I'm on the fence about censoring "testicles". I mean, it's simple human anatomy, right? I
know Destructoid is a magnet for the elderly and easily offended, though, so I'll keep it
clean to stay clear of the banhammer.
So let's get to it. This is my first post, although I've been lurking here for-fricking-ever.
"But why is this your first post," you ask with disdain, "especially with such compelling
diction?" Because blogs suck. Professionally-authored blogs are great and all, but
personal? Not so much. Most of the personal blogs I have experienced are unrelenting
chronicles of some smug asshole's day-to-day observations, with titles enveloped in a
symmetrical sea of brackets and asterisks. Seriously, man. I don't care about any of the
music you listen to, I just want to push you down a flight of stairs.
With that in mind, I've decided to start this blog. I'll probably update it once a year, since
that's about how long it takes me to think of something remotely interesting to write about.
And the most interesting thing I've played with in a while (other than my penis) is the PS3.
I've never owned a PlayStation. Many of my friends were "Sony bitches", but I always
preferred Nintendo. The PS1 depressed me. I was ten years old when it came out, and
while the black CDs were cool, the ultra-pixelated graphics were not. I remember trying to
play Ridge Racer once, and I literally could not distinguish between the road and a body of
water. Fail. Then there was the PS2. A pretty huge step, for sure, but it never really
piqued my interest.
So what changed?
Well, I've always been happy with my Nintendo shit; I'm well into one hundred titles
between the Wii and Gamecube alone. But it just so happens that a few weeks ago I
stumbled upon some monies I had completely forgotten about. So, like any smart investor,
I immediately decided to make a large purchase. And I wanted one of the "real" consoles:
either a 360 or a PS3.
It was a pretty easy decision: the PS3 has Blu-ray. Since Blu-ray won, this made a lot of
sense to me. Also, the PS3 doesn't chronically fail. Also, the PS3 has Gran Turismo. So I
set off to my friendly neighbourhood Wal-Mart and bought that shit, hard.
After a quick set-up at home, I made a few observations:
• It's a fat bitch compared to the Wii.
• It looks awesome, and it's surprisingly quiet.
• Suddenly the PS controller I used to hate is not that bad.
• Using your computer as a media server is the greatest idea ever.
• Holy crap: maybe I actually like Sony, the way everyone used to in the Eighties.
I was seriously hooked on the whole media server thing. Coming from a Nintendo-user
without a Media Center PC, it was like travelling 1000 years into the future, where
everything is awesome and David Copperfield is the emperor of Earth. I was downloading
shit just so I could stream it to the PS3 (like Spawn...
the movie). In a word, I was
impressed.
So then I decided to actually use this thing for some games. I figured a good first set
would be GTA4, COD4, Oblivion, and Uncharted. Not only are these graphically astonishing,
but these amount to some of the best, most original gaming I've experienced in years.
Oblivion alone would probably take most of my adult life to complete. I realize Uncharted
is the only PS3 exclusive here, but this next-gen crap is new to me, and it's pretty damned
cool.
What's next? I've already expanded my library quite a bit, and it looks like the upcoming
PS3 lineup is going to do some irreparable damage to my bank account. Metal Gear 4,
GOW3, SOCOM, Killzone 2, GT5, Soul Calibur 4, and Bioshock will ruin my life. PS3
firmware 2.40 will almost completely align the features of the PS3 and the 360, but online
play will still be free.
If you've tried the PS3 in the past, when it was super-expensive and apparently pretty
weak, I highly recommend giving it a second chance. What I've mentioned should be
reason enough, but if not, it has full-HD capability, a user-swappable hard drive, built-in
wireless, Bluetooth device support, and, if you have the right model, it can even play old
PS2 crap, like Madden 02 or something. It's pretty retarded. The creepiest part? Now
I'm the Sony guy.