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masterofchaz's blog

5:26 AM on 02.22.2012


First D-toid community blog... No biggie... Week after week, I've been letting these Bloggers wanted sections pass me by. Well, NO LONGER!

And so, as the saying goes, all good things must come to an end.

When it comes to memorable video games endings, the first game that springs to mind is Exhumed (or Power Slave as it was known in the US) for the PSone. Exhumed was an old FPS from Lobotomy Software Inc and based on the build engine, the same engine used for Duke Nukem 3D. As titles like Quake and Unreal led the polygon revolution, Exhumed was effectively lost to the current of time.

Set in Egypt, Exhumed is the classic FPS storyline of one man against hordes of evil sprite based monsters. In this case you are fighting an ancient technologically advanced race of aliens called the Kilamaat, who return to Egypt to conquer and dismember the human race occasionally mummifying people alive. The pitch is all very grim, but really the game is an excuse to blast dog headed anubi into meaty chunks with an M60, or burning teleporting cat people with gaming's greatest flamethrower, whilst making overtly manly noises when jumping.

In a neat twist of the formula, Exhumed contained Metroid style elements as you would gain artefacts granting you special abilities. For example, the Mask of Sobek allowed you to breathe under water for a longer amount of time, and the magic sandals of Ikumptet allowed you to jump higher. Eventually you gain the Horus feathers which allows you to levitate, which is insanely cool. Acquiring these items meant that you could go back through levels finding alternative paths, which would lead to all new levels.

The game also had an awesome music. Here is the music from the first boss level, an enemy I defeated before I realised the power of strafing. No mean feat let me tell you...

Exhumed had two endings. To be more precise it actually had one false ending and the true ending. I was about ten years old when I completed the game for the first time. You have to defeat the end boss in over to reclaim the mummified body of King Ramses and restore order to the world and stuff. The final boss is the stuff of nightmares - a monolithic insectoid scorpion monster that sent out swarms of what looked like giant testicles with rows of sharp teeth at you before turning into a bouncing snake dragon made out of fireballs.

Once you returned the body of King Ramses to Karnak you are led to believe that your job is done. World saved. Or at least it would be, if it wasn't for the fact that the tomb starts collapsing around you. The game then ends with you being buried alive with Ramses. Then, centuries later the Kiamaat return and successfully destroy mankind and dig up your body (exhumed!) and put your remains on display as a reminder of the conquered human race. It was a horrific ending.

The game then informs you that because you didn't reclaim all the hidden transmitter pieces spread throughout all the levels, you weren't able to contact rescue. So begins the process of finding all the transmitter pieces, that are given away by an audible bleeping sound.

Once more, you will then have to fight the final boss and his mob of toothed testicles. Then you get the good ending. This time, things look better. As the tomb begins to collapse around you, are given an escape route. Dodging fire balls and collapsing walls, you finally make it to the helicopter.

The rest just has to be seen to be believed.

To summarise:
"Because of your heroic efforts,
The valley of Karnak is no longer in danger.

At last, the people of Egypt can begin rebuilding the kingdom,
The world rejoices and a huge ceremony is held in your honour.

A renewed sense of peace and happiness is adopted by everybody on earth.
Several centuries later, your immortal power is proven superior to all other living creatures

and you become...


Its the kind of sweet ultimatum that you just can't beat. World peace and ruler of the planet. You don't really have to play any other games after that.

Sure Mario may finally get cake from Princess Peach. Sure Portal 2 had a great ending, the reveal of the moon, the moment of synapse when you realise that the lunar surface may actually be portable - so to speak. Sure Metal Gear Solid 3 had the added emotional punch of killing your surrogate mother and then getting betrayed by the woman of your affections and sure nearly every Halo game ends with a climatic warthog race to your evacuation craft.

You still can't beat and never will beat being king of the world.   read

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