen- Wait for it... DARY of Zelda


What can I say about this game? It's excellent. The new visuals and 3D effect truly work wonders. The big skultullas actually look more like spiders now, Link is looking snazzy, and the Goron Ruby floating out of the screen and rotating is something I could watch for ages. Ages. What really impressed me was the boss fight with Barinade. Previously a forgettable boss, at least to me, the anemone thing is exhilarating to fight in 3D, what with electricity flying at you and the thing spinning all around the room. Finally, Dead Hand is still scary as hell.

Anime Mania!
Or, be prepared for a deluge of mini-reviews.

Since my last blog, I have watched a lot of anime. A lot. So now I'll review a few of the things that I watched, starting with...

FLCL

What can I say about this show? It may be one of the most certifiably insane amines I have yet seen, second only to Bobobo-Bo Bo-Bobo, which may overdo the insanity a slight bit too much. One never knows the entirety of what is going on in this show, and I love it. It's not every day that you see robots come out of somebody's forehead, y'know. Hell, they even acknowledge in one of the later episodes that nothing makes sense. Great show, you should watch.

The Big O

Imagine Batman. Now imagine giant robots. Put them together, and you've got this show. With some pretty slick style and characters that I really like, The Big O is not bad at all. Giant robot battles galore in this show. However, the second season isn't as good as the first, and the end is a confusing jumble of things that nobody understands. Despite that, it's another good show.

Durarara!!

What can I say? By the same guys as Baccano!, Durarara!! is a great anime, one of my very favorites. There are too many plot lines to sum up with one description, but expect color gangs, a headless biker, and much, much more. Like Baccano!, there are plenty of characters, but it's a bit different. The characters are deeper, but not as likeable. That's not a bad thing, though. There are still plenty of excellent characters, such as Simon the black Russian sushi chef, and Shizuo Heiwajima, who is strong. Oh so very, very strong. Seriously, you have no idea how strong he is. Also, watch out for all of the Baccano! references! Watch this anime NOW.

I think that I shall save the rest of my anime reviews for a later post. Instead, it is time for...

For Lack of a Better Kid (A)
Or, some techno music followed by "Computers having sex"


Coming from the lovely vApathyv, we have an album by Deadmau5, For Lack of a Better Name. I'm relatively new to this genre, so bear with me, men. First, let me say that this album starts out magnificently with "fml," exhibiting a sick "beat drop," as I am told the term is. (God, I sound like an old white guy trying to be "hip." (Damn, I did it again.)) After that come my two favorite songs, "Moar Ghosts N Stuff" and "Ghosts N Stuff." Moar Ghosts N Stuff starts out with amazing use of dialog from an old B (possibly C) movie, and stays excellent from there. Oh, the violins! Ghosts N Stuff continues, with some pretty good vocals to go along with the music. Sadly, after the following track (Hi Friend!), my interest in the music started to wane. The songs that followed simply weren't nearly as exciting to me, and my enjoyment suffered. That isn't to say that the songs were bad, though. The beginning four just gave ridiculously high expectations. The album does pick up again near the end, which pleases me.
Rex Rating: Quite excellent (For the first four: AMAZING)

Hoo boy. This next album, Kid A by Radiohead, is a bit of a debated subject here, at least between Occams and Law, the latter of which loves it. The former thinks that it sounds like computers doing the nasty. I'm somewhere in between. The main problem with the album is this: A focus on creating dissonance and using computer noises instead of making some goddamn simple music. Also, many of the songs seemed to lack purpose and drive. Several of them start out pretty well, only to fall prey to the general theme of the album. Funnily enough, the song that renewed my optimism halfway through was titled "Optimistic." That and "Idioteque" are the only songs that I can claim as favorites. They had drive and didn't fall prey to dissonance. Well, Idioteque did, but only near the end. Despite all of my slagging off on the album, it was alright. However, the final song is about six minutes or so long, most of which is silence. WHAT. THE. FUCK, Radiohead?
Rex Rating: Mixed bag. Pretty good but disappointing.

RANDOM
Or, everything you wanted to know about me, but was too short for its own area.

I love crispy hash browns. With a passion. A sweet, sweet passion.

Do you fellas know how hard it is to find good sushi where I go for vacation? I have to go to the *shudder* ...grocery store. It's not even worth it.

I watched Tron: Legacy yesterday, and it was pretty good. Cool special effects, but fairly unimpressive story, with a spoiler involvng a character that I saw miles away. Not bad for a movie of its type, but nothing amazing.

I just started Eden of the East. More shows need to start with naked amnesiacs holding guns in front of the White House. I'm liking it so far.

I've been reading a decent amount of manga recently, but my favorite of the ones I'm reading at the moment is Yostsuba&! (Yotsubato!). It follows an odd little girl, her father, and her neighbors. It's adorable, heartwarming and funny.

Like Xzyliac said in Commentoid, you should get a Twitter if you don't have one already. I consider Twitter to be one of the best parts of Dtoid. You know my music reviews and the anime I watched? Wouldn't have watched them and listened to it if I wasn't on Twitter.

It's good to be back.   read


8:32 PM on 06.03.2011

RexwolfTrivia is back!

Hey, it's been a while since I've posted trivia, hasn't it?
(The answer is yes.)

Anyway, the battle for the blog is back, and let's go over the rules, shall we?

First to answer wins a point.
Google is allowed.
First to five gets to send me a prompt for a special blog, much like this blog.

Let's get to the point totals, shall we?

1 point each for SoJTuna (when was the last time anybody saw him?), the dashing Lawofthermaldynamics, the charming Smurfee McGee, and the accurately namedHandsomeBeast!

2 for DynamoJoe, who I also haven't seen in a while!

And 4 for the illustrious Occams Electric Toothbrush!

Now let's get going!



So, I've been playing through Super Mario RPG, and if you didn't already know, it's a swell game! Anyway, earlier today I was playing, and fell victim to my common mistake of not saving in between what will obviously be a set of two-in-a-row boss fights. The first fight was a pretty regal-looking dragon. And now it's time for...

REXWOOOOOOOOOOLLLLLFFFF... TRIVIAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!

The second fight was against these fellas. Name their group/club/organization/alliance.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNDDDD...

GO!   read


3:36 PM on 05.24.2011

P2 Press Start: Make Believe

This month’s musing topic is multiplayer. Like nearly everybody else, I have had countless amazing and fun times playing multiplayer games. However, the most fun I had was when I didn’t play by the rules- of the game, that is. Instead, my friend and I made new rules, creating new games. Now, I’m not talking about a local metagame, such as when my friends banned me from using the Rayfall in Custom Robo. (I was somehow winning while using it) I’m talking about make-believe, using games for playtime, creating new stories.

Now, without this friend, it’s unlikely that I’d even be on Destructoid. He’s the main reason that I’m such a humongous Nintendo fanboy. He and I could not get enough- Kirby, Smash Bros, Pokemon, you name it! We would have lightsaber fights in his backyard, and then he would play the Pokemon Gold/Silver bike theme on the piano. (A tune that he still maintains to be one of the catchiest ever. Trust me, I did my research.) Simply put, a great pal. (Who I may be embarrassing right now. Sorry, buddy!)



One series that we both adored was Smash Bros. We have spent countless hours with each installment. You may know some of the special variants such as giant, speedy, and so on, but we took it upon ourselves to create our own variants. The first, and one of my favorites, was called Star Wars: Beam Swords and nothing else. Being one of my favorite weapons, that mode was a blast. Another mode, 007, allowed only for the use of guns, and if I remember correctly, proximity mines. Another of my favorites was the Pokemon battle: Pokemon Stadium, each keeping to their own side, using nothing but Pokemon. When Brawl came along and we suddenly had soccer balls and a new Pokemon Stadium level, we knew what had to be done: deadly soccer, with no touching of the other player allowed at all.

Another mode that I remember dearly is a different style of soccer that we played, still on Pokemon Stadium, but this time in Melee. The setup: Stamina mode, three characters, two players. Remember how the dead bodies in stamina mode would just lay there, able to be pushed around? Well, we played soccer with them. It was a game that was a bit difficult, easy to mess up, and quite a bit silly. It was also a complete blast.



Anybody remember Kirby Air Ride? I know I do; I’ve even written a complete blog on it. Another question: Who remembers City Trial? Okay, good. Finally, who ever played City Trial free run? I don’t blame you. Playing it was often extremely boring. Other than trying out different stars, there was very little to do there. That is, if you weren’t my buddy and me. Somehow, we found ourselves regularly playing it for over an hour a sitting. We probably accumulated days worth of playtime on it over the years.

So, how did we do it? We would divide the available stars between us, putting them in a few categories. (Regular, bulky, speedy, etc.) Then, we took them to our secret bases. I usually took the cave beneath Wispy Woods, and he took the floating island in the sky. Then, the game would commence.

We would ride around, joust, go on visits to the other’s base, and occasionally cause a bit of mischief by stealing vehicles. Eventually, we started giving ourselves “jobs.” It may sound boring to the rest of you, but these sessions were some of the most fun I had playing video games.

Eventually, we started to form a story. It was an epic tale, spanning multiple regions and involving (as usual in the Kirby universe) a dark force causing trouble. As time went on, we were sure that we had created something awesome.

Speaking of segues, this friend wasn't my only buddy with an overactive imagination. Years ago, when Halo 2 was still a "cool" thing to play, we had just come off of a lengthy viewing of Red vs. Blue. Partly inspired, partly just bored with running around and killing each other, we set out to make our own story. With one friend controlling most of the plot, we spent hours doing this, going to nearly every multiplayer level the game had to offer. If you asked me today, I wouldn't be able to tell you anything that happened in it. What I can tell you is that it was fun.

To have fun playing a game with a friend, you don’t need the best multiplayer mode ever (though it does help). You don’t need elevated strategy and skill. You don't even need to compete. All you need are awesome friends and a little bit of imagination.

  read


2:17 PM on 05.11.2011

Rex, PI: The Informant

Rex, PI is a series that I won't blame you if you don't know. With a long gap between every single installment, many people have either forgotten about it, or weren't around for the last one. You can read the story so far right here, and please do. The main reason that I'm writing this is because I love the community so much (and I rarely get a chance to flex my creative writing bone like this.) Anyway, here comes part four! Enjoy!


After a diligent search for the hotel Mario pointed me to (begging for help from one of the locals), I finally came across a small inn staffed by Toads (as I later learned they were called). As I walked in, I saw a man clad in green, waiting there. Strangely enough, he was clad almost identically to Mario.

“You must-a-be Rex. Mario sent me a message and told me all about you. I’m-a-Luigi. His brother. Come, let’s-a-go to my house.” I ended up staying at the Mario residence, and during my time there, I familiarized myself with all of the different species of the Mushroom Kingdom.

Attention to detail is vital in my line of work, so I learned the names and quirks of all of the different creatures quickly. Many of them, especially the humanoid Toads, were quite friendly to the royalty, but I learned that many of the stranger creatures enlisted in Bowser’s service by the bucketload. Scratch that, buckets are a bit small for what I’m describing. It soon became obvious that outside of the Mario brothers, the royal family, and me there was not a single human to be found in the Mushroom Kingdom.

It didn’t take me long to adjust to life in the kingdom, but that didn’t mean it was easy. The cuisine was like nothing I had ever seen, with a certainly unhealthy reliance on mushrooms and honey for sustenance. This strange place had a few advantages, though. Even the smallest nap seemed to energize me completely, putting even the best night of sleep back home to shame.

Being a new human, it was hard to lay low, and I was soon the talk of the town. Thanks to my skills, the interest soon died down. I put every fiber of my being into seeming as uninteresting as possible, which seemed to fool the denizens of the kingdom. On the flipside, those fellas will never cease to intrigue me.

After about a week, it was time. As Mario said, the slip contained the address of a party. Though I usually abhor the things, having never been invited to one for some reason, I kept my emotions from interfering and prepared myself for a meeting with the informant.

Expecting a detailed description of the informant, I was surprised when the other side of the paper said nothing but this: Look-a for the Lakitu. You will-a know him when you-a see him.

It appears that Mario even carries his strange speech patterns over into writing. Slightly disappointed, a smile once again reached my face when I realized that this was a prime opportunity to use my detective’s intuition.

Dressed in my finest for the party, I set out for the mansion of a certain Toad, whose name I did not know, but he seemed to be of very high standing in the community. Upon opening the doors, I was greeted by a huge throng of Toads as far as the eye could see. A few small groups of Koopa were to be seen mixed in, and Shy Guy waiters served the hors d'oeuvres.

After mingling for about an hour, and greatly the food provided by the (supposedly) famous chef Tayce T… (Such amazing stuff! Honeyed mushroom, slices of cake, a delicious “special dish,” and so much more! I stayed clear of the Whacka Bumps, though. Animal cruelty takes no part in the food that I eat. Except for beef. I love beef. I can’t resist chicken either, and OKAY! I just thought they looked odd! Anyway, what was I saying? Ah, yes! The informant!) After about an hour, I saw him across the room: The informant.

He was betuxed lakitu (with a dashing forehead, I must say) riding upon a blue cloud, who seemed to be worried for some reason. Yes, this man was definitely the informant.

Discreetly making my way across the room, I soon ended up next to the mysterious man. “Hey,” I said, “The name’s-“

“Rex, I know.” Interjected the creature, shocking me greatly. I have spent years perfecting my introduction, and to have it interrupted is simply rude. “You can call me Lawkitu. This fella here is my buddy Beyamor.”

“So I hear you know about the-“

“Pianta family, yeah.” He did it again! “I’ve worked my way up, and I’m tight with the don. I’ve heard a few things about the princess mentioned but nothing concrete. That is what you’re here about, right?”

“Yeah, it is. So that’s all you have? No more infor-“

“But I have noticed that the boss has been on the edge lately.” This is getting ridiculous! “Rumor has it that the princess has been cracking down on the mob’s activities lately. The hammer smuggling operations have been nearly shut down, and I’ve heard that the mushroom operations might have been next.”

“Mushrooms? But they’re all over the place! Why smug-“

“Poison mushrooms. Very rare. Very potent. There are countless wannabe assassins and criminals that want their hands on ‘em.”

Then, the cloud piped up. “Law, wouldja stop butting in on this guy? I can tell that it’s annoying him.”

“Bey, I thought you said you were gonna be quiet during this.”

“Well, excuse me. I’m just trying to help. Anyway, I don’t want to be included as a one-time joke without any lines, now do I?”

Puzzled, I continued to listen as Lawkitu got angry.

“Bey, what have I told you about breaking the fourth wall? I thought we’ve been over this! Aw hell, now you’ve got me doing it!”

This ridiculous bickering, none of which I understood, continued for about a minute. After the storm subsided, Lawkitu turned to me again and resumed talking. "The Pianta family must have become fed up with the Princess's meddling, and decided to take her away. They wouldn't kill her, of course. To do that would turn the entire kingdom against them, and while they run quite a bit of the country, they couldn't go up against everybody else unscathed. Anyway, there are still plenty of fellas in the organization with a fierce loyalty to the royal family. I'm afraid that I can't help you any more. I don't see anything that you can do to save the princess."

"Wait, who said anything about saving? I'm just a detec-"

"The princess must be saved. The Piantas won't give her up, and just between you and me, Mario's getting a bit old."

"Wait, what does Mario have to do with this? I thought he was just a plumber."

Lawkitu then proceeded to tell me tales of Mario's exploits, with frequent additions from Beyamor. Taking it all in stride, I picked up my jaw from the ground. With this information, I started to walk away, puzzled as to what my next move should-

"WAIT!" It was Beyamor.

"What is it, Bey?" He must have had some juicy information to stop me in such a rude and dramatic way.

"There is one way that you might be able to get the princess back: Bowser."

Lawkitu became furious. "Bowser? He's the worst person to go to for this! He kidnaps the princess at least once a year!"

"True," Bey said calmly, "But he's also helped Mario plenty of times. His enormous ego won't let anybody else kidnap the princess. It may be risky, but he's your best shot."

"Thanks, Bey." With that, I turned away. As I walked out of the party and into the cool nighttime air, my head was filled with even more thoughts than before. However, I knew one thing: I needed to save the princess, and I needed Bowser's help to do it.

-------------End of part 4--------------   read


4:45 PM on 05.06.2011

RexwolfTrivia: I kinda said I'd do several this week, didn't I?

Oops. Anyway, to the points!

1 point each for SoJTuna, Lawofthermaldynamics, Smurfee McGee, and HandsomeBeast!

2 for DynamoJoe!

And 3 for Occams Electric Toothbrush!

You know the rules, and you know what you're fighting for. On to the post!



I have been stuck for quite a while in The Legend of Zelda: A Link to the Past. I have been stuck on the ice palace, and it's been a month or two by now. I should really just give in and get tips from a walkthrough or YouTube on how to figure the part out, but I'm a stubborn sumbitch. Speaking of horrible segues, it's time for...

REXWWOOOOOOLLLLLFFFFFF... TRIVIAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!

What is the special item that may be found in the ice palace?

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNDDDD...

GO!   read


5:43 PM on 05.02.2011

RandomWolf2: The Gritty Reboot

So, we here at Rex software have decided that, even though you fellas love RandomWolf, it needs a reboot to appeal to today's children. So, expect fewer colors, less Nintendo, and hard rock to replace the planned jazz and chiptune for this edition's music. Also, it will feature a younger, angsty Rex. Enjoy!

Champions: The first word I saw
Random Thoughts are back with a vengeance!


Champions. We are the champions is a Queen song, which I don’t especially care for anymore due to overexposure to it, which is the same with We Will Rock you. I like Queen a lot. They can rock hard, or be light and airy, often within the same song (Innuendo is an amazing example of this). One of my favorite parts of that song is the Spanish guitar. I speak limited Spanish, and so does Talia Edit: That was phrased badly. Talia is a native Spanish speaker. . Hi Talia! Does anybody else speak Spanish? I really haven’t seen many people on chat recently. I tried to talk to what’s-his-face with cutter Kirby as an avatar (sorry, I can’t remember your name right now and I’m typing really quickly!) this weekend, but I don’t know where he went, because he never continued the conversation. The continue screen is something I see relatively often in Street Fighter IV when I’m playing arcade mode. I love the 3DS, it’s pretty nifty and I’m a bit worried about Cave Story 3DS, because the screens have been mixed with whether I like them or not and my mind is just blank right now- I like bagels! I had a plain bagel straight up the other day, and it was great! A bit of it was charred so I had to throw it out, though. Okay, now I feel like finishing. I’m going to go get a bagel.

Edit: Sorry, Venus! I got your name mixed up with somebody else’s, and couldn’t untangle my mind. Here are some cookies to make up for it.

Doctor Horrible
Or, an attempt to once again siphon votes from Whedon fans. (And possibly PixelSith64)


Do you like musicals? Neil Patrick Harris? Joss Whedon? Super heroes and villains? Wait, what? None of those? What do you mean I'm asking too many questions? You're one to talk. I don't see how you can dislike all of those things. Anyway, now that that's over, I'll chat about Doctor Horrible's Sing-Along Blog. Quite a few factors contribute to me considering it one of the best things ever. It tells the story of a villain who is really a pretty nice guy, his superhero nemesis who is kind of a dick, and a philanthropic woman who is the object of affection. The cast is fantastic, and each person fits their parts marvelously. Catchy songs with great lyrics are helped by the great singing voices of the main characters. The entire thing just feels genuine and heartfelt. You will laugh, cry, and sing along- and I sound a bit too much like an advertisement. Just watch Doctor Horrible, okay? You won't regret it.

Games, games, games!
Or, what I've been playing.


This baby showed up as a 620x350 image. It was too adorable not to use.

Super Mario RPG is a game that I've been playing, and I couldn't be very much happier with it! While it may be the precursor to every other Mario RPG, I find it to be one of the best, if not the best! The battle system is fun, and landing an attack right is extremely rewarding. Add in funny dialog, cool characters, and snazzy graphics, and you've got yourself a winner! Possibly one of my favorite parts is the grind-friendly nature of death- you get to keep all of your experience! There's one part right before a boss where that can be majorly abused, and abuse it I did. I never said I was perfect!

Super Metroid is another game that is quite excellent, and I've been making slow progress in it. The gameplay is still excellent, and the boss fights continue to be superb as well. Unfortunately, I wasn't able to utilize the cool grappling beam method of killing Draygon that Chad featured in The Memory Card.

What I've probably been playing the most is Super Street Fighter IV: 3D Edition. Such an excellent game, it is. As I continue to play, I find more and more secrets and strategies that help me improve myself. I also find it amazing that nearly every character I've played as feels badass and powerful. Right now, I have a small hit list going of people that irk me. Ibuki, Adon, and Hakan could really go without their voice boxes, and I have to give C. Viper brownie points for calling Hakan annoying during her rival fight with him. Not long ago, I played a few matches online with SteezyXL, who claimed to be "rusty." It was quite fun, and marks the first time I've played anything against a Dtoider. Final note: While you're supposed to do trials to improve your skills, I'm mostly just doing it for the adorable cartoon-head icons that you can unlock for each character by beating 16 levels.

The Law Corner
Or, you brought this upon yourself, Matt.


Lawofthermaldynamics, you've given me so many things to talk about, they need their own section. Here goes!

You may remember Law's blog about Lucifer and the Biscuit Hammer, and I know I do. Because of this recommendation, I checked it out, and found myself enjoying it immensely. I do not read much manga, but I know good stuff when I read it, and Lucifer is good stuff. You can read Law's blog for more information about it, but I'm going to post my thoughts about it here. The plot is amazing and well-paced, and I always was clamoring for more information about the characters, backstory, and everything else that was to come. The characters are excellent, and every one is important in their own way. Even those that I didn't initially like, I came around to understand and enjoy. Also, the fights are amazing.

[embed]200222:38148[/embed]

Baccano! is another thing that I enjoyed. Having remembered that Law liked it, I looked it up on Netflix, and lo and behold, it was there! From the very beginning of the opening (which I included above), I was laughing, and easily fell in love with the series. While the number of characters may seem intimidating, by the end I knew every single one, each of whom had a unique story to tell. The period setting of the 1930's goes amazingly with the soundtrack, which is quite fun, indeed. Now for my favorite part of the series: Isaac and Miria. The two lovable thieves may possess the intelligence of children, but they are just as lovable and optimistic as them, too. Nearly every seen they're in is hilarious, and they made the show for me. Watch Baccano!

Just this weekend I read The Importance of Being Earnest on Law's recommendation, and it is brilliant! Extremely witty and funny (the muffins stand out, in addition to any mention of Bunburying), the play by Oscar Wilde is a must-read, for any fan of literature.

Finally, I cracked a joke on Twitter (follow me @Rexwolff2!) yesterday about him giving me fashion tips, to which he replied that red was in this year. When I opened my dresser drawer this morning, the first thing that I saw was a red shirt. The man is a genie, I tell you!

Supply of Blue
Or, I lied. Here's the regularly planned musical selection.


It's no secret that I love Anamanaguchi, but this is the first time that I've ever been able to review one of their albums, which I am excited to do. Power Supply is their first album, released for free online, which I didn't know until I Googled it about a week ago, resulting in an instant download. Being their first album, I expected a little bit less polish and shine than what I was used to, and while that came true, the music blew me away. Each song is unique, and has something to say. Fast Turtle, for instance, has a great melody, which is made even better by a sudden and effective slowing of tempo in the final third of the song. While all chiptune sounds somewhat like it's from a game, Airbase sounds especially so, and I am genuinely sad that it isn't in one. The last song that I will analyze, Flora/Fauna is a beautiful and fluid tune, which I find to be more genuine and natural than most music made with "conventional" instruments. At seven songs long, it's a bit short, but well worth the memory it takes up.
Rex Rating: About this level of AMAZING!

Kind of Blue, from the great Miles Davis, was recommended to me by KRA1D after I admitted that I had no jazz in my collection. Upon download, I found myself listening to a real gem of an album, with great songs that, for once, I could use purely to relax and feel good. Also, I found out that listening to this kind of jazz makes playing Street Fighter at the same time nigh impossible. If you have any good suggestions for other jazz, tell me! I'm always eager to expand my collection.
Favorite song: So What
Rex Rating: Fabulous

A Random Finale
Or, thoughts to take with you.


This image was actually from Dtoid, it seems that 620x350 is the site standard.

I love Spongebob.

What irks me is rappers who use others' music to rap over. The other day, I thought I heard My Sharona, but it was just somebody rapping over the tune. I just want to listen to My Sharona, goddammit!

I promised another Rex, PI a while back, but I have been quite, quite, busy. This week especially, because of a play that I was in. The final week of production leaves one with little to no free time. If you haven't ever participated in a theater production, I highly recommend it. I've been doing it since I was a freshman in high school. It may consume time, but it's quite rewarding in the end, and quite fun, also.

I think I'll do several trivia installments this week.

Also, don't forget to fap! I've spent three hours on this post!   read


1:22 PM on 04.23.2011

RexwolfTrivia: No pictures today

Due to my current distance from a computer, you are just going to have to imagine the picture.

Currently, the point total stands at:

1 each for Tuna, Law, and HandsomeBeast!

2 for DynamoJoe!

And 3 for Occams! (who I may just have to give an extra point for introducing me to Hellsing. But if I did that, I'd have to give Law two for Baccano.)

Remember, the prize is the ability to give me a prompt for a special blog. If you don't want it, you can drop out any time. (which is recommended, only seven people may compete.) The first to five points wins!

-------------------------------------------

I've talked about Street Fighter before. It's pretty darn awesome. My two best characters are definitely M. Bison and Ryu. And now it's time for...

REXWOOOOOOOLLLLFFFF... TRIVIAAAAAAAAAAAA!

Interesting fact: Bison is called Vega in Japan. M. Bison was originally going to be the name of a different character, and the M actually stood for something. What did the M stand for, and what is the current name of that other character?

Aaaaaaaaaannnnnnnnddddd...

GO!   read


11:58 PM on 04.14.2011

RandomWolf2: Missed my birthday

[Yeah, sorry about not posting this. I’ve been busy. Very busy. Anyway, this is the fifth installment of RandomWolf and… I have no idea what fifth installments are supposed to mean. Let’s get on to the ramble.

Yet another addition of random rambling
Or, letting my mind wander on too long of a leash


Today I will talk about… Salamanders. Salamander, charmander. Charmander is pretty awesome, and so is Charizard, but I’ll always love Typhlosion the most. Speaking of Typhlosion, I can’t find my copy of Heart Gold, and that makes me a sad panda. I also lost my copy of Platinum, too, but that was before I even got far in it. I’m going to stop talking about Pokemon now. I am super stoked for Cave Story 3D! I am also stoked for OoT, too. I did like Majora’s Mask a bit better, though. It had awesome masks, like the Goron mask, which let you roll around really fast. I want a dinner roll. I love rolls of all kind and- OH YES! I just realized that I have some Hawaiian sweet rolls! Those things are amazing. If you haven’t tried any before, fix that. *Temporary mind jam* Also, I like Hawaiian pizza. Not everybody else does, though. Pineapple is delicious. All right, now I’m hungry. I’m going to… break out in song and dance! I have no idea where that thought came from. I am working in a production of Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat, though. Community theater=very fun. Now somebody’s talking about paper near me. I like Paper Mario. The second is probably my favorite. Bye, I’m going to go eat some rolls!

THE 3DS!
Or, it runs on unicorn shit and rainbow tears


I got my 3DS about a week ago, and it is such a fantastic piece of tech. The pack-in games, while entertaining, lost their luster quickly. I did find the Star Pics app or whatever it’s called to be very entertaining, though. My favorite picture is that of Kirby flying towards Samus on a Warpstar while she fires a laser at him. The 3D effect is fantastic, and while it’s not super-amazing, it is still quite nice. Nearly everybody I showed it to had commercial-worthy reactions (except the guy that said “Holy shit…” something tells me that Nintendo wouldn’t put that in a commercial). The viewing range wasn’t very bad, and I’ve even had people see it while watching over my shoulder.

The thing that I show to most people to showcase the effect is M. Bison’s Nightmare Booster. Quite a few of the Ultra Combos in Street Fighter look amazing in 3D, and they're really the only thing that I use 3D for. I am a fighting game novice, so the touch screen combos are amazing for me. While I can and do actually perform the combos by hand with characters like Ryu and Akuma, for the life of me I cannot pull off Bison's combos. The graphics of the game are fantastic, and so is the gameplay. Right now, I'm mostly playing with Bison and Ryu. With Bison, I use an alternate costume and color that are best described as "gay space ranger," and seeing him in said outfit getting his rear handed to him by the barrel minigame amuses me to no end. Also, I love how one of Zangief's alternate outfits is Robo-Zangief. That makes me very happy for some reason...

Ghost Trick
Or, the end of some awesome


So, I finished Ghost Trick a while back. It was an AMAZING game! In the levels near the end, the music changed ever so slightly to make the game feel more intense, and it worked! The characters became more and more compelling as the game went on, and mysteries became tangled, interweaving into a beautiful spider web that may be seen clearly once one nears the end. A certain gameplay change (no spoilers here!) that happened was absolutely fantastic, and quite fun to use. The ending is a bit surprising, and does not lack charm. Finally, MISSILE! Oh lord, he is such an adorable little puppy, and his presence is simply a gift from the gods. My one complaint: The final chapter was far too easy. If you haven't done so already, buy this game!

Super Metroid
Or, I guess atmosphere is one word for it...


Super Metroid is a marvelous game. I downloaded it on... Friday, I believe? ...and I've been playing the hell out of it. The amount of awesome that the game throws at you is impressive. A definite highlight is using the speed boost in conjunction with a ramp to literally fly across a room. One thing that many people talk about is atmosphere. The game definitely has that. One thing I love is how it constantly kept me on my toes at the beginning. Want to get a morph ball and missiles by revisiting a place from the original? Fine, but now our planet is suddenly alive and full of lightning-shooting robot mantises. Want some bombs? Well, this Chozo statue is going to fight you for them.

Now, we must get to another point: The game kinda scares me. I was fine until the battle with Crocomire (shown above). After losing a few times, I finally figured out the strategy, and was rewarded by the image of Crocomire's flesh melting away as it screamed in agony. Let me just say that I'm glad I never played it as a child. After that, other than a small scare from Crocomire's skeleton (did I say small? I meant large), I advance undaunted. Until the wrecked ship. Upon entry, it feels eerie, but not overly so. I move into the save station. Hm. It doesn't wor- HOLY SHIT WHAT IS THAT?!?! Yes. A floating ghost orb formed of rotting skulls. Luckily, I died, which was a perfect excuse to go play Super Mario RPG instead. I am a wuss.

The Stranger is Dead
Or, music! Yippee!


So, my first album of the post is "The Stranger," a fabulous record by the talented Billy Joel. Funnily enough, Law suggested I download a few BJ (damn! I told myself I would stop using those initials!) songs, The Stranger being one of them. Somehow, the entire album was on my computer without my knowledge. At first, I disliked some of the slower songs, but after many re-listenings, I realized that it was because I was simply in an overenergetic caffiene-fueled frenzy at the time. While short, this album is not lacking in any way, with a great volume of awesome packed into nine songs. Movin' Out (Anthony's Song) is a marvelous opening, and when it is followed by the eponymous track, they form a nigh unbeatable pair of amazing songs. Scenes From An Italian Restaurant and Only the Good Die Young are also two great tracks.
Rex rating: It's Billy Joel! Of course it's amazing!

Now, there is also a story behind this album, too. Apparently, somebody that my brother and I know is The Decemberists' manager. Since I had heard of them on occasion, I decided to download their newest album. Apparently containing much more country than their other music (which I have yet to hear/download), "The King is Dead" is quite the entertaining record. A few tracks that I consider the cream of the crop (or at least the ones I like the most) are "Rox in the Box," "Down by the Water," and "This is why We Fight." Also, death seems to be mentioned pret-ty often in the lyrics. Rex Rating: Great!

MiniMusings
Or, stuff not big enough for its own category

So, I recently had a third Dtoider invade my dreams. The first two were Law (We met, he was cool, the plot turned video game-y) and HandsomeBeast. (He was a slight dick and we fought it out Street-fighter style) This time, in only a small cameo via text message, it appeared that Talia was both in trouble with the law, and part of an underground fighting/boxing ring. My dreams are an odd place.

Watching Code Monkeys on Netflix, I can say that it's... alright. It is successful in making a TV show/retro game hybrid, but a lot of its humor doesn't appeal to me. Although, I caught some Retro City Ransom and Mega Man in some of the actions of the characters' sprites, which makes me happy.

I couldn't retrofit it into my paragraph about SFIV3D, but I tryed out C. Viper earlier today, and I like her. She's got an interesting style (With easy to pull off moves! Yay!).

Sunday was my birthday, and I was planning on having this post ready by then for a big birthday blowout, but things fell through. However, I did get enough cash to finance the purchases of my next few must-have 3DS games!

I made this in about twenty minutes when I was bored.

I'm hopefully going to get Rex, PI #4 up by next Friday. I'm also planning a super-secret blog that requires me to finish a certain game...

Blogging again feels good.

So, I'm not recapping the post this time because I'm tired and want some sleep!


This turned up when I tried to find a 620x300 picture of "sleep." No. Friggin. Way.

GOOD NIGHT!   read


8:37 PM on 04.09.2011

RexwolfTrivia: It's been a while...

Sorry about the absence of trivia lately; I've been busy. I've been busy. I'm going to keep this short, because there's a RandomWolf I'm working on that'll be up by today or tomorrow.

Law and (Not-so)HandsomeBeast each have one point!

DynamoJoe has two!

And Occams has THREE!



So, I downloaded Super Metroid yesterday. It is marvelous. Details can be found in the RandomWolf, but I can say this: I can see why it fights A Link to the Past as Chad's favorite game. And now it's time for...

REXWOOOOOOLLLFFFFTRIVIAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!

Anyway, the above suit is the Power Suit. There is another suit, though, that is better, orangeier (thatis a word!), and has larger (and more awesome) shoulder pads. Name it.

Also, tomorrow is a special day for me. Naming what it is will also net you a point if somebody else hasn't already scored and you can't name the suit..

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNDDDD...

GO!   read


5:47 AM on 03.22.2011

Technical Difficulties: Cute but Deadly



As I read through this month's series of musings about difficulty, I think about the games discussed and chuckle to myself. "Hell, I'd never be able to play through those games," I say.

While I may be a bit hard on myself, I do have a point: I'm not exactly what you would call a "skilled" gamer. Years of easy games and uneven genre exposure has made sure of that. When I play a game, I'm not generally looking for a challenge or frustration. Sure, I may enjoy getting my fix of adrenaline-pumping difficulty once in a while (Bit.trip RUNNER comes to mind, having dethroned the dreaded miner Non Trotski after over a month of efforts not long ago), but I usually enjoy easier games. I can't think of any series that is both so fun and so fabulous as the Kirby franchise is.

The Kirby series was created specifically so that anybody, casual or hardcore could beat the games. While a series engineered in that way may result in a shallow, boring experience in the hands of some, the exploits of our favorite ball of pink fluff have been anything but. Somehow, the fellas at HAL managed to create and maintain a series that is known for not only its low difficulty, but is also a boatload of fun.

So, how could this be so? The phrase "no pain, no gain" often comes to mind when talking about video games in terms of difficulty and fun. Many people think that for a game to be engaging and entertaining, it has to maintain a delicate balance of difficulty without being too easy or too hard. Kirby bucks this trend by starring in games that are simply entertaining, no matter how big or small the challenge is.



Not only does our courageous puffball have appeal to some gamers despite being easy, but I'd say that being easy is one of the reasons that Kirby is so fun. Let me expand on that: the fun comes not from being easy, but it comes from the feeling of pure power that many abilities give you. Nearly anybody who has played a video game can tell you how satisfying it is to land a huge hit. Kirby deals out huge hits left and right. Many of his abilities (hammer and UFO are prime choices) can kill foes in the blink of an eye, and nearly all of them are completely different and fun to use.

One of my favorite Kirby abilities of all time, Master from Kirby and the Amazing Mirror, is a perfect illustration of how power is so damn fun. This is the legendary sword wielded by Meta Knight we're talking about here, so you know it's going to be some amazing shit. It was designed to be the end-all be-all of weapons in the game. Need to pound in a stake? Master can do that. Need to light a fire or cut a rope? Master can do that, too. The description even says that it can solve any puzzle in the game. As if this wasn't enough, the moves you can do are amazing. A charged up wave of energy, a flurry of slashes, and a move where Kirby turns into a spinning torpedo of death are just a few things you can do with this veritable swiss army knife of death, and they are all extremely satisfying.



When Kirby isn't blowing through enemies with an overpowered fire sword, he makes sure to throw in a bit of creative fun, too. Kirby and the Amazing Mirror had a nonlinear, fully explorable world, something never attempted before or again by a game in his series (but similar to the Maze in Brawl's Subspace Emissary mode). With a group of friends only a phone call away and a large expanse of levels to explore at your leisure in any order you choose, the game set itself apart from other platformers (and cuddled up a bit closer to Castlevania and Metroid). Also, one of the boss fights in the game, the Mega Titan, found me coming back again and again. In it, you find yourself in a room with a giant floating robot, with four flying fists. Normal attacks don't hurt him, but by returning the stars created when his fists hit the ground, you can knock him into the electrified walls and kill him.

Another boss fight, this time from Kirby Super Star (Ultra) is one of my all-time favorite fights ever. Computer Virus, arguably one of the most meta boss fights a Nintendo game has ever featured, pits you against three enemies (slime, puppet, and wizard, or wizard, knight, and dragon depending on when you fight), but there's a catch. There are several old-fashioned computer "windows" up, showing the enemy's HP, the enemy himself, and the best part, a message bar that describes what's going on. It plays like an RPG, with Kirby and the characters taking turns to attack. The best part is the end. After the death of the third enemy, windows start to close, and the game awards you EXP (not that it really matters) and powers up stats such as "squishiness," "courage," and "eye sparkle." Was the fight hard? Not really. Was it fun and entertaining? You bet your ass.

All of the fights described above are quite easy, and the abilities overpowered. While that may sound like a dealbreaker for a game, it's what makes a Kirby game a Kirby game. Sure, there are parts where you may be challenged, such as any boss rush or the always exemplary duels with Meta Knight, but they make up the minority of the Kirby experience. The little fella has never been about challenging fights or balanced abilities, but these things are instead made in a way that's just fun to play. In my mind, Kirby is one of gaming's greatest badasses, and after reading this, I hope you know why.

  read





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