This is in response to this article I found at GamePolitics.com.


[photo courtesy of torokun]

So, not to sound all snobby and elitist, but politicians are the fucking suck when it comes it video games. And I'm not taking sides on which party is more the fuck dumb because to me the only difference when it comes to video game regulations and politicians is the amount of bullshit being thrown at citizens. On the Democrats side we have newly elected Secretary of State Hilary "MAN-MEAT NOM-NOM" Clinton and newly denounced Ron Blaglagalovogovich speaking about the ills of video games. And on the Republican side we have Lacks A Job-son- I mean Sacks Lovesum-I mean Jack Thompson-I mean Stupid Douche Attorney That Won't Fuck the Shut Up. And of course, the Republicans have the man, the myth, the legend, Governor of California, Mr. Arnold Schwarzenegger.


[image courtesy of my unparalleled skills in paint]

This past Friday the 9th Circuit Court has, again, rejected a statue proposed by the state of California to ban the selling of violent video games to minors. Now, while it is good that the court has struck down the appeal, there is still a potential shitshow amidst the situation. The Govenator still does have the power to bring this case the Supreme Court if he so chooses.

However, if that does happen, the chance of it being passed is still very low. There are a lot of things that the law would have to prove. Such as substantial government interest, which no appeal has been able to do yet. And since this isnt the first time a state has tried to pass an anti-violent video game law and failed, I doubt California will be any different. True, they do have this fucking guy as their Governor, but then again, they also have this fucking guy as their Governor. So I don't think he'll have that much influence.

Now, as a gamer and as a young adult, I understand why adults of past generations don't like video games. It's the same thing our parents' generation went through with movies and music. Back in the 60's and 70's, movies were breaking into taboo subjects that many older folks thought would corrupt and ruin the minds of the youngin's. In the early 90's we saw this same thing with the rap musics 'dem damn kids listen to. Today, it's video games. Now while Mortal Kombat and Doom were pretty prevalent in the advent of all this superfluous nonsense, the heavy stuff didnt come around until Mr. Bigshot GTA San Andreas had to be a show-off and have a hidden sex game. Fucking Rockstar...so damn wild....so damn talented. And since mainstream music today sounds like cats killing themselves while simultaneously scratching dinner plates with forks, and since film today is made up of nothing but rehashed versions of classics, video games became the central target for concerned mothers, politicians and fucking Scientologists. OK so maybe the last one doesn't really belong...but god damn it I hate that bullshit religion.



But Soccer Moms, Lawyers, Politicians, Scientologists...these people aren't the real problem here. No. The real problem and the cause for all this commotion is you, Michael...(OK so it's not really Michael's fault, I just thought it'd be really freaky for anyone reading this named Michael).

Anyway, my point is, the real problem are the young gamers of today. Today, the gaming community has expanded so much anyone ranging from the age of 10 to 40 are active. And I don't mind that. What I do mind is little Johnny Peepants bitchin' and moanin' to him Mom about the new BloodyFuck Fest FPS that's coming out on the 360 next week. So Mom, being the lovable woman she is, takes her bitchy son to the store to let him get it. And what does she see when the kids playing it later? This shit. I'm not saying little kids shouldn't be playing online, but I do think parents should just know what they're little angel is getting into before he starts crying and whining and cursing because he can't win any matches. It's situations like these that start the snowball effect that have the potential of ending at the Supreme Court.

So to all you youngin's out there just starting to play online, watch yourself. Because for every 12 year old gamer out there that's either being "pwned because he's a n00b" or "pwning n00bz" himself, there's a middle aged Mom that sees some vigilant, abrasive politician willing to fight for her "troubled little boy."



This graph is an accurate representation of how much Pwnage has increased as the popularity of online gaming has also increased. If this continues, the pwnage to noobs ratio will be so astronomically high, no court in the world will be able to stop it. Soccer Moms across the country will be livid with concern. If that happens, then may God help us all...