There's a specific design flaw of the PSPgo I feel I have to point out to Sony. It is a particularly worrying design flaw due to the fact that it can kill your PSP Go. I am not saying this out of jest. Do not take it as a personal attack either, I am still (even now) a firm believer that Sony always intends to deliver the highest quality of electronics and accessories to its customers all around the world. It is just that the power switch on my PSP Go was the death nail on its tiny rounded-side coffin. Let us examine the features of the power switch and how its variety of functions might have turned my $250 portable game system into a 5 ½ oz brick.

So the power switch toggles up and down. Found on the lower-right-hand side of the console, it's flat featuring bumps to add gripping action. Once the operator presses their thumb to it, they must now navigate a treacherous road from this point on. Flick the switch up and it turns the system on/off. Flick the switch the other way and it locks downward to function as a hold button. The fact that the amount of force necessary to unrest the power switch from the "hold" position is so much so that if you're not careful you can easily find yourself with a powered-off PSP Go, should foretell a life of pain in the eyes of a product tester.

The feeling of mistakenly hitting off is not unlike “accidentally” slapping a loved one, then coaxing them afterward while saying that you never meant for this to happen. Even when I finally learned how to unlock my PSP Go without inevitably turning it off, accidents would persist. Fortunately for me, the PSP Go bookmarks the spot where you were last for any given media (except that I am not certain the same applies to games, but we'll get to that later), so I could get back to where I was last within seconds. However, and this is where our tale turns into a travesty, please do take a few seconds few turning your PSP Go back on.

As I exited my house, one of my not favorite songs started playing on my PSP Go. It was so not one of my favorite songs that I needed to unlock my PSP Go... oh shit. Ok, well I need to turn on my PSP Go right now, as soon as friggin' possible, because technology must bend to my quick-tempered will as fast as it can. Well, I slid the switch back up the moment after I had turned it off.

Then again after that.

Once more... Uh.

(Actually gives the PSP Go a second to turn off.)

Tries one more time.

God damn it.

I have yet to buy a game for the system and it is already broken. I have yet to spend a cent on it, outside of the screen cover, and a major flaw has already presented itself. I bought it a week into October and it's a 14 gig paperweight in the first week of November. Wow. My disappointment is complete. I have never experienced this amount of pain with a portable console before. Every Nintendo portable console I have ever played has been a tank. Surviving a dip in the ocean (GB pocket), my sweaty, cheese-dust covered hands smearing the crevices around the buttons (GB), and devastating blows to its bumper buttons (GBA sp), has taught me that a portable console relies on durability.

While this might not be the most representative test of the PSP Go, I do believe that I can tell when a system has failed me and not the other way around. What I suspect to have taken place is that either I jammed the “on” side of the switch or it is somehow stuck in a permanent state of hold. A practical phantom zone of malfunctioning equipment, my PSP Go has reached the top of my shit list and will never come down. This could be a combination of software and hardware failure, but I cannot be sure. I only hope that I am one of a thousand that experiences this terror, but I believe I am not the only impatient and clumsy gamer around. I guess it's just one more reason to dislike the PSP Go.

Somehow I am still optimistic about the whole ordeal. Outside of the fact that it is now not actually functional, my PSPgo was a fun romp into the world of the mp3/mp4/downloadable video game playing portable system. I did get a chance to play the demo of Patapon 2 (fun as a demo) and the free guitar hero game (it's confusing to have to transition between instruments) that accompanied the system. The button scheme took a little time to get used to and the analog stick is still as sticky as I remember it to be, but the package is styled in a superior fashion compared to the original in my opinion. It looks so sleek. Watching tv on something that can compact itself down to only a screen is really a sweet feature. In the end, though, it's basically an iPhone you can play Final Fantasy 7 on.

I know this ends kind of like a review, but it's really more of a love letter to what could have been a more fulfilling relationship had I only been given more time. How sad.