Kane, after dying on Quick Man's stage for the 90th time.
The term "Citizen Kane of gaming" needs to be buried, along with "totes," "staycation," and "sparkling vampires".
Not because it's an exaggerated phrase, like the Godwin equivalent of any Internet argument invoking Hitler or the Holocaust. That, I don't mind. The problem is that it's trite. What's a famous movie that critics like? Citizen Kane. What do I like doing in my spare time? Gaming. How can I combine the two to create a delicious sandwich of my favorite pastime and art/intellectualism? Say X is the video game's Citizen Kane.
Beyond sounding like a hipster's failed attempt at MadLibs, the main issue is that it shows a somewhat obvious misunderstanding of a movie like Citizen Kane and, perhaps, movies in general. It was on the top of AFI's greatest movie list, but is by no means the most important movie to define cinema. Birth of a Nation defined the epic. Metropolis might be the first sci-fi/dystopian vision. Safety Last could be the first high-concept comedy.
Seeking the "Citizen Kane" of games is a silly endeavor because you should be seeking not one but several video games that redefined the genre in some manner. There are plenty games that do this, even if the use the same basic mechanics or style.
Below is an example. First is the final scene of Citizen Kane, which uses deep focus as a "larger than life" visual motif.
Now, below is a video from Jean Renoir's Rules of the Game, a French film that-- dare I say it-- also used deep focus! In fact, this movie is pretty damn famous (outside the US) and, I believe, uses deep focus much more effectively, especially in relation to the overly-complex plot involving emotional portrayals and backstabbing and cheating and so-on (by the way-- it's not as melodramatic as it sounds; it's actually pretty funny.)
I know that this makes me appear like some sort of hipster-film snob, but I'm not. Hell, I enjoyed Transformers!... when the robots were fighting. But I think the pursuit of a game that, as Destructoid's Burch quotes, "[utilizes] a medium's strength" is really nothing that you need to "find" so much as you have to explain in relation to the genre of video games as a whole. Citizen Kane's reputation is not unlike many other films that have been released; On the Waterfront is a good example, and so is Chinatown. Nothing particular is unique about deep focus and good editing; hell, this is what films should have. And, as being a complex character study? I can't count the number of good films focusing on one slightly-disturbed character.
As far as I'm concerned, Doom is a good contender is for such a title, in that it took the FPS and utilized it in a format that, at the time, was novel and seemed perfect for it. I personally wouldn't argue it, but it's a viable possibility. So is Goldeneye, Mario 64, Final Fantasy, and so on.
It's telling that the "Citizen Kane of gaming" is being used; no one says "the Macbeth of gaming" or "the Mona Lisa of gaming" or "the Death of a Salesman of gaming," all of which are genre defining and game-changing in their own ways. Let's be honest here-- it's not about genre-defining, since we have plenty of games that do that-- but it's about games as art, as the game we're "going to show to Ebert to convince him videogames are a legitimate art form". There's a pretty huge difference in games that utilize the medium to its most potent effect, and showing the world games can be art. The latter requires several games to do this, from the indie to the blockbuster to the foreign. It requires an avenue through which games can be studied and explored, returned to and debated, thought upon and analyzed. And while I truly admire sites like Destructoid trying to approach this issue, along with the active fanbase, I think that overall approach is flawed. I don't want "a" game to showcase gaming as an artform. I want "lots" of games. I want the people, the fans, the game designers, and so on to explain their thinking and their flaws, the ins and outs, the interplay of gamer/game, the controversy (real controversy, not Sambo-watermelon crap), and nuances of gaming as a whole.
A critic would already "roll his eyes" at the debate of a single game that's definitive of this.
The argument of Portal, Braid, Shadow of the Colossus, and Half-Life are starts. Hell, add in Pong, Pac-Man, Space Invaders, Mario 64, Sonic 3/Sonic and Knuckles, Mortal Kombat and Metal Gear Solid. Even the defunct Dreamcast. Show how they started an idea, began a movement, instigated a social and cultural response, supported or subjugated a genre, and so on.
Stop looking for the Rosebud, people, and start looking at everything around it.
Thanks to everyone who kept up with this! I'll be taking a short break (as in, working on my own original stuff) before I come back here with some more original blog type post things. Let me know what you think overall! At some point, I'll re-write this in proper format. :)
Thanks Destructoid for the opportunity!
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Ratchet, Sasha, Angela, and Clank stand on the roof within a new bustling city underneath a bright blue sky filled with flying cars and other aircraft.
They all watch a video on a floating vid-communicator screen with Abercrombie Fizzwidget signing a number of forms, while he waves and smiles for the camera.
DARLA GRATCH (V.O.)
…the exciting news that Fizzwidget will be taking full responsibility for all further developments at both Megacorp and Gadgetron. Courtney Gears and the leader of Thugs-4-Less are in custody, while Nefarious and Drek are nowhere to be found. In other news—
Ratchet turns it off.
RATCHET
I guess it never ends.
ANGELA
Some things do.
He turns to look at the two ladies in front of him.
RATCHET
You're really going back, huh?
SASHA
I'm afraid so. Metropolis still needs a mayor.
ANGELA
And I just want to go home and get away from it all.
RATCHET
I hear you. It's why I escaped out here.
CLANK
Thank you for all your help, Sasha, Angela.
SASHA
I should be thanking you, Secret Agent Clank.
The two girls turn towards each other. There's a moment between them before they shake each other's hands.
SASHA
You do good work. If you're ever in Metropolis, drop me a line. Maybe I can get you a job.
ANGELA
Politics? No thanks. Maybe security.
SASHA
I can handle myself, thank you very much.
ANGELA
Whatever.
They smile at each other.
Ratchet and Clank watch silently as the two ladies head to their respective ships. The enter them, they blast off, and they disappearing into the sky in opposite directions.
Ratchet looks at Clank. Clank looks at Ratchet.
RATCHET
We make a pretty good team.
CLANK
I would have to agree on that point.
RATCHET
So let's see if we can get this baby going!
CLANK
You are certainly back, Ratchet.
The two walk over to a metal, motorcycle-like aircraft vehicle. Clank grabs the vid-communicator screen and presses a few buttons, changing it into a checklist, while Ratchet fiddles with the vehicle.
CLANK
Fuel-lines.
RATCHET
Check.
CLANK
Horizontal stabilizers.
RATCHET
Check.
CLANK
Ion thrusters.
RATCHET
Looks like we got a tailwind. If we time it right, we could ride the slipstream of the grav-train past the Sea Green track—
CLANK
Ahem.
RATCHET
--launch the mag-grabler onto that headway overpass and slingshot right up to—
CLANK
Ratchet.
Ratchet waves Clank off.
RATCHET
The thrusters are fine, Clank. See?
He turns on the thrusts. They power on for a second then shut down with a puff a smoke. Clank gives Ratchet a look.
RATCHET
Er, don't worry! It's probably just a fused ion duct.
The Thug Leader laughs manically as his humvee approaches the Discovery crew, who are trapped under the hail of laser fire from his gattling gun.
Suddenly, they hear a scream.
COURTNEY GEARS (O. S.)
Get out of the way, Lardo!
THUG LEADER
Hey! Who you callin'—
He turns and sees Gears hustling towards him, complete with the Bio-Obliterator obliterating everything in its path.
The goons and robots scream and run all over the place in a mess of chaos and disorder.
THUG LEADER
Uh-oh.
He immediately stops firing and hops off the humvee. The ball runs over some of the goons and bots, leaving Gears and the Thug Leader the only ones running from it, Indiana-Jones style.
The Bio-Obliterator rolls towards the Discovery crew.
HELGA
Look out!
Sasha, Angela, Qwark, Al, Helga, and Skidd duck into the tiniest corners they can find as Gears, the Thug Leader, and the massive ball run past them. At the very end of the hall, the two jump into another side doorway as the ball rolls past them, into the wall—and through it.
It bowls through the wall, tearing a humongous hole into side of the stadium, into the outside world.
EXT. ENDAKO – DAY
The Bio-Obliterator rolls out into the streets, where pedestrians and cars and ships swerve out the way to avoid it.
It tumbles towards the dock and rolls right off it, splashing into the water, causing a huge tidal wave, splashing over the entire bay area, practically.
Gears and the Thug Leader peek out the hole, staring at the tremendous amount of damage.
THUG LEADER
Whew. Dat was a close one.
GALACTIC PRESIDENT (O.S.)
Freeze!
They look up and see a host of Galactic Rangers, piloting several heavily armed aircraft. The Galactic President sits within the main ship leading the armada.
The two criminals put their hands up as the ships land. Two rangers immediately jump out and arrest Gears and the Thug Leader. The Galactic President emerges from his ship and looks around.
Immediately after, Sasha comes sprinting out.
SASHA
Dad!
GALACTIC PRESIDENT
Sasha!
She runs over and gives him a hug hug. The rest of the crew stumbles out into the daylight. Behind them, a huge number of patrons rush out like a wave, fleeing for their lives.
A RANGER CONTROLLER with a loudspeaker tries to speak to the crowd.
RANGER CONTROLLER
Now, if we can all just form one line so we can take individual statements.
The entire crowd rushes past him as if he wasn't there.
ANGELA
Dude. Let it go.
The Ranger Controller sighs and looks dejectedly.
Suddenly, both Angela and Sasha turn towards the stadium.
ANGELA AND SASHA
RATCHET! CLANK!
The entire remaining group stares at the stadium. Waiting.
INT. MEGACORP MEGARUMBLE STADIUM – DAY
Ratchet stares down silently at the destroyed mess left by the Obliterator on his hoverboard.
He slowly turns around and gazes at the announce booth, directly at Drek.
Drek stares back. Neither says a word. Green eyes gaze hard into eyes of pure emerald.
Ratchet glides over to Drek, slowly at first, then with increasing speed. He grits his teeth, which becomes a growl.
Right as he gets near the booth, Drek whips out a massive gun from behind his back and fires a huge, explosive barrage of flames, tearing through the window like nothing.
The burnt remains of the hoverboard lands at his feet. Drek kicks it and looks out before him.
RATCHET
Hee-yah!
The Lombax falls down from above and gives Drek a powerful kick to his face, sending him flying across the room. Clank's rocket boosts slowly lower Ratchet onto his feet.
He picks up the dropped gun and walks over to Drek slowly, who's trying to crawl away.
DREK
I was just kidding, Ratchet! C'mon! It's all in good fun!
Ratchet has the look of death on his face as he steps closer towards Drek.
DREK
I have you want, Ratchet! It's all in this computer! Every single detail about the Lombaxes! What they stand for! Where they are now! Don't you want that? Don't you want to know where you come from? Who you are?
RATCHET
No. Not at your expense.
He raises his gun in the air.
QUICK FLASHES – RATCHET RELIVES THE GOOD MOMENTS
-- Ratchet and Sasha look at each other on Veldin.
SASHA
You are sure something special, Ratchet.
-- The Lombax whoops some Protopet butt on Veldin.
RATCHET (V.O.)
I know what I can do.
-- Ratchet and Angela look at each other at Qwark’s Hideout.
ANGELA
Like Lombaxes are built for action.
-- He performs some amazing feats to escape the rangers and goons on the Veldin powerlines.
RATCHET (V. O.)
I know what I'm capable of.
-- He talks with the New-Age Alien on Tebora.
NEW-AGE ALIEN
You will have to confront your worst enemy to find it.
-- He stares at his reflection on the windshield in his ship on Veldin.
-- He stares at his reflection in the oasis on Tebora.
RATCHET (V.O.)
I know who I am.
-- He and Clank cheer over defeating the fake Ratchet and Klunk on Tebora.
PROFESSOR VOICE (V.O.)
… to understand their role in galactic society.
-- Ratchet and Clank pilot the escape pod through the depths of space towards Endako.
-- Clank leans over and whispers into his ear on the platform in the MegaRumble Stadium.
INT. MEGACORP MEGARUMBLE STADIUM – DAY
Drek gawks up at the renewed and rejuvenated Lombax.
CLANK (V.O.)
This is what you were born for.
RATCHET (simultaneously)
This is what I was born for.
Drek frowns at that powerful statement. Ratchet stands above him.
The frown turns into a twisted, sadistic grin.
DREK
Then this is what you will die for.
He turns swiftly and slams on a huge red button behind him. The entire place begins flashing alarms and sirens blare into the air.
Drek begins to laugh. Louder. Louder. His laughter echoes all over as machines break apart and wires explode from the walls. Lights pop and the entire building begins to shake.
DREK (in creepy hysterics)
There's no central pad to press to save you from this, Lombax!
Ratchet backs up from Drek as a huge part of the scaffolding onto his vicinity, his form immediately disappearing underneath it. His laugh is still heard but the sirens drown it out eventually.
Ratchet sprints to the last remaining console and quickly starts typing in commands.
RATCHET
Clank! I can download the code off this machine! I can save her in time, and—
Clank places his hand on top of Ratchet's stopping him.
CLANK
We must let it go, Ratchet. She knows she must be destroyed. Her, and everything with her.
Ratchet and Clank look up at the massive green screen above them. Even as everything shakes and crumbles around them, the screen remains blank and silent. An understood calmness in the storm.
Clank hops onto Ratchet's back and the two hustle out of there.
EXT. ENDAKO - DAY
Rangers forcefully back up the crowd as huge chucks of the stadium begin to fall apart and rip at the seams. Giant fireballs propel from a number of sections. Metal debris rains down from the sky as the roof of the stadium collapse upon itself. The entire thing in time crumbles save for a few side walls and arches.
ANGELA
Ratchet!
The winds howl silently as Rangers and other uniformed personnel rush over with hoses, spraying water onto the burning wreckage. No movement is noticeable except for the flickering flames spread all over.
SASHA (to herself)
No….
Everyone around the wrecked stadium looks down, sad, and dejected. Helga and Big Al cry loud sobs against each other. Even Captain Qwark sheds a few tears.
SKIDD
Whoa! Dudes, look!
Everyone turns and looks up, From the darkness of one of the remaining archways, Ratchet and Clank walk out calmly. They're covered in soot and dirt, but are other wise fine.
The crowd erupts in cheers and applause. The two heroes smile and wave to the excited mass around them, enjoying the moment as much as they can.
Darla Gratch suddenly makes an appearance, zooming over with her CAMERAMAN.
DARLA GRATCH
Ratchet! Clank! Two heroes-turned-villains-turned-heroes have indeed done the impossible: dispatched the universe's most notorious criminals, stopped perhaps the most dangerous plot in all of super-villain history, and cleared his own name, all at the same time! What do you have to say for yourself?
She points the mic at them both. Ratchet tries to speak but can't catch his breath. Clank just coughs black smoke.
The Galactic President appears in a flash. He hugs the two against his chest.
GALACTIC PRESIDENT
I'd just like to say that I believed these two were innocent all this time. In fact, this was an all an undercover operation, designed by me, to expose Drek and his shenanigans!
Ratchet and Clank struggle to breathe in the President's arms.
GALACTIC PRESIDENT
Remember, a vote for me is a vote to be free!
CAPTAIN QWARK (O.S.)
Now, mister President…
He snatches the mic from Gratch's hand and talks directly at the cameraman's camera.
CAPTAIN QWARK
Don't forget, this amazing plan of yours was spear-headed by yours truly! Displaying amazing bravado and a keen sense of keenness, I first deduced easily that the Lombax couldn't have possibly—
GALACTIC PRESIDENT
--As I was saying, vote for me in the next election—
CAPTAIN QWARK
--that's Q-W-A-R-K. A lot of people misspell it with a U—
GALACTIC PRESIDENT
-- probably cause that's the way you're supposed to spell it! Now, remember, folks—
As the two fight and mug for the camera, Ratchet and Clank sneak off to the side, towards Angela and Sasha.
ANGELA
Aren't you going to fight for you dues?
RATCHET
Nah, they can have it. I don't need any attention right now.
Clank laughs his signature laugh.
SASHA
Look, Ratchet… we're sorry we never went after you after you left the Discovery.
ANGELA
Yeah. That was kind of a selfish thing to do.
RATCHET
No. It's all my fault. I'm sorry for bailing on you.
He looks to Sasha, Angela, and Clank.
RATCHET
I'm lucky to have you all as friends. Al, Helga, Skidd, and yes, even Qwark. Sometimes.
The three of them laugh as the Rangers clean up the mess and the President and Qwark fight it out.
The clanking noises of Clank's feet grow louder. He rushes out one of the bleacher doors and hustles through the crowds. The goons security sees him and tries to shoot him, but he's too small to hit.
He leaps over the edge of the walls and rockets over on to the platform where Ratchet lies.
CLANK
Ratchet… please. You must get up. Everyone here is depending on you.
RATCHET
I… I can't do it. I'm a failure. I screwed up everything.
CLANK
That is not true! You exposed Drek's and Nefarious's plans. You saved the galaxy countless times. You can do this.
RATCHET
Why bother? There's nothing left for me. I can't do it, and even if I could, it'd be for nothing.
CLANK
Ratchet…
Ratchet turns his head from Clank.
CLANK
I found her, Ratchet.
The Lombax turns his head towards Clank.
RATCHET
What?
CLANK
I found my mother. She controls this. She is what Drek used to frame you. She knows you, Ratchet. She knows the real you. She knows what Lombaxes all about.
Ratchet looks to Clank with a faint glimmer of hope in his eyes.
CLANK
You can do this, Ratchet. She told me to tell you this.
Clank leans into Ratchet's ear and whispers. Suddenly, his eyes pop open.
INT. MEGACORP MEGARUMBLE STADIUM – DAY
Ace Hartlight leaps and grabs hold of the edge of the platform with ease. He starts to lift himself up.
A pair of Lombax boots slam right against Ace’s face. Ratchet’s rocket-kick knocks Hartlight back to the ground, not before leaping off the robot and landing on the top edge of the walls.
Ratchet sprints across the walls, over all the traps, which elicits huge cheers from the captive audience.
An angry Ace begins firing laser shots at Ratchet, running along the ground. Skillfully the Lombax avoids every shot, leaping from wall to wall with the help of Clank’s rocket-blasts. The crowd goes nuts.
Drek watches the scene unfold in brooding silence. The clock reads thirty-three minutes. Nefarious scoffs.
NEFARIOUS
Enough of this! Gears! Finish him once and for all!
COURTNEY GEARS
What ever you say, snooky-wookums!
She hops back on her hoverboard and zooms back out into the battlefield. Nefarious calls out after her.
NEFARIOUS
Stop calling me that!
She rides the board out over towards two other FEMALE ROBOT DANCERS near the announcer booth. They hop on their own hoverboards and go racing into battle.
Meanwhile, Ratchet still moves quickly along the wall edges, Ace still on his tail. Gears and her cohorts tag along. A laser light show of firepower zooms past Ratchet and Clank on all sides.
He reaches the end of the wall and leaps crazy-high over the stadium walls, landing in the bleachers. Two guards try to shoot him, but he ducks, inadvertently making the guards shoot each other.
Ace leaps high into the air to reach Ratchet.
The Lombax turns around, dual armed with the fallen guards weapons.
Two powerful shots knock Ace out in mid-air, the robot slamming on his back with a powerful thud. Gears gasps.
COURTNEY GEARS
Like, annihilate him!
All three female robots begin blasting. Ratchet leaps high into the air and shoots Gears right off her board, who lands right on top of Ace. The Lombax pulls two swift moves and blast the other femme bots off as well.
The clock reads thrity-two minutes. Drek grits his teeth and yells into the mic loudly.
DREK
DROP THEM!
The voice echoes throughout the stadium. Sasha and Angela scream.
Ratchet acts FAST. He kicks the two free hoverboards into overdrive and knocks them hard towards the tubes. They zoom through the air, right as the platform beneath the ladies opens up.
They scream as they fall. The hoverboards speed over towards them at the same time.
They fall on the boards right before they disappear into the acid. The crowd goes wild.
Drek slams his fists hard against the console.
DREK
(to Nefarious) Fire the Bio-Obliterator! (to the Thug Leader) You! I want every goon, security personnel, robot—every plebian with a gun to kill that Lombax!
THUG LEADER
You got it!
He rushes out the room as Nefarious rubs his hands together.
NEFARIOUS
Ooooh, goodie! Time to bring this planet to my side! Lawrence! Give me the switch!
Lawrence hands him a device with a huge red button. Nefarious presses it.
In the center of the battle zone, the Bio-Obliterator charges itself up, glowing yellow, orange, and white.
SASHA (pointing at the Bio-Obliterator)
Ratchet!
Ratchet sees it, and turns his board, zooming towards it.
ANGELA
Behind you!
He turns and sees Ace running like a bulldozer through every trap and wall, ripping through everything like paper. On his shoulders sit Gears, dual-wielding a set of blasters on her own.
RATCHET (to Angela and Sasha)
Go rescue the rest of the crew! I'll handle this!
SASHA AND ANGELA
WHAT!?
RATCHET
Just go!
He zooms off towards the Bio-Obliterator. Sasha and Angela shrug at each other and dart off into the halls of the stadium.
At this point, every single enemy is trying to shoot Ratchet, thousands of laser shoots flinging through the air. But with impeccable, determined skill, he avoids every single one.
As he gets closer to the Bio-Obliterator, a huge, giant, armed robot with rocket-powered feet flies down, piloted by both Lawrence and Dr. Nefarious.
DR. NEFARIOUS
Now I shall have my revenge! Lawrence, destroy him!
The machine unloads a barrage of blasts at Ratchet, who zigs off course to avoid them.
The Bio-Obliterator grows brighter and brighter.
INT. MEGARUMBLE’S UNDERGROUND QUARTERS – DAY
Angela and Sasha race through the internal halls of the stadium.
ANGELA
Do you know where we need to go?
SASHA
If I remember the schematic correctly, it's over here!
She turns a corner and Angela follows. They eventually indeed reach where Qwark, Skidd, Big Al, and Helga are held captive.
BIG AL
Hey! Sasha! Angela!
SKIDD
Alright!
CAPTAIN QWARK
Boy am I glad to see you! I bet you're just as glad to see (flexes) me…
Everyone just looks at Qwark.
CAPTAIN QWARK
Er, sorry.
HELGA
Well, don't just float there! Get us out! Get us out!
SASHA
In one second.
She hops off her board and fiddles with the nearby controls. Angela leaps off hers as well, checking the areas around them. She turns a corner, and sees several goons and robots running towards them.
ANGELA
Looks like we got company!
SASHA
Just give me a minute…
Angela trips the first goon hard with a well-placed kick, and flips another over her back, throwing him into the robots. She grabs the dropped blaster off the ground and starts to provide cover fire.
ANGELA
Hurry!
A click is heard, and the gates open, freeing the crew from their prison!
SASHA
Got it!
They all rush out the jail, staying low to avoid the laser fire.
ANGELA
Grab a weapon, guys! We're gonna have to fight our way out!
All six members battle their way down the hall, picking up the dropped weapons and the laser fire continues.
Lasers volley back and forth as the crew duck, cover, and return fire.
Angela and Sasha end up back-to-back, picking off two good shots and nailing their enemies. They look at each other and share a smile.
THUG LEADER (O.S.)
Make way, boys! Time to test this baby out!
The goons and bots separate as the Thug Leader drives in on a humvee-like vehicle with a huge machine gun attached to the front.
THUG LEADER
Time to make you's into mince-meat, meat-heads! Heh. That was pretty clever.
The gattling gun winds up before unloading a high-speed barrage of laser shots, around a hundred shots per second! The crew duck around the corners as their surroundings are destroyed by the gunfire!
BIG AL
There's no way we can get past this thing!
The car drives closer to them, the rest of their enemies following behind it.
INT. MEGACORP MEGARUMBLE STADIUM – DAY
The Bio-Obliterator gains more and more energy as Ratchet works his way around the stadium to dodge the bullets, with Ace, Gears, and Nefarious' robot on his tail.
He surfs underneath the Bio-Obliterator, maneuvering carefully around the thick, metal support poles holding it up. Continuous laser fire blasts in his direction, many of them striking the poles and knocking them down.
Loud creaking is heard as the center structure begins to fall apart. The poles collapse and pieces break apart, but Ratchet skillfully avoids them with jumps, ducks, and dodges, clearly in his element.
In time the massive screen with the timer rips off and falls, tearing a hole in the bottom of the Bio-Obliterator, ripping it as bursts of electrical energy and exposed wires and hoses drop from the destroyed section.
Gears looks up, seeing the screen crumple towards her and Ace, the latter too busy shooting at Ratchet to notice. She leans over and gives Ace a kiss on the forehead.
COURTNEY GEARS
I don't think this relationship is going to work out. Hugs and kisses!
She jumps off and books it. Ace looks confused, but then looks up and sees the screen tumbling right towards him.
A high-pitched squeal emerges from his mouth, right before the screen crushes him flat.
Meanwhile, Nefarious' robot searches for Ratchet within the crumbling structure beneath the Bio-Obliterator, which still powers up, but is quivering atop the weakened structure.
DR. NEFARIOUS
Where are you, my little squishie friend? I want to make amends! And by that I mean I want to mend your entrails as a medal!
LAWRENCE
That was exceedingly gross, sir.
DR. NEFARIOUS
Yeah? You know, I was thinking that was a little overboard. How about 'I want to mend your face to the bottom of my foot'?
LAWRENCE
Poetic license is not your strong suit, sir.
As the two ramble on, Ratchet slips out in secret behind the Obliterator. Clank jumps off Ratchet and onto the back of the massive robot. He unlatches a compartment, exposing a glowing mechanical part, similar to an engine core.
He gives Ratchet the thumbs up. The Lombax grabs one the loose electric hoses dangling from the Bio-Obliterator.
He shoves the end of the hose into the engine core. The robot writhes and shakes powerfully as it's overloaded with excess energy, making it glow, the rockets going from red to blue to white.
Nefarious jumps and squeezes Lawrence and screams as the robot surges upward with a huge burst of speed and energy, ripping through the rest of the structure, exploding through the roof and blasting off into space.
The Bio-Obliterator begins to roll off its hinges, the massive ball bouncing off, explosions ripping from the outer walls as it powers down and shuts off, becoming nothing more than a deadly, unstoppable metal boulder.
It rolls onto the stadium floor and tumbles over the walls and traps like nothing. Gears screams and sprints as the Bio-Obliterator topples after her.
She ducks into the doorway leading underneath the stadium. The ball still goes after her, rolling through the walls, outer structure, and obstacles without even slowing down.
Ratchet surges into the gigantic, open field of the stadium around him. The air is alive with the deafening crowds, cheering and yelling frantically in unabashed excitement. Around him are the robotic remains of past warriors and destroyed weapons. In front of him, two giant robots clash in a heated hand-to-hand brawl.
On the other side of the field, high in the stands, within the announcer booth, Drek saunters in calmly, meeting with Nefarious, the Thug Leader, and Lawrence. The SCOREKEEPER ROBOT is also there, who seems to be tallying every blow the battling bots are giving each other down below.
DREK
I take it everything is ready?
Nefarious mumbles something unclear towards Drek.
DREK
What was that?
NEFARIOUS
I said everything is ready! You…
He trails off into another set of unclear obscenities.
Drek gives Dr. Nefarious a look before he turns to the scorekeeper.
DREK
These moronic excuses for Rock'em Sock'em Robots are still at it?
SCOREKEEPER ROBOT
Yep.
DREK
...blow them both up.
SCOREKEEPER ROBOT
Yep.
He presses a button on the console in front of him.
On the battlefield, the mechanical warriors suddenly start beeping. They look down at the small collars that they're wearing; a light flashes on them. The look at each other, helplessly, and give each other a hug while crying.
Their heads explode right off. The audience cheers even louder.
Drek grabs an intercom piece and starts to talk into it, which booms and echo all around the stadium.
DREK
Looks like we have a tie!
Cheers fill the air excitedly at that announcement.
DREK
But enough with the small fries, folks. It time for the main event! We at the Megacorp-Gadgetron Corporation have managed to acquire, for your entertainment, the most famous and infamous creature the galaxy has ever seen, the intergalactic hero-turned-public enemy number one: ladies and gentlemen, introducing Ratchet!
The crowd replies in a mix of gasps, applause, and boos as every single light and camera focuses on Ratchet, who has to squint. Cameras flash and camcorders roll, watching his every reaction. His horrified face is even on the big screen.
DREK
Ratchet has… ahem, agreed to forgo a few years in prison to instead fight for life and death, all for you and your children!
The audience goes nuts.
DREK
And which of our sadistic gladiators will the Lombax be going up against? None of them! Instead, he will be going up a brand new enemy! A staple from many of your childhood pasts, coming back to right certain wrongs! Introducing Ace Hartlight two-point-O!
Ratchet's jaw drops as the crowds go wild. The whole battleground begins to shift now. Huge walls and deathtraps sprout from the walls and floors. Two massive tube-like structures slide out from the walls on opposite ends of the stadium. Electric wires, flamethrowers, spikes, sharpened pendulums—all sorts of dangerous torture devices spring up, including two boiling pots of acid under the tubes.
At the far end, a huge cage emerges from the ground upon a tower that rises into the air. Inside is ACE HARTLIGHT 2.0, a robotic version of a perfectly chiseled, handsome specimen of a man, with glowing read eyes.
He squeezes his cage bars, crushing the metal with ease. This makes the audience go crazy.
DREK
But that's not all, folks! Ratchet will have forty-five minutes to defeat Ace Hartlight. If he fails…
The numbers "45:00" appears on the corner of the big screen. Above that screen, however, rises what appears to be a giant, mechanical, miniature version of the Death Star. The audience oohs and aahs.
DREK
… that device, the Bio-Obliterator, created by the… uh… impressionable Doctor Nefarious, will turn you all into robots, where you will assist me in finishing my original plan of destroyed other planets to create another perfect planet, which I will exploit for my own gain and yadda, yadda, yadda. Don't bother to try and escape, or you will be shot. Thank you.
The audience gasps, although the robotic members still cheer and hoot.
DREK
And finally, just to up the ante, and just because I really don't care, at the thirty minute mark…
The two tubes suddenly shift open, revealing Sasha in one pole and Angela in the other. They bang at the glass, but are unable to escape. They are inaudible, but their eyes focus on the captured Lombax.
DREK
… Ratchet's two lovebirds will be dropped in two giant vats of boiling acid, forcing him to choose the one who he really pines for, and ignoring the one who he was just stringing along all this time. And that's if he can even get away to save them!
The audience is a mixed bag of emotions of cheers, yells, boos, and cries. Ratchet's concern is on the two females caught in their glass prison. The look on his face is of complete worthlessness.
DREK
It all boils down to this. Are you a hero, Ratchet? Or are you just a failure? Time will tell. Let's get it on!
Riding in on a flying hoverboard, Courtney Gears floats down onto the same platform that hosts the captured Ace Hartlight. She blows the robot a kiss before opening the gate, and a the machine comes sprinting out towards Ratchet, leaping over the walls and traps with ease.
Ratchet struggles in his chains as Ace pounds in closer and closer, his steps bending every metal platform he lands on. He leaps high into the air, over Ratchet's platform, and comes flying down, ready to crush the Lombax.
Suddenly, Ratchet's chains come loose. He immediately rolls off the platform as Ace lands on it, hard, ripping into the top like a wrecking ball. The crowd cheers as Ratchet lands on the ground, dodged a swinging sword from nowhere, and hauls tail through the maze of walls and traps.
INT. MEGARUMBLE’S UNDERGROUND QUARTERS – DAY
Elsewhere in the darkened corridors is a room with the rest of the captured crew of the Discovery—Skidd, Helga, Big Al, and Captain Qwark. Qwark, specifically, is playing a harmonica.
Clank, however, is a prison of his own—he's attached to some sort of containment device. His head and feet are plugged into this device, and his eyes are pure white.
INT. METAPHORIC COMPUTER WORLD – DAY
Inside Clank's head is another world, all green and composed mostly of lasers and circuitry. Clank, or a version of him, is stuck behind a set of green laser bars. Surrounding the bars is another set of robot ninja-pirates. One speaks, again, where his lips don't match his voice.
ROBOT NINJA-PIRATE
Arrg, matey! You won't be escaping this metaphorical representation of your computerized mental state. Ah-ha ha! Ha-ha! Ha!
CLANK
You are lucky these bars are here. You know I very well can take you all.
ROBOT NINJA-PIRATE
Ha-ha! Ha! Those bars are powered by the computer's mainframe! There is absolutely no way that they will ever go off, ever!
All the robot pirate-ninjas start laughing.
The bars suddenly turn off.
The robot pirate-ninjas stop laughing.
Clank gives them a "start running" look.
INT. MEGACORP MEGARUMBLE STADIUM – DAY
Ratchet leans up against a wall, tired and bruised, but otherwise still intact. He looks around, making sure no cameras or lights are focused on him.
The booming sounds of Ace's footsteps are heard nearby. Ratchet holds his breath. The steps slowly start to fade away. He releases the air from his lungs and turns the corner—
And runs right into Ace.
RATCHET
Whoa!
He ducks as Ace swings a massive punch, which tears a hole into the metal wall. The Lombax flees again, leaping over flames and avoiding spinning spikes; Ace, being a robot now, runs though it all without a scratch. He even pulls out a laser blaster now, firing endlessly at Ratchet.
The Lombax dodges the blasts, but barely. He struggles to run through his fatigue, but he keeps on going. He turns another corner and ducks down into a small trench. Ace stops running, looking left and right for him.
A whistle noise is heard. Ratchet looks up from his hiding place, and sees Courtney Gears on her hoverboard, pointing right at him.
COURTNEY GEARS
There he is, Acey-Poo!
Ace Hartlight groans and shakes his head, but then fires his blaster at Ratchet. He leaps out in the nick of time, and hustles out of there, Ace on his tail, Gears tracking him from above.
INT. METAPHORIC COMPUTER WORLD – DAY
A final punch knocks the metal teeth out of the remaining robot ninja-pirate. Clank is surrounded by a number of the unconscious machines. He wipes his hands cleanly.
CLANK
That was easy. Now, who would have released me from that cage?
There's a mechanical, computational sound that occurs behind Clank. He turns around. In the air floats a huge sequence of letters and numbers, flashing before his eyes. He scans them all, carefully, quickly. He gasps.
CLANK
Mom!
The coding sequence "opens" up like a door, revealing a giant green screen, completely blank save for a flashing cursor mark. CLANK'S MOM does not speak, but communicates through the text on the screen.
CLANK'S MOM
Hello, Clank.
CLANK
I cannot believe I found you. I mean the odds are astronomical. One billion, four hundred thirty-eight million, nine hundred fifty-six thousand, seven hounded and twelve to one, to be exact.
CLANK'S MOM
Precisely. It is good to see you, too, Clank. But, unfortunately, this cannot last. There is something you must do.
CLANK
What is it?
CLANK'S MOM
You must destroy me.
Clank gasps.
INT. MEGACORP MEGARUMBLE STADIUM – DAY
The timer ticks down to forty minutes.
Ratchet looks up at both Angela and Sasha. They're trying to be strong while confined but with each second they grow more and more worried. He can only return a helpless look, unable to do anything.
A massive blade flings by Ratchet, knocking him off his feet. He looks up, noticing Gears with a number of those blade-boomerang weapons. She starts tossing them like mad at the Lombax.
He jumps and leaps over each one before rushing out of her line of sight. He slides underneath another swinging pendulum, but is knocked hard against a wall by a swinging pole. Everything goes dizzy for him; he starts stumbling.
INT. METAPHORIC COMPUTER WORLD – DAY
Clank shakes his head wildly.
CLANK
But there must be some other option!
CLANK'S MOM
I have scanned every piece of my software. There is no other solution. Drek is using me for his purposes. The weapons in the stadium. The Bio-Obliterator.
Clank is hurt at the choice.
CLANK'S MOM
Do not worry. I will always be around, Clank. You once told me that you would try to make me proud.
Clank eyes look up at the screen in surprise.
CLANK'S MOM
You already have.
Clank smiles brightly at that message.
CLANK'S MOM
Ratchet is in great danger. He needs you. When I free you, Clank, you must tell him this message, for he is the only one that can save you all.
CLANK
Which message is that?
Clank reads what the screen displays. He nods.
Lights begin to surround Clank. Everything begins to go white.
INT. MEGARUMBLE’S UNDERGROUND QUARTERS – DAY
Clank's eyes slowly fade back to his traditional green color. The device trapping him recedes into the wall, freeing the little robot. He pushes himself up to his knees, then his feet, his face ready for action.
He sprints down the hall, little feet making clanking noises as he runs past the prisons with the rest of the Discovery crew.
HELGA
It's Clank! And he is free!
Helga, Big Al, Skidd, and Qwark call out to Clank.
CAPTIVE DISCOVERY MEMBERS
Hey! Clank! Save us! Get us out of here! Do you have the key! Open up these bars!
Clank runs right past.
CAPTAIN QWARK
Huh.
The crewmembers stare at the disappearing Clank blankly.
INT. MEGACORP MEGARUMBLE STADIUM – DAY
Ratchet is done. Mentally.
Huffing and puffing as he holds his stomach and barely trots through the death course, the Lombax has nothing left. He leans against the wall, holding his weakened self up. The time reads thirty-six minutes.
A small, round, blinking device lands at Ratchet's feet. His eyes go wide and he tries to climb the wall to escape it.
It explodes and sends Ratchet flying through the air. The entire audience gasps as he lands hard onto the platform sporting Ace's cage.
Drek's laughter is heard through the intercom, all around the stadium.
DREK
It looks like it's all over for you, Ratchet. Do feel that? That humiliation? That pain?
Drek's voice grows angrier as he speaks.
DREK
That was my pain! That was my humiliation! I want you to feel every single sensation I felt that day you stopped me. You are a failure, Ratchet! And now, everyone knows!
Dr. Nefarious and the Thug Leader look at each other.
DR. NEFARIOUS
Whoa. And I thought I hated the little furball. That guy's off his rocker.
LAWRENCE
It takes one to know one, sir.
DR. NEFARIOUS
You're telling me. Wait, what?
THUG LEADER
Whatever, I'm just in it for the bolts.
Drek watches the barely mobile Ratchet with a quiet glee.
The Lombax is indeed feeling those sensations, with those hot lights, floating cameras, and awe-struck spectators helplessly watching.
Ace Hartlight 2.0 approaches the platform slowly, taking his time to reach him. Country Gears smirks, and flies over towards the announcer booth, to watch the final blow with the rest of Ratchet's enemies.
To the Lombax, there is no sound, no noise, no anything. He can barely move, his face frozen in the full realization of absolute disappointment.
QUICK FLASHES – RATCHET RELIVES TRAGIC MOMENTS
-- He sees his sad face within the oasis
-- He records his message to the camera to the Discovery crew
-- He sees the disappointed looks of all his friends on Barlow
-- He reflects on the dream he had on the escape pod
SLIM COGNITO (V.O.)
Anyone can fall from grace, but it takes a particularly special someone to bring their friends down with them.
-- He witnesses the helpless faces of Sasha and Angela.
INT. MEGACORP MEGARUMBLE STADIUM – DAY
Ratchet slowly closes his eyes. He lets out a breath as if it was his last one.
This next couple of scenes were a little tricky, and I'll have to really work to fix them up, so feedback on these will be most requested. If you every seen Gladiator, Sleepy Hollow, Lucky Number Slevin, or the Saw movies, they have these flashes, these moments of reflection, like really quick flashbacks. They're called "Quick Flashes" according to The Screenwriter's Bible, but I'm not sure if they're formatted correctly, as the book doesn't exactly explain it in detail. I'll need to purchase a screenplay from those movies and compare/contrast.
Right now, though, if things make sense here, just let me know if you can. Thanks!
A groggy Lombax slowly awakens to find himself in chains. Green eyes look around as the Lombax's location slowly comes into a clear view—refurbished prison quarters. Cozy, with beds, benches, and lockers, but complete with jail bars, massive metal gates, and security cameras.
As his surroundings come into focus, he realizes that Dr. Nefarious, Lawrence and the Thug Leader are standing in the background. They wave at him.
Suddenly, Drek's face comes right into view, up close and personal.
DREK
Hello, Ratchet. I have to admit I expected you three hours ago.
RATCHET
Huh? What? What's going on?
He struggles in his chains.
RATCHET
Where's Clank? Where's my crew?
DREK
My dear Lombax, I think you have more pressing matters to consider than the location of your sorry excuse for friends.
RATCHET
You--!
Ratchet tries to attack Drek but can't. All three villains laugh.
THUG LEADER
Looks like you's stuck between a rock and uh… um… er…
LAWRENCE
A hard place, perhaps?
THUG LEADER
Hard place? Dat don't make no sense. Stupid robot.
DR. NEFARIOUS
What!? You dare speak ill of the robot race! Once I am done here, you squishes will be nothing more than an organic ooze used to lubricate trash compactors!
THUG LEADER
Ya. Sure. Whatever. It's good t' have goals, I suppose.
DR. NEFARIOUS (furious)
Oooooo--!
He snaps in anger, but completely freezes, triggering his head to elicit a soap opera show, where a SOAP OPERA ACTOR and a SOAP OPERA ACTRESS speak their horrid parts.
SOAP OPERA ACTOR
-- to leave you again. But I must! For you see, I have another lover!
SOAP OPERA ACTRESS
But you cannot! For you see, I am that same lover!
LAWRENCE
Oh, dear, you've done gone and riled him up a bit.
Drek and Ratchet just stare at all this.
DREK
Are you done?
LAWRENCE
In one moment, Mister Drek.
Lawrence slaps Dr. Nefarious hard, knocking him out of his trace and putting him back into his rant mode.
DR. NEFARIOUS
--oooooo! Mark my words, you filthy, air breathing waste receptacles, after the day is over—
DREK
Nefarious, I am having a moment here—
DR. NEFARIOUS
-- I swear on the race of my own kind you will be completely and utterly annihilated off the face of the universe! Everyone single one of you!
Drek looses his cool.
DREK
Now listen to me you fake, pathetic pile of gears! You have the audacity to speak on the behalf of robot kind? You were nothing but moronic, failed, living mad scientist who was embarrassingly dispatched by Captain Qwark, of all people! You became a robot by pure dumb idiocy. So if you do not shut up this instant I will make it my personal mission to make sure every robot in the entire universe knows about your embarrassing secret, forcing you to return you that asteroid that I saved your wretched, feeble behind from!
Nefarious is absolutely dumb-stricken silent.
The Thug Leader tries to stifle his laughter.
LAWRENCE
I believe you have just been p-owned, sir.
DR. NEFARIOUS
LAWRENCE!
The robot waiter and blue skin creature just break in hysterics.
DR. NEFARIOUS
I'll just go and prepare everything upstairs. Join me when you stop giggling like fools!
Nefarious storms off in a huff. The Thug Leader and Lawrence follow, still laughing crazily.
Drek rolls his eyes.
DREK
As you can most likely tell, Ratchet, it was me who put this entire plan together.
RATCHET
Plan?
Drek grins. He turns around and faces the Lombax up close.
DREK
You haven't figured it out yet? Tisk, tisk, Ratchet. Maybe you have been out of it recently, cause people are always trying to kill you.
Ratchet looks at Drek closely.
QUICK FLASH - RATCHET REMEMBERING – DAY
-- Ratchet sits in the Gadgetron office during his job interview.
RATCHET
Uh… no. I've been out of it, recently. Cause people are always trying to kill me.
INT. MEGARUMBLE’S UNDERGROUND QUARTERS – DAY
Drek smiles at Ratchet's facial expressions as the Lombax begins to remember.
DREK
I've realized something, Ratchet, while I was in jail.
Drek's face moves in closer.
FLASHBACK – DREK IN PRISON – DAY
Drek is adorned in orange prison clothes. His eyes are glued to the TV screen, watching some sort of game show battle, where Ratchet is shooting and blowing up robot enemies left and right.
DREK (V.O.)
Pondering so long how you could have stopped me. Then Qwark and the Thug Leader. And Nefarious. Entire armies of goons, Blargians, Tyrranoids, and robots. And then, while I watched you during your stint in Dreadzone, it hit me.
Drek's eyes shimmer with a stroke of realization.
INT. MEGARUMBLE’S UNDERGROUND QUARTERS – DAY
Drek glares at Ratchet, right in the eye.
DREK
You're not normal. You're different. I needed to know about you. I needed to understand you.
Ratchet says nothing, but his breathing grows slightly heavier.
FLASHBACK – DREK EXPLORES DREDZONE REMAINS – NIGHT
Drek sits in the back of a limo-ship, staring at the floating remains of what looks to be an outer space stadium. Hovering, destroyed bleachers, seats, food stands, robot parts, ship parts, lights, and other debris fill the vacuous space.
DREK (V.O.)
Clearly you can't just finish off someone like you by throwing a bunch of bullets and explosions at you. No. You would have to be disposed of another way. A businessman must always prepare.
Drek squints carefully as he sees the remains of a complex ship compartment, filled with ruined computer equipment and machines.
DREK (V.O.)
Gleeman Vox had one heck of system going. He was using technology that was beyond the scope of this universe, most of it just plain illegal. But very, very powerful.[/i]
Drek grins.
FLASHBACK – SALVAGING DREADZONE – NIGHT
The area of space is now filled with robots and creatures in space suits, busily organizing and restructuring the debris, using large ships and crane-like aircraft to haul the parts around.
DREK (V.O.)
I put quite a bit of bolts into exploiting Dreadzone capabilities. I hired the Thug-4-Less goons to assist, and even managed to find that worthless Nefarious floating helplessly on a rock.
Dr. Nefarious and Lawrence work on the mechanical panel against a partially destroyed satellite system. Lawrence hands Dr. Nefarious a few tools as the robot scientist fiddles with the wiring.
Nefarious is suddenly shocked by a huge current and freezes again, with a goofy look on his face. The wiring lights up though, and the satellite dish begins to move. Lawrence gives a thumbs up—
-- to Drek, who is inside a nearby ship, a more complex, larger one, complete with a series of consoles and computers all its own. Drek proceeds to fiddle with the controls, the satellite rotating slowly as the signals it receive trigger several different "channels" that flash across the screen.
One channel involves two robots hitting each other. Another has a Blargian walk into a room and trip over an Ottoman. Another channel shows Captain Qwark using a Crotchetizer on himself.
Drek flinches at that one and changes the channel again.
DREK (V.O.)
And then, I found it. The story of the Lombax.
On the screen is a shot of a number of Lombaxes interacting. Drek smiles widely.
INT. MEGARUMBLE’S UNDERGROUND QUARTERS – DAY
Ratchet's jaw drop at Drek.
DREK
Yes, Ratchet. Everything about you. How you work, how you think, how you act. I was generous enough to give you a little taste of itt.
The Lombax's breathing grows heavier.
QUICK FLASHES – RATCHET AND THE LOMBAX MEDIA
-- Ratchet struggles at the controls on his escape pod, trying to receive the signal.
-- Ratchet stares through the windshield of the Discovery at the Lombax video before him.
INT. MEGARUMBLE’S UNDERGROUND QUARTERS – DAY
Ratchet's eyes grow angry with a twinge of pain.
RATCHET
You…
DREK
Yes, Ratchet, me. And it was me who put this plan together. To frame you. To ruin you. To make you into nothing. If I couldn't finish you physically, I'd have to do it mentally.
Drek reaches out and pinches Ratchet's cheek. The Lombax jerks his face away.
QUICK FLASHES – DREK REVEALS THE PLAN'S DETAILS
-- Drek shakes hands with Fizzwidget in a crowded press conference.
DREK (V.O.)
I rebuilt Gadgetron and Megacorp from the ground up. I brought along Nefarious and the Thug Leader as well.
-- Scientists inject the Protopet with something.
DREK (V.O.)
I had the Protopet rewired per my specifications—
-- Ratchet fights off the Protopets on Veldin.
DREK (V.O.)
To attack only you, at the perfect moment.
-- The Lombax sleeps in his bed on Veldin. Outside his house, goons run around and place several cages with Protopets locked inside. Another goon slips into Ratchet's ship and removes the engine.
DREK (V.O.)
All placed while you slept, probably dreaming about your miserable existence at that point.
-- Ratchet and Sasha watch the video of the fake Ratchet planting bombs in the Gadgetron basement.
DREK (V.O.)
Nefarious built the perfect fake Ratchet to frame you, knowing full well—
-- The Lombax turns and run from the accusations on Veldin.
DREK (V.O.)
-- you'd run and fight for yourself, bring everyone down with you.
-- A saddened Ratchet speaks on videotape to the entire Discovery crew.
DREK (V.O.)
Your every move was a predictable as if written by a hack writer. Plus, it helped that I was tracking the Discovery. After all, who do you think sold it to Slim? Indirectly of course.
-- Slim Cognito on Obani speaks with Ratchet.
SLIM COGNITO
You'll be surprised what was left over after the Dreadzone incident.
DREK (V.O.)
He had no idea. Neither did you.
-- Ratchet flies the escape pod through space.
-- He crash-lands on Tebora's desert landscape.
-- He looks at himself in the water's reflection in the oasis.
-- He fights his robot counterpart within the outskirts of the cave.
DREK (V.O.)
Your every move was planned. Tracking Gears, fighting off the Galactic Rangers, running away like some sniveling, guilty wuss – oh, yes, that Lombax footage that you thought would help you, would save you, ended up being your very demise.
Ratchet screams.
INT. MEGARUMBLE’S UNDERGROUND QUARTERS – DAY
The Lombax pulls himself at the chains, furious, hurt, suffering from what he heard. He growls to Drek.
RATCHET
You got me! You happy now? Huh! Finish me then! Why don't you just end it right here, right now!?
Drek responds, perfectly calm.
DREK
Oh, Ratchet, I would love nothing more than to crush you in the palm of my hand. But I have better plans for you. You think it hurts now. Just you wait. I want to see you suffer to the very, very end.
Drek grins sickly, evilly, before he turns around and heads upstairs, leaving the Lombax alone to his thoughts.
An eerie silence fills the room. The only noise is the crackled breathing from Ratchet's mouth.
Suddenly, the platform he's on raises upward life a lift. He looks around in a panic as a set of massive doors open above him. A huge, bright light glares his vision as he's rises into the open air.
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about me
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Kevin Johnson is planning to take over the internet one small blog at a time. A Dartmouth grade with a penchant for having fun, drinking, and all things entertaining, Kevin will do his finest to add thoughtful, insightful looks at gaming and video games in general-- but do not worry, he can be just as snarky as the rest of the internet, 4chan excluded.
This person mainly has a "professional" blog at www.totalmediabridge.com; by "professional," he means it doesn't make money and it's really just a general showcase of his writing skill and blogging ability. In due time, however, he will improve it immensely in the months to go, along with a nice, super-secret project in the works. Stay Tuned!
Unfortunately, he isn't into the new gen-systems, because he can't afford them at the moment, due to the bad economy and student loans. But he still games when he can, mostly the unplayed favorites of the previous generation, and at the very least tries to stay current on what's going on, news wise.
So keep your eyes peeled for some particularly interesting stuff in the next year or so!
I'm currently in the process of writing a Ratchet & Clank screenplay exclusively for Destructoid! It takes place between R&C4: Deadlocked (the last PS2 game) and R&C: Tools of Destruction (the first PS3 game). I know fan fics tend to get pushed aside as lame, but so far the criticism has been positive, so hopefully if you do decide to read this, you won't sigh in annoyance.
Destructoid is an independently-run publication forged by our love of video games and the gaming community's need of accountable enthusiast press living the dream since March 16, 2006
