I started writing my entry for this contest, and I...got a little carried away.
So I decided to post my entry in blog form. Here you go!



When I was little, I was always scared of things. I refused to go to haunted houses on Halloween; I refused to see any scary movies. As for scary games...well, I was always a gamer, but my parents were somewhat strict about me playing M-Rated games as a child.

Thus, the scariest thing I experienced in a game at that point was most likely the level in Crash Bandicoot where you get chased by a polar bear.



I had nightmares for weeks.


Anyway, at the end of 2003 (when I was 13), a very interesting-looking game came out for the Playstation 2: Fatal Frame II: Crimson Butterfly. I hadn't played the first one, but the camera-based fighting sounded so interesting to me that I figured I was finally ready to try a horror game. My parents apparently thought so too, as they bought it for me for Christmas that year, despite the Mature rating.

So the first horror game I ever played was also the first M-Rated game I ever owned. I had no idea what to expect, but I can say that I did not expect it to be as scary as everyone said.

I was wrong.

I turned off all of the lights, started up the PS2, and waited for the game to start. The big red Tecmo logo came up onto the screen, and I shivered. Then the intro video played, and I promptly shut off my PS2.

I was terrified, so much so that I could not bring myself to play the game I had been waiting for. The next day, however, I gave it another try.

And I was hooked.



The experience was unlike any game I had played before. The terrified feeling turned to excitement as I progressed further into the game, learning how to combat the ghosts instead of simply running away.
After that, I went on to play the first Fatal Frame and loved it just as much.
I wanted to experience every horror game that I could, looking to replicate that feeling of true fear that I felt the very first time I played Fatal Frame II.

I'm not sure if I'll ever feel quite that way again, but it goes without saying that the Fatal Frame series got me hooked on the horror genre.

Thanks to that, horror movies no longer have any effect on me. Experiencing fear in a game is something much greater than can ever be expressed in another form of media. You're not afraid that someone on screen is going to be killed; you're afraid that YOU are going to be killed.

It is an experience unlike any other, and it is the reason that Horror games are among my favorites.

When this meme started up, I didn't post anything because I thought it was just taking up space. I thought everyone was doing it just for the sake of doing it; just to participate in the meme.

But after reading most of the blogs, I feel the exact opposite. Everyone here genuinely loves this community, this site, and everyone involved with it. We aren't just a site on the internet where people post interesting things; we're a group of friends.

I've met numerous people on Destructoid whom I actually consider to be my friends; who I can go to for advice, or laugh with over Skype.

I can't write a "Why I Love Destructoid" blog quite the way everyone else has been because I can't quite put it into words, just how much I love this community.

I've only been here a little over two months; I don't have any funny pictures from meet-ups (though I hope to sometime soon), and yet my love for this site is already overwhelming.

I've never been on any other site that feels this way. I've been to a few forums before, and I've quickly left all of them out of boredom. There was nothing on any of those sites that I felt attached to, and I didn't feel emotion towards anyone on them.
Here, I could not possibly feel any stronger about the exact opposite.


So...Destructoid and, more importantly, everyone who I've met here: I love you.

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'Nuff said.
Happy Birthday.

EDIT: I took out .hack//INFECTION, and added in Mother 3. Because, somehow, I forgot about one of the few games to ever make me cry while originally making this list.


So, Scary Womanizing Pig Mask made this really great thread, over here.

I thought about it a lot, and I'm really satisfied with the list I came up with, so I'm posting it here.
This is honestly more for my own archiving purposes than anything, but feel free to comment if you want. :D

10. Metroid Fusion



If you don't get goosebumps watching that, there is something wrong with you.
My #10 spot was almost taken by The World Ends With You, but I decided to replay Fusion last night and realized just how incredible it was.

Hiding from SA-X (easily the most exhilarating moments in the game) is only the icing on the cake. Everything else about the game is so new, and done so well.
It was just enough of a departure from the series to feel new and exciting, but at the same time managed to keep the classic Metroid feel.

This is an example of what any sequel should be.


9. Castlevania: Aria of Sorrow



Hm, I guess I like Metroidvanias.

Aria of Sorrow is the only Castlevania game that I've beaten to 100%. Every item, every Soul, every corner of the map. And I enjoyed every moment of it.

Between the characters, music, and environments (not to mention all of the great new weapons that exist because the game takes place in modern day), this is easily the best game in the Castlevania series.



8. Ninja Gaiden (XBOX)



This is probably the only game that's on this list for gameplay alone.
I didn't care all that much for the story of Ninja Gaiden. But it didn't matter.

All of the gameplay, from exploring beautiful environments to the most fun combat I have ever experienced in a game, is absolutely incredible.

I mean, just watch the video.


7. Metal Gear Solid 2: Substance


Skip to 3:50 for the good parts

Yeah, yeah, everyone else thinks MGS2 is the worst game in the series, blah blah blah.

When I first played this game, I was absolutely blown away when the scene in the video up there started happening.
I had no idea how to process it. I had never seen anything like it in a video game before.

It still holds a BIG place in my mind as one of the most disturbing (but simultaneously awesome) things I've ever experienced in a game.

Oh, and VR Mission Mode is really fun.


6. Mother 3



I cannot believe this game completely slipped my mind when I first created this list. There is no way in hell I like .hack//INFECTION (cool as the story was to me) anywhere near as much as I love Mother 3.

It was the most touching, fun, and thought-provoking narrative I've ever seen on the GBA.

Also, Kumatora is sexy.



5. Final Fantasy VIII

SPOILERS


The scene with this song is enough to give this game a place on my Top 10 by itself.
People like to complain about the graphics in FFVIII, but when this game first came out, these graphics were incredible. It didn't seem possible that anyone could make a game so beautiful.

I first played it on the playable demo that was included with Brave Fencer Musashi (also a really great game), and I was blown away.
Needless to say, the full game did not disappoint me.

Also, say what you will, but Squall is easily one of my favorite characters from anything, ever.


4. Megaman Legends 2



I honestly can't think of anything wrong with Megaman Legends 2.
As much as I love the classic Megaman gameplay, Legends 2 is easily my favorite game in the entire series.

There is hardly another game out there with such fun characters. The voice acting was incredible for the PS1 era, the music was epic, and the gameplay was fun.

Can't ask for much more than that.


3. Klonoa: Door to Phantomile

SPOILERS!


I just looked that video up and watched it for the first time in years.

I'm crying a little bit now.
I think that speaks for itself.


2. The Longest Journey


(This image is fan art, but it is fucking beautiful. Here's the full size version.)

I first played The Longest Journey a very long time ago. I, of course, got stuck on a puzzle and never played it again.

Then, a sequel came out: Dreamfall. It looked great, so I decided to give it a try, even though I hadn't finished the first game (the main character was someone new, and the plot stood on its own).
It was decent. The gameplay was bad, but the story was VERY compelling, so I decided to try The Longest Journey.

I won't go further for sake of spoilers, but seeing the ending of The Longest Journey, after already having played Dreamfall, was probably the most emotional experience I've ever had with a game.



1. Kingdom Hearts II: Final Mix +



I don't think anyone saw this one coming.

Kingdom Hearts II, when it first came out in America, was a HUGE disappointment for me, to say the least.
Not because I didn't enjoy the story (oh god yes, I did), but because the game was too fucking easy. There wasn't a single thing in the game that was even remotely a challenge, and I remember thinking "I could probably beat this whole game at Level 1."

Then, Final Mix + came out, and it let me do just that.
Critical Mode, all of the new bosses, and the new areas are amazing additions on their own; but coupled with the ability to set your Level so low that the weakest enemies in the game kill you in one hit makes it my favorite game of all time.

What can I say, I'm a masochist at heart.

If you don't know what Runner is, it's a free game created some of the Destructoid staff.

Get it here:
http://www.destructoid.com/runner-a-game-made-by-dtoid-staff-members-is-now-playable-129297.phtml

(definitely play it yourself before you read this!)

Here's a video of my own playthrough of it for reference:



Now this isn't going to be some deep, Freudian analysis of Anthony Burch's head, nor is it going to be a professionally-written masterpiece. This is just my experience with a game that I love, and I would like to share it with you.


The game begins by telling you to avoid the three ghost-like girls chasing you. The city behind you and the road ahead of you could represent anything. They are gray, bleak, and ambiguous. What matters is the characters you are running from, and the walls you are trying to avoid (as they are the only things in color).

At the beginning, it is very easy to avoid the walls. You can see them coming ahead of time, and it is fairly easy to move out of their way. However, your vision is soon obstructed by pictures coming from a speech bubble made by one of the pursuing women.
These speech bubbles are the sole source of the game's story, yet you are trying throughout it to avoid them, maybe even look away from them, in order to see where you're going. They show the reasons why these relationships ended: One girl who was annoyed with the character's movie-making obsession, and another who fell in love with someone else.

For me, this was the most important part of the game's experience. You are running from your past, from the memories (both good and bad) of the ex-girlfriends who haunt you. As a player, you want to experience the game's backstory by looking at these picture bubbles.

This desire is overcast by the innate desire of any gamer to win the game. If you spent all of your time looking at and analyzing the picture bubbles, you are likely to crash into walls and lose the game. Likewise, if you only pay attention to the road and the walls, you will not notice everything that is present in the picture bubbles.
In this sense, you are really put in the shoes of this character, even if against your own will. In order to “win”, the character must choose to ignore his past and move on. If he dwells too long on these memories, he will eventually stumble and be “caught” by his past.
In the game, the girl simply grabs you, without changing her expression, and holds you still until you decide to retry or quit the game. The character would be forever stuck, in terms of emotions, fixated on this one memory of her. He is struggling to free himself, but he is powerless until the player decides to try again from the beginning.



The main character is afraid of his past. He did enjoy being with these women at one point, and he doesn't hate them. Rather, he is afraid of them. When running, his face (which, despite being small and pixelated, shows a very wide range of emotions) is one of sorrow and regret. When he hits a wall, his expression changes to one of fear.

Then, at the halfway point, he finds a typewriter. I imagined the character writing a story; a recollection of his most recent past love whom he did not yet want to forget. Frantically, he types page after page about when they were in love, but this power eventually diminishes and he falls back to the ground. No matter how many happy memories we posses, no love can stay the same forever.
After this, the next memory is of a girl whom he did not leave willingly. She grew up without him, made new friends, and her personality changed. This soon led to an argument, and they have presumably not spoken since. He regrets this, but recognizes that he has to move on.

However, he is completely held by his memories. That is, until he finds someone new. As soon as the player touches this new (not ghost-like) girl, the past women begin to back off, his painful memories quickly fading. His facial expression changes to one of bold determination, and together they use their love to break through all of the barriers attempting to stop him from moving on in life. But this love, too, quickly diminishes into nothing, and these barriers break the couple apart.
As their love grows weaker, he begins to remember the past girlfriends again, letting the “barriers” get the better of him. This causes a fight, and his new love soon leaves to join the ranks of his old.

His face again becomes sad, but this time there are very few barriers. Since she was his most recent love, it is much easier (though just as painful) for him to remember their time together. As such, there are less barriers in this section so that the player is able to watch the picture bubble of this memory with little effort.

I felt regret, wishing that there was some way that I could have changed this, and made that love last forever. I played the game multiple times, attempting to change this mistake. But, of course, this was all to no avail. This love was not meant to last forever and, just like after all of the previous relationships, it was time to move on. I jump over the final barrier and...nothing. Darkness. Silence.

At first I thought the game had crashed, but as soon as the credits began to appear, a rush of emotions swirled through me.
I had to play the game two more times before it completely sunk in. I have not been touched by a game in this way in quite some time.

I know this is long, and it's much more interesting to play the game for yourself than it is to read my interpretation of it. But I just had to get this down into words while I was thinking of it, and I figured I'd share it with you guys. Thanks for reading.

Feel free to leave a comment if your interpretation was different than mine at any point. I want to see what you guys felt during this game too. We all have different pasts, and I'm sure some of you thought about completely different things while playing this.

Okay, I made this as a post in the forums, but it was a good rant, so I figured I'd make it my first Blog here. Not that anyone will read it, but I thought it was worth saving. Anyway, here goes.


I'll try to keep this spoiler-free, plot wise, but I just HAD to complain about this game.
First I'll say that I LOVED FFIV. I played it on the SNES as a kid but never finished it, and was delighted when the DS version came out so that I could complete it. It was a great game (though the last dungeon was a bitch).


But The After Years. Oh god, The After Years.
The main game is fun. Playing as a new character and getting to interact with all of the old characters was awesome. It offered a new plot, and was fun to play for more than just nostalgia's sake.

And then, just as the plot was getting good, it ended. The main game is LESS THAN 5 HOURS LONG.


Now, this might have been acceptable, seeing as it is an $8 game, and it expects you to buy the DLC to have a full experience.
But that's the problem: The DLC is HORRIBLE.

I just completed my second DLC add-on, and I severely doubt I'm going to continue. Each one is less than 3 hours long. That's barely the intro in most RPGs.
Now, if they were actual continuations of the main game, this would be fine (in my eyes, I know some would disagree), but the problem is that each one starts you over again as a NEW CHARACTER.

Meaning that you have to level up from the beginning each time you start a new DLC. And by the time you level enough to even notice a difference in your stats, the game is over.

The whole reason RPGs are fun is that feeling of slowly getting stronger, easily kicking the asses of enemies that used to give you trouble, and building up to fight the final boss. All of these DLC add-ons just feel like playing the boring intro to a mediocre RPG over, and over, and over.

In short, unless you are a die-hard FF:IV fan who needs more content, do not waste your money on The After Years.