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50Cent: Blood on the Sand - Why you SHOULD play this game..
munkee | 4:22 AM on 04.24.2011 9 comments


'50 Cent: versus the Middle East' uses more "mother fuckers" and more "niggaz" than any other game I can think of. It even has a 'taunt' button, which allows you to fire off a "Fuck off!", or a "Fucking die, nigga!" at will. This alone makes 50 Cent worth playing.



While performing a rap gig in the middle east somebody misplaces 10 million dollars of Fiddys money. To apologize for this the gig organizers offer Fiddy a jewell encrusted skull as compensation. This skull belongs to somebody else, who then steals it back. So, Fiddy goes on a murderous rampage across the middle east to get back the skull [that doesn't belong to him anyway].

Many middle easterners, dressed like terrorists will die over the next 5-ish hours of gameplay.

The gameplay is pretty shit. The graphics are pretty shit. The story is fucking stupid. The music is non-stop 50 Cent pumping through the speakers and the language used is over the mother fucking top at all times.. But, somehow the game is VERY fun.

See, the game has a combo meter and score system. Theres something intriguingly satisfying about running from terrorist to terrorist shooting, swearing, punching, shooting, swearing, killing, stabbing, blowing up, swearing, shooting again and stabbing some more without stopping for time to rap. The "bing bing bing" noise tallying up your blood money score is like a little voice inside your head relentlessly encouraging you to go faster and kill, stab, punch and swear just one more time. The action is broken up by awfully scripted and nonsensical cutscenes, which are just as childishly funny as the rest of the game.

We laughed a lot while playing this game. Its stupid, ignorant, childish, needlessly violent and standard at best. It has the 'so bad its good' characteristic and for this reason alone [and the swear button] I would suggest playing it.

But, dont buy it! Steal it and call the shop keeper a mother fucker while you punch and stab him in the face.



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8 comments | showing # 1 to 8
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Bakewell's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/24/2011 04:47
Bakewell
Agreed. I played through this at a friends and was amazed at how low quality it is. Playing video games will always require suspension of disbelief but 50 Cent blood in the sand stretched that beyond breaking point and yet I didn't mind. And the one liners in the cut sequences.....good god.

"I do all my banking online!"

It's so over the top, stupid and offensive you just tide along with it and pray none of fiddy's behaviour rubs off on you.
ManWithNoName's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/24/2011 05:16
ManWithNoName
What I find most intriguing is that nobody called this game 'racist' because it have the avail of a afro-american in it. That aside, I loove games who are just damn fun, even if not the best game around. Yesterday i finnaly finished The Saboteur and I recommend the game to anyone wanting to have some incredible fun time.
munkee's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/24/2011 06:01
munkee
Not only is the game racist with its language. But, the whole one-man american army vs. the stereotypical middle eastern terrorism is pretty awful too.
Mr Andy Dixon's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/24/2011 10:35
Mr Andy Dixon
I rented this hoping for an awesome weekend of couch co-op with my friend, only to get the game home and discover there WAS no couch co-op. To say we were disappointed would be an understatement.

We tried the "pass the controller" method for an hour or so, but eventually just took the game out and threw in Gears. It could have been fun, but a game like this has zeronexcuse not to have split-screen.
Mr Andy Dixon's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/24/2011 10:35
Mr Andy Dixon
*zero excuse
Elsa's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/24/2011 11:26
Elsa
LOL! Good blog... but I don't think you could pay me to play this game! (especially if there was no way to turn off the rap music... I really, really hate rap music).
meteorscrap's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/24/2011 12:25
meteorscrap
To be honest... I picked this game up for five bucks, and at that price?

Maybe I was bored, but I actually played the whole game. I'm not saying it's great, but let's be fair, here... For a Gears of War clone, it's better than, say, Quantum Theory. If the game weren't all about 50 Cent, it'd have probably been better reviewed than it was.

As it stands, it's a passable clone with some rather offensive background, but if you can ignore that it's a pretty solid shooter, overall.
Occams electric toothbrush's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/24/2011 13:20
Occams electric toothbrush
Any game that includes a taunt button where you can call someone a cocksucker makes me happy. I rented this with zero expectations and had a blast.
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