[FTS NOTE: Ok, so god damn fucking AD at the top of the page, which doesnt show in the pic, keeps expanding every time I roll over and I just wanted to mention how fucking irritating that is.]


[unless this is what is meant by a video game movie, I don't want to see it]


So yeah, this is going to be another rant about how Hollywood is ruining games and how the newly announced Shadow of the Colossus movie is going to blow harder than hammered didgeridoo-playing hooker during a breathalyzer test. And she's not blowing the breathalyzer, if you know what saying...she's blowing the cop.

Anyway! Extensive metaphors aside, I believe this SOC movie is a problem for the same reason I believed the Watchmen movie was a problem. I'll admit, some games would work well as movies. Others, not so much. SOC is one of the "other" games.



Like Watchmen to comics, SOC did something in the video game media that hasn't been done before and probably will never be executed as well ever again. [side note: i'm actually glad this movie was announced on a purely a journalistic level because i planned to write an blog about SOC anyway.] There are many things to love about SOC: the music, the atmosphere, the beautiful graphics (that are still incredible), the overall opened ended-ness of the story. Everything about it is so physical and engaging, it's hard not to get swept up in it's majesty. And dont get me wrong, it does have potential as a movie. However, I feel like this movie will just be thrown to the wayside and delivered with such lividity and haphazardness that it won't do SOC justice.



Now, I'm a firm believer that there hasn't really been an amazing video game movie made yet, and I'm also a firm believer there never will be. And I'm ok with that. I don't think making video games into movies is something that really needs to happen. Video games are cinematic enough and interactive enough that making them into a movie just betrays and simplifies the experience for people. Something gets lost in the translation from game to movie and leaves the movie feeling cheap or..well...this...or...this...or....well...this. (Although I have to admit, using Snap's "The Power" in the Super Mario Bros. trailer was pretty tight).

And this will happen with SOC. That game is so voluptuous and has such a jarring grandeur, translating it to the silver screen will be disingenuous no matter how it's made. Viewers won't feel the excitement of actually controlling Wander as he scales the tremendous colossi. They won't feel the awkward, uncomfortable mix of accomplishment and sympathy a player feels as they deliver the final fatal lunge from their sword and watch the behemoth-sized beast somberly stumble to its death. Perhaps with the right direction, this deviant experience can be delivered to some degree that it was in the game. But no one will be able to capture it like it is in the original format. It's just too extraordinary.



The other main problem about SOC being made into a movie is it's story. In the game, ambiguity and intrigue cloud the story of SOC, leaving much of it left in the players hands for interpretation. I LOVED this about the game. Forget the brilliant soundtrack, the thick mechanics, the absolute sheerness of the game. If there was one thing that burrowed that game into my heart, it was the nostalgic, simplistic storyline of: Here's your character, here's your sword, here's your horse, there's the enemy, GO! It was a call back to simpler days of gaming where we didn't need shallow plots or flashy gimmicks, we just needed a base story about love or hate or revenge, and we were happy. The game is about how far one will go for those they love, and nothing more. Fuck all the theories about the in's and out's of the game. When it comes down to it, it's simply about this lovestruck Romeo that needs to save his Juliet no matter what the cost. And THAT is what I love about the game. It's absoluteness. It's quaint, unquestionable certainty that this what you're doing, and this is why. And to make that into a movie will undoubtedly shed light on parts of the story that remain a mystery and ought to be left that way. Explaining who Wander really is or what really happens to him or how Mono died would just detract for the majesty of the game.



And I'm sure other fans think this way too and have ranted on their own blogs about it, but I think it needs to be reiterated over and over until people truly understand why making THIS game into a movie really and wholly is a bad choice. Let Jake Gyllenhaal run around pretending to be a Persian Prince that can stop time. Let Uwe Boll slowly annihilate every already shitty game in the market [except you sir, you went down like a champ]. I'm OK with another Doom being made or another Resident Evil being made because those games are well-known enough that people who have never even played the games understand that what they're watching is a really shitty representation of them. But for a game like SOC, it's too indie to made into a film. Like Watchmen, people wont appreciate the film version because they dont fully understand what is going on. And that is such a shame. Also like Watchmen, SOC is brilliant and timeless, and it will influence games long after it's fucktastic movie counterpart is made. So please, Hollywood, leave that game alone. Go revamp some shitty horror film from the 70's and let us have our beloved game.