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I'm a spunky fun-loving schoolgirl who likes to paint and sing folk music and have play time with my teddy bears!

Wait this isn't myspace?

Ok, so I'm some fat guy sucking down cheetos and slim jims as if the universe were imploding in upon itself tomorrow.

I Play everything except JRPGs, Party Games, Movie Games, Game Movie Games, Games based off movies based off books based off JRPGs, and anything that might end up being made by Uwe Boll. I'm looking at you, Sim City.

I don't like unparented little kids, most game review sites, and slinkies. Damn things freak me out.

World of Warcraft
Madden 09
Sim City 4
Medieval II
Soul Calibur IV

Fallout 3
Empire Total War
Fable 2
A real Sim City game

Fanboys eat ass and die.

7:18 AM on 10.03.2008

With Age of Conan somewhat hitting the crapper, Conan on the 360 looks to be more of the same we've seen from other console MMOs, a rehash of a game that wasn't all that great to begin with.

Conan being a disappointment doesn't bring a lot of hope to the Console MMO crowd. If you want one now you pretty much have Phantasy Star Universe...a game that is decent at best and very average and uninspired at worst. There have been rumors and whispers of Warcraft, Dragonball, and any number of generic fantasy and comic book games in talks, but nothing's really come to fruition. There's still Huxley, but who the hell knows when that'll actually release.

The main thing about most MMOs is variety. With only 8-15 buttons, you can only do a certain number of things. Even using combinations of shoulder buttons and sticks (think Mass Effect), it still would limit commands to a fraction of what you'd find on a computer. You could possibly add voice commands but when the sh*t hits the fan you don't want to have to speak slowly and clearly and have it mess up and somebody or everybody die because it didn't read you clearly enough. You could always just ship a damn keyboard with the game but there won't be a lot of people that buy a game, possibly pay a subscription, have to pay for a keyboard, and a new headset every month from getting pissed at that 11 year-old calling you a douche and throwing the things across the room. There's also the issue of servers, making a game with minimal hard drive usage, and relying on a system that will only be around for 3-7 years.

For all the people like me that would like a deep, intricate MMO on the 360 or PS3 (or even the Wii, but I don't think slinging around nunchuks for hours a day every day would be very comfortable, though possibly good exercise), sorry, it's just not coming in this generation. From what it looks like we'll just have to wait for MAG, which I don't believe is really an MMO at all--it just has a lot of people playing at once.

Don't get me wrong, I'm holding out hope that something will come along and sweep my off my overly-girlish looking feet, but it'll be quite a while until I actually have expectations that have a chance to be met.