What do you do when a genius tanuki steals the key to your gold stash, and puts into motion plans to turn the entire world's population into tanuki?



Simple. You put on a bunny suit, hop on a dragon, and kill anything that moves.



The Sega CD, like many Sega systems, was a decent home for shooters in its day, but none released at the time were quite as... peculiar as Keio Flying Squadron. Set in feudal Japan, the whole idea was that your family, guardians of this ancient key, lose said key to a tanuki with a 1400 IQ. Enraged, and threatened by your mother that no dinner will come for you until the key is retrieved, you throw on a "battle suit" (the bunny outfit) and hop on your dragon, Spot (aka Pochi, in Japan and Europe).

Challenge level was reasonable, but it was the cast of characters that gave it charm. Besides the core I already mentioned, there was a wide assortment of cute legions in Dr. Pon Eho's (mister 1400 IQ's) employ that spanned the range of Japanese mythological creatures, including this recurring fish-dude who piloted several boss thingies.

I say "thingies" because I have no idea what to call this:



Gameplay was pretty straightforward, scrolling shooter fare, with the option of acquiring up to two additional mini-dragons to assist you (a la Tiger-Heli, but sideways), but it was the game's charm that kept players coming back. That, and vaguely unwholesome thoughts about Rami, the main character, who could not possibly have been an adult given her birthdate according to the story, despite the American manual saying she was.



Unfortunately, charm was not enough to gain much ground for the franchise here in the States, so all we got in North America was the first game in the series. Later on, a sequel dropped on the Saturn that made its way to Europe, but murdering things with Pochi was only an occasional gameplay element, now that things had taken on more of a platforming (and still murdering) bent.

I'd love to suggest trying to pick a copy of Keio up if you can find it, but considering I just saw a copy of the Japanese original on eBay asking for $300, no. Don't. I may have fond memories of the brief time I had playing this on a friend's Sega CD, but no one game is worth the price of your (or someone else's) first-born child and fifty cents.



Good night, sweet princess, and may legions of forest creatures with magical genitalia send ye to thy rest.