This past weekend marks the third year of Philidelphia's VGXPO, a Poor man's E3, which is understandable since Philidelphia is a poor man's LA.
I had never heard of this expo prior to finding an ad for it on the ground.
Let me share my tale with you.
10 am: I am boarding the train from camden to philidelphia, I take my seat and I find a newpaper. I picked it up because I saw that "Broken Social Scene" was playing in the city, so I attempted to flip to that page, but I ended up flipping to the "Transexual personal ads". I knew something was up. I looked around and noticed people staring, THEN I saw an ad for "hairspray" and thought to myself
"Oh Dear God"
Turns out I was reading "Gay Pulse" Philly's number one gay newspaper (I know this because it told me so). Now I couldn't simply put it down, for fear that someone would see what I had been reading and hit me with a "EWWW NIGGA YOU GAY!" and I couldn't keep reading for fear that someone would be see what I was reading and hit me with a "EWWW NIGGA YOU GAY". SO I put it in the guy next to me's bag. He was homeless, so It was like I was giving him a house, which no man can deny the gift of a house. so off I went to the expo.
11.am: They are giving away POSTAL THE MOVIE shirts and bag. And thus my swag quest begins.
11:30: the doors open up and me and 2 other dudes walk in. I get my ID badge, and I shuffle over to the Computers set up running CRYSIS and sepnd about an hour cutting down trees with a machine gun. really it should just be called "lumberjack", because that is the only think fun about it. Then I spy an arcade cabinet running Ikaruga out of my perif and waltz on over to that machine.
12:30:
SWAG CHECK IN:
Got an Alienware shirt, and ECA shirt, a Panasonic bag and shirt, a DEATHNOTE shirt
some faggot from a gaming blog of some sort (I'm guessing Screwattack) is filming things and is attempting to be funny. He asked me if DDR was hard. I lol'd because he said hard and then walked away from this strange homosexual. Competed in a Team fortress tourney, Won a 100 dollar LOGITECH mouse and a ALIENWARE game comtroller.
1:30: at the cosplay area. Fat chicks dressed as Sora etc. etc. the usual. went over to the guitar HEro 3 booth and participate in a tournament. LOST HORRIBLY. I began to think then and there how badass it would be to offer the original "power rangers" theme song as a downloadable song.
Saw faggot from game site again. Still don't know what site he's from. probably will never know.
3:00 almost ready to leave. On my way out I happen to see a BIG ASS TRAILER that has rockband written on it. Playable Rockband inside. I begin to wonder how I missed this big ass trailer. So I go inside and paly it.
I do not like Rockband very much.
The Guitar, is just like Guitar HEro, just not as good, the singing is jsut like Kareoke Revolution, just not as good, and the drums... well the drums are boring. Oh well, it'll still sell millions.
4:00 after an hour of Rock Band I go home. I'm tired. Takes nap.
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3 am: *FapFapFap*
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longest thing ever written.
Ever.
hawt. double hawt.