While many games have cute enemies to make you smile, these are the enemies that make you feel like a real bitch when you lose to them.

#5. Andre the Cat in Shadow Hearts 2: In a game that already makes it tough to take most things for granted, Andre is even MORE difficult to take seriously than everything else: it's literally a giant pink kitty with little bells on it. It doesn't help that the scene leading up to it is hilarious as well. However, while not the hardest boss in the game it still puts up a decent fight for the party. Heed these words, beware of the Pink Pussy.

#4. Undine Lizard from Secret of Mana – The first time you see this little cute lizard, you are like “hey, this should be an easy fight.” The blue guy just wanders around mostly, letting you hit him. Then he proceeds to fucking swallows one of your teammates! That’s right, just swallows them whole. Oh you can hit him to get him to spit up your ally, but it does a fuckton of damage and you don’t even have a goddamn cure spell yet! A cute enemy but don’t underestimate this wannabe Kirby motherfucker.

#3. Anita from Marvel Super Heroes – Another secret character on this list, because let’s face it, if Anita was a regular option, people would declare Marvel Super Heroes one of the cheapest fighting games ever! She is a small target, only a little bigger than Servebot, allowing her to automatically evade fireballs, most combos and even some super attacks. On the flipside, she has powerful moves, makes use of Donovan Baine’s enchanted sword from Darkstalkers, and her apparent enslavement of Akuma from Super Street Fighter II Turbo as well… Oh and let’s not forget her super move, Love for You! Or a more apt name: 10,000 Doll Heads of Raining Death!! This fucking move hits you 80 times, does tons of damage, can be combed! And in case you don’t think Anita is cheap enough, her Super does 50% chip damage even if blocked, even able to knock opponents to the ground.

#2. Ozma from FFIX – This super secret boss is a giant spinning sphere of rainbow bright goodness! Doesn’t look too threatening, huh? Well, he IS! It is ultra fast, often taking several turns for each of your characters’, has some really damaging attacks if your party isn’t prepared like Mini and Meteor, and is harder to kill then you may think, as he casts Curaga on himself, healing all his life back, often just to spite you! Add in the fact that you can’t even reach him with melee attacks unless you complete a sidequest, and we have one tough customer! We looked it up and Ozma is Japanese for “Satan’s right testicle”, so beware.

#1. Black Rabite from Seiken Densetsu 3 – Evil in its cutest form and the toughest fight in the game. This secret boss is a brilliant ironic creation and the best sign that Squaresoft may be lacking creativity these days. Oh who the fuck am I kidding, they are lacking creativity! Hello, umpteenth FFVII related game! The Black Rabite will massacre any unprepared team, it knows every powerful spell in the game and if you hit it wrong, it summons actual Level 99 Greater Demons for backup! No one fucks with the Black Rabite. It will kill you, rape your dead corpse, and if you really piss it off, the little evil incarnate will delete your game and fry your SNES. Ok maybe it wont do that but it might as well considering how powerful this evil in cute form is.



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