After many hours, many attempts, and many tears, I am finally putting down my Xbox controller and giving up on Ninja Gaiden. I have been repeatedly stumped in trying to beat a boss that has caused me high blood pressure, a possible ulcer, gray hairs, and a lower threshold for insane outbursts in public.

I give to you my archenemy- Satan.



You have destroyed my videogame ego. I used to think that I was pretty badass when it came to games. I have a natural attraction towards shoot'em ups, and they are usual quite difficult. I tend to think I overachieve in that genre, and I always welcome a challenge. So when I found Ninja Gaiden on sale years ago, I decided what the heck, I'll kill this game and make it fetch my shoes.

Fast forward to the present. I have been/am stuck in the exact same spot that I have been on for months. Months!!! All because of Satan.

This game used to give me pleasure. I enjoyed the challenge, and knew that when I emerged victorious from a stage, it was because of my superior skill and knowledge of secret ninja techniques. But damnit Satan, you decided to be the boss I have to face with only one health potion, so that any sort of stumble will render my defeating you an impossibility.

I guess I'm not as good as videogames as I thought. Its disheartening to realize that Satan is stopping me from beating this game. What's worse is that I absolutely detest this game now. I stare at the Ninja Gaiden box on the floor now and it fills me with hatred and causes my thumbs to instinctively react. God I hate this game.

Oh well. Satan, I salute you. You have defeated me. You have made it impossible for me to cross that finish line and breathe in a lungful of championship air.

I am resigned to the fact that I will never beat Ninja Gaiden. It's sad, but I'm alright with it, because guess what game came in the mail the other day (I am really excited about it, and can't wait to kick its ass)-



Ninja Gaiden II!!!