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[ itemforty's blog ]



You want some Pants? I know you do!
itemforty | 10:15 AM on 05.26.2008 21 comments




Hey guys, Ashtray Kelldorf here.

I am having a Spring Cleaning Sale™ on Ebay® and wanted to make sure to spread the knowledge to everyone possible.

You can call me a whore if you want, but let me say one thing:

I had to sell my 360 because I'm so poor.

So stop judging me and look through my auctions to see if you like anything. If you buy things [that you might need [like pants]] then I can possibly buy another 360 so I can have fun again.

Please?

Also, cocks.


Seriously though, fellas, if you don't own a pair of 7's, you are totally missing out. I know it might look like a fuck ton of money for a pair of pants but I swear to Jim that 7's are the most comfortable pair of pants you will ever own... and they fucking last forever... and I get fucking compliments on them all the time. Seriously. Girls fucking love a guy in designer jeans, mostly because they actually fucking fit us correctly without being baggy in the inner-thigh. Must be good because I get compliments all.the.time. I mean, I don't really care since I already know that I'm fucking awesome but whatever.



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21 comments | showing # 1 to 21

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-D-'s Destructoid Blog
If I win the pants, do you come with them?
itemforty's Destructoid Blog
You know I can't answer that question under these terms.
the GAMEGOBLIN's Destructoid Blog
I need SHIRTS.
BluDesign's Destructoid Blog
Do these come in FAT MAN sizes?

I need a XXFat pair of socks, and a XXXPhat piece of bling.
Samit Sarkar's Destructoid Blog
I think the most expensive pair of jeans I own cost $60, but my mom really splurged on that one. I don’t like to spend more than $50 on any particular article of clothing. Then again, I’m a poor college student with a terrible fashion sense, so...
DJDuffy 's Destructoid Blog
sweet! do they come in "girl's skinny jeans?"
Samit Sarkar's Destructoid Blog
Sadly, I no longer fit in “girl’s skinny jeans”. Perhaps a few years ago...but college has inflated my belly due to laziness and beer.
Mxyzptlk's Destructoid Blog
Are these magical pants that will fit anyone and strength our bond of womanhood? If so, can I be the blonde that bangs the dude at soccer camp and feels like shit about it afterwards?

MaxVest's Destructoid Blog
You told me over the internet that you weren't wearing pants, and here I find that you may have in fact been wearing expensive stylish pants.
Justice's Destructoid Blog
@ MaxVest
BETRAYAL!

Sorry to hear about the 360 dude, Britney needs pants!

bottled dark's Destructoid Blog
your banner makes me respect you in so many ways.
MechaMonkey's Destructoid Blog
@Mxy

I you believe in yourself and try hard enough, you can be anything you want. Go get 'em, Tiger.
Mxyzptlk's Destructoid Blog
Awesome, soccer camp here I come!
Professor Pew's Destructoid Blog
Do they come pre-worn in all ways possible?
liam2015's Destructoid Blog
Are there gonna be any 'surprises' in the pockets?

If so, yes please.
itemforty's Destructoid Blog
@Pew

No, they aren't retarded. They are just fit for humans, unlike normal jeans that are fit for Americans.

@liam

I will 'accidentally' forget my penis in the back left or right pockets (depending on which you use for your wallet).
itemforty's Destructoid Blog
@Max

Ok, you got me... I am actually selling my pants because I felt bad for lying to you. I'M DOING THIS FOR BOTH OF US.
masterledz's Destructoid Blog
Damn, that X-Arcade stick I believe is pretty expensive, here's hoping you get a pretty penny for it.
blehman's Destructoid Blog
Mmmmmmmmm.......pants....
BlindsideDork's Destructoid Blog
I bought pants tha tlook like that..$14.
itemforty's Destructoid Blog
No you didn't!


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 about me



Name: Travis
Dtoid name: itemforty
XBL: itemforty
Location: Austin, Tx
Likes: Space Balets, sugar, Win7, Katamari Damacy.
Dislikes: purple, hotmail.com, myspace.com
Little known fact: I invented Spam™.
Favourite type of meat: Spam™
Fighting Style: Leather
Blood Type: LoneStar®

Stuff:
You people are good people and I like seeing you kiss (on camera).

[embed]89105:11898[/embed]

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