So I've been left lying in a pool of my own blood, bruised and beaten to a pulp by myself of all people and all done out of pure frustration. If it hadn't been me, it would have been the 360 that I would have thrown against the wall and there were a few moments of blind rage where I even felt myself reaching out to do exactly that. All of this came from my retro tinted spectacles (think rose tinted but in 16bit glory) being shattered by downloading and playing the original version of Banjo-Kazooie on XBLA.
Being such a Banjo fangirl I was obviously very opposed to Banjo-Kazooie: Nuts & Bolts since "Banjo mixed with Lego vehicles and racing" is obviously such a stupid idea that it could never work. I was lucky enough to pick up a free download code for the original game when N&B was released and I couldn't wait to get home to it since the original game was obviously far superior. As a child I remember spending rather alarming amounts of time on Banjo-Kazooie and collecting all those damn jiggies and I loved every minute of it, yet I find myself agonized as I replay it now.
While loading the game I found myself charmed by the bright colours, yet after 20 minutes I could feel my eyes melting. It's not that I am opposed to alarming bright primary colours but after I came out of rehab for Viva Pinata I fell into my 'shades of gray' phase with games such as Gears of War and the relapse scares me. I also remember being charmed as a young gamer by the cute little voices given to characters while they talk, but after about three sentences from Bottles I found myself loading up iTunes and craving Nine Inch Nails or anything slightly depraved.
The game play is where it not only broke my heart but ripped it out of my body, still beating and then showed it to me as I gasped for my last breath because the game is broken; I swear to God it's bloody broken and I do not remember it being so infuriatingly broken! I have never ever wanted to throw my controller out of the window so badly, I swear I hit that bad guy, and yes I've heard the phrase 'don't hate the game...blah blah blah', but I swear I hit him so why isn't he dead?! It isn't dead because the game is bloody broken and if that isn't enough the camera has absolutely no interest in helping me complete this game as it enjoys making me play through brick walls or at increasingly annoying angles.
This isn't just with Banjo-Kazooie--I've felt this with so many other retro games, games which have shaped my childhood like Zelda or Final Fantasy—I will always love those games yet they don't transcend into my next-gen world of gaming. I've been spoiled by beautiful graphics and smooth gameplay that out-do anything retro games can produce. These next gen games won't ever knock games like Banjo-Kazooie or Zelda off my list of all time favourite games, they will merely join them upon the pedestal I have created for them. Yet replaying games like Banjo Kazooie is the reason I wish I didn't bother. Retro tinted spectacles allow me to look back upon games that by today's standards would be classed as crap and remember them fondly, but maybe that's how they should stay; fond memories. My experience of Banjo-Kazooie makes me scared of what replying games like Final fantasy VIII will do to my love for it. I don't want to hate or curse it, I don't want to feel like I'm punishing myself either; these games shaped me into the geek I have become today. It takes a certain type of gamer to appreciate retro gaming in a modern world, I certainly haven't lost my love for all those old games, I still kiss my N64 goodnight, but consoles like the 360 have taken me firmly by the hand and pushed me head first into the next generation world and I am kinda of scared that there is no longer a chance to turn back.
And yes, Banjo-Tooie is also on its way to XBLA, so if you really want to ruin someone's childhood...
This the same post I put up on the front page of the website I blog for called GEN or http://www.girlsentertainmentnetwork.com/ I met these people through dtoid, I've been here nearly 2 years and those who have been here just as long, if not longer, will remember people like William Haley, VirtualGirl, Kananya and Aktrez who are all over at GEN. GEN is taking some big steps right now and is trying to stand upon its own two feet and traffic and support it totaly needed. show the love...http://www.girlsentertainmentnetwork.com/my-broken-16bit-heart/ I know if it wasn't for all my time here at dtoid I wouldn't be blogging over at GEN and actually really enjoying it.
SEE YOU AT PAX BITCHES!
(# 0) on 01/30/2009 21:14
(# 1) on 01/30/2009 21:16
(# 2) on 01/30/2009 21:18
(# 3) on 01/30/2009 21:20
if I read tentacles instead of spectacles is there something wrong with me?
(# 4) on 01/30/2009 21:26
(# 5) on 01/30/2009 21:44
(# 6) on 01/30/2009 22:04
(# 7) on 01/30/2009 22:08
(# 8) on 01/30/2009 22:08
(# 9) on 01/30/2009 22:55
It was recently, before the Sonic Unleashed release I was playing through all my Sonic games, for comparison.
I never hated Sonic Adventure(2) so much in my life.
(# 10) on 01/31/2009 00:22
Also, Perfect Dark hurts my eyes now, too.
(# 11) on 01/31/2009 00:40
(# 12) on 01/31/2009 01:41
(# 13) on 01/31/2009 01:49
This is the best thing I’ve read from you yet. Nicely done!
I’m a pretty big retro guy, but I definitely agree that there are a lot of games that seem archaic and out-classed nowadays. I mean, Super Mario World still looks and plays beautifully if you ask me, and so does Megaman X (16-bit FTW!). But games from the 64-bit era (N64 and PS1 specifically) I find especially hard to go back to because that’s when 3D games were still on their proverbial training wheels. It sucks when I try to recreate that magic I felt back in the day playing hours upon hours of games like Diddy Kong Racing or GoldenEye and instead end up kicking my childhood self in the face.
P.S. Header image is the best thing I’ve seen all week.
(# 14) on 01/31/2009 02:01
...oh well, time to get moving.
(# 15) on 01/31/2009 03:45
(# 16) on 01/31/2009 04:27
(# 17) on 01/31/2009 04:53
(# 18) on 01/31/2009 10:02
I may as well have had sex with the Xbox Live version of Banjo Kazooie, because it made me tingle down there so much
(# 19) on 01/31/2009 10:15
i cant even sit through shadow of the collusus any more, let alone an older zelda or final fantasy.
WHAT HAVE WE BECOME!!!!!!!!!!
(# 20) on 01/31/2009 11:04
I think we forget how far games have come on in such a short time, tighter controls and coding e.t.c
well, most of the time...
(# 21) on 01/31/2009 15:55
Somthing like doom though while I liked playing it years ago has obviously been bettered by loads of other FPS games from then.
Just depends I guess, some games and genres I belive have canged for the better while others for the worse.
(# 22) on 02/01/2009 08:09
(# 23) on 02/02/2009 06:47
Also go back and play FF-8 and tell me that the Balamb Vs Galbaldia Garden battle isn't one of the best moments in any FF or even any game ever and I will rape you in the ear.