...and by gay I mean happy.

I've got to talk about this crap and get it off my chest.

We all know the situation, they made a viral video, last five seconds it says that it was brought to you by Fight Against Grenade Spam blah blah blah I don't need to give the details, you already have them.

I don't agree with it and it did piss me off, but I'm not going to rave about that. I'm going to talk about all the reactions I saw, which bugged me even more than the original mistake!

I haven't talked to anyone in the flesh about this, so I have to base what I know on the forum responses. The annoying ones come in a couple of flavors. Ive seen people say things like "Who cares, what's the big deal?" Or "I'm not gay, but if I were, I wouldn't care!" Or the ever popular "Ï have friends who are gay and THEY don't care so why should I?" And of course there are those who don't even attempt to mask their homophobia and just make some kind of rude remark to be "SHOCKING".

Ignoring the outright homophobic, I think those are all poor excuses.

Who cares, what's the big deal?

The big deal is that the word had and still has a hateful connotation and is used by hateful people in an attempt to subjugate a lifestyle they disagree with. These are the same people who tell gay folks they can't get married or adopt. The same people who hide in alleys near gay clubs and jump them as they pass by. You think those days are over? I have a few friends who would disagree. I know not everyone lives in places like this, where gay people are still abused or forced to hide who they are in fear of harassment or physical harm, but some people do.

I'm not gay, but if I were, I wouldn't care!

That may be true, although I doubt you could really know that without being in the situation, but I'll give you the benefit of doubt and say that if you were gay you wouldn't care. That's fine. But you aren't everybody and in this day and age it seems the route we go is that even if we aren't personally offended by something, if there are those out in the world who are, it is in bad taste to bring it up. Not only in bad taste, but hurtful! And this goes double for something like a derogatory word! It isn't even necessary or clever. It's just the easy door to a laugh at best. But honestly, no one I know would laugh in the first place.

Ï have friends who are gay and THEY don't care so why should I?

There are a couple of holes in this kind of logic.

The first is that perhaps your friends really are insulted, but they don't say anything because that's the first sign of weakness. One of the reactions to living around a sizable group of people who believe that you are the spawn (and or future resident of) hell is that you develop a thick skin to deal with it. Speaking as a pagan, I remember for years I pretended that it didn't bother me when the Christians came to pagan pride day to protest us and call us devil worshipers. I laughed it off. But it did hurt me. Now when they show up, I tell them how I feel right back - I don't toss insults, I explain my feelings.

The other possible situation is that they really don't care. For that, see the above section titled "I'm not gay, but if I were, I wouldn't care!"

So lets wrap it up

The point is that any use of the word, even in jest, can give the word power because those idiots who really believe that being gay is wrong may be standing by listening to you and they might think you are serious. That adds another soldier, in their mind, to their crusade of hate. There's no need for that. Using the word as a joke doesn't take power away from it. Not using it takes the power away. The less people use it, the more the people who do use it stand out and feel dumb for speaking that way.

At any rate, that's how I feel about it. I don't expect change over night, but I just felt the need to voice my own opinion, thanks for listening.