Seeing as how the forums are broken, I would post this here instead.
The bathroom at my work sucks. And stinks. And is located in the worst possible location. It is RIGHT NEXT to the office kitchen. Yeah, and the vent that sucks up all the dirty crap smells doesn't work very well. And the walls are paper thin, so anybody in the kitchen is privy to whatever duty is going on in the bathroom. It's like we all have sonar in the office kitchen.
I know Banj had a great thread about this subject in the forums, but since its unavailable, I'll drop this shit here.
Generally, I do not drop shits at work. I find it unappealling. I like to pretend that everyone else at my work also doesn't do what I like to not do at work. It's a part of their life that I have no interest in, and I like to go on my merry way, ignorant of the types of sounds and smells that exit their poophole.
Exceptions being (for myself)- I show up to work twenty minutes early and am the only person there, and the two cigarettes I smoked on the way to work as well as the coffee I drank has loosened up my intestines to the point of leakage.
The only other exception- Eating seven Stuffed Jalapenos from Jack in the Box (a fast food restaurant) last night after downing a six pack of cheap beers. This my friends is a ticking time bomb. And so I woke up this morning, feeling a bit sick. Luckily, I was actually a bit early in getting ready and was able to get a couple minutes to read magazines and empty my bowels at home (or so I thought).
I drive to work. Smoke two cigarettes. My stomach begins to cramp. I begin to sweat. I have two coworkers (both women if it matters) and think whether I should go or not. My ass feels like its on fire (thanks Jack in the Box!) and decide I have no choice in the matter.
I go to the bathroom, drop my pants, and feel as vulnerable as a dog taking a shit in public (you've seen their expressions, its sad).
After carefully making sure all was clean in the bathroom, I exit to the presence of my coworkers in the bathroom, no doubt having been treated to a symphony of sounds that only my ass could provide.
So, anyone else have a shitty location for their work bathrooms? Mine's next to the work kitchen, which I believe is the worst design choice, ever.
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I actually laughed out loud while reading that at work, because I feel your pain. My bathroom is right next to our kitchen as well, and is also surrounded by a few classrooms. It's impossible to get down to business during the day, when students in the adjacent Japanese class can hear every noise coming out of you.
If that wasn't bad enough, we have international students from all over the globe here, who have different customs when it comes to knocking on bathroom doors. Many love to just burst right in, which has driven me to paranoia as I check that the door is locked every time. And then there are the people who just hang outside the door after finding it's occupied. That's lovely.
I have to share 3 stalls, 2 urinals, 3 showers, and 4 sinks with a bunch of stanky fucksticks on the ship.
When we're out to see, that's all we got, and sometimes it backs up and you get shit all over the floor.
Its bad.
http://www.destructoid.com/elephant/#brb%20-%20something%20broke.%20Also,%20hi%20Yojimbo!
At least in my eyes.
oh wait...
but seriously I hate having to share a toilet but it is nice to know you're being paid to shit :)
also, Stuffed Jalapenos... WTF?? I've never seen these in Australia but they sound good, what's the deal with them?
They are hollowed out jalapenos that have been stuffed with cheese, breaded, and then fried. Use buttermilk sauce as a side dip.
Very good. Spicy and refreshing balanced perfectly.
usually i'll pull out my ds and make some progress while im at it
It's the shit we americans come up with when we decide what we should deep fry next. Honestly they are fucking tasty, problem is they tend to give you the runs.