So today I got a magazine in the mail and I'm a little confused. Now if this were about 7 months ago while I was still subscribed to both EGM and Game Informer, it wouldn't have been a big deal. However, my subscription to Game Informer has since expired and the paper-ink love fest that was EGM magazine has been terminated. So I haven't had a magazine sent to me in over half a year. Hence my confusion when I was sent the May 2009 issue of Maxim with the ever-so-lovely Jennifer Love Hewitte quite literally busting off the cover.



Now, I have no problem receiving a free issue of Maxim in which skimpy pictures of both Jennifer Love Hewitt and that hot chick from the Fast and the Furious can be found. However, I did become slightly arous-I mean, confused when I was drooli-looking at the cover of the magazine and found a note covering the better parts of Ms. Love-Hewitt's already extraordinary body. The note was from EGM and it was informing me that the January 2009 issue of the magazine had been canceled due to, you know, its death. And in order to make up for this, they sent me the May 2009 issue of Maxim. The sentiment, while awesome, left me bewildered and with better fitting pants.

Many questions went through my head: why would they send me the issue now? Do they realize that EGM was canceled six months ago? Why would they send me a month old issue of Maxim? What does Jennifer Love Hewitt look like naked? What does Jennifer Love-Hewitt look like naked and covered in whipped cream? What does Jennifer Love-Hewitt look like naked, covered in whip cream and eating a suggestively large Popsicle? When did I suddenly go from wearing boxers to briefs?

As you can see, the entire event was hard on me. I mean it just erected all types of problems after it happened. My little head was throbbing with confusion...I have a boner.