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[profile art by eBoy.]

GREGATRON. half man, half machine, half champion...all American.




Interests. wall ball, throwing knives into heaven, Guitar Heroing, training to be a Ninja Warrior, bagels, fighting russell crowe, learning a perfect new zealand accent, finding a way to stop department stores, outrunning cheetahs, being an active member in the Steve Zissou Life Aquatic Society, becoming a jedi, having a real-life montage,resurrecting Saturday morning cartoons, giant robots, writing to destroy, david carradine
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E.C.Gach
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Dance, Dance Dragonball Evolution
gregatrons | 12:22 PM on 04.13.2009 16 comments


So....shit.



[fair spoiler warning for all...if you care.]

OK, let's do this. First, let me just say that I am a gigantic fan of DBZ. I know a lot of people find it childish and boring and long and yeah, yeah. I know and I agree. The show, nowadays, is dated and laughable. But it was revolutionary for it's time and it pretty much created the quintessential example of what a Shonen anime should be. Dimwitted main character that is pure of heart? Check. Over exaggerated fight scenes and powers? Check. Low amount of female presence? Check. Awesome fucking show? Check.



So! Now after twenty years of the show's first airing, we're given a live-action, American film. And we all know what to expect. Firstly, let's just establish how the characters of the movie deviated from the original source material.

1. Goku - an American teen that is attending school and finds it hard to talk to girls that he fantasizes eating strawberries in an open field (actually fucking happened). Also, apparently an avid Beatles fan.
2. Bulma- also an American. That's basically all that's wrong here, she's done pretty well actually.
3. Roshi - Not bald.
4. Oozaru - um...looked right, just not to scale.

Now I realize this is just nitpicking, but as an avid fan, I think I should nitpick for all those other avid fans out there. The first thing I was asked by my friends who are just as diehard fans as I am was "so how different (shitty) was it?" To which I, to my surprise, respond: "It wasn't THAT bad."

Look, we all know the movie wasn't going to be as true to the series as we all want it to be because, let's be honest, you couldn't make a 2 hour movie out of it and have it be enjoyable. So the creators instead made a hour and half film that has spliced together different already done films and created some strange DB offspring that, if you took away the DB elements, could have been any other movie.

The formula is basically this:

Karate Kid + Transformers + Harry Potteresque Effects - Magic, Robots and the Crane Technique X the Dragon Ball Appendix = DB Evolution.

Which, if you look at the movies in the ingredients, doesn't seem that bad. And it isn't...THAT bad. It's bad. It's definitely bad. But it's not unenjoyable. In fact, it was pretty sweet to see a Spikey haired, orange and blue clad, Justin Chatwin powering up and screaming "kamehameha!!!" at the end of the film. So, for what it is, it does well. Does it stick to the series? No. Does it make up for that? Sorta.



If you're not that sensitive to the DBZ universe being raped and Americanized to please audiences, then you'll walk out of the film at least mildly amused. And if that's not enough, the girl that plays Chi Chi is fucking hot.



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14 comments | showing # 1 to 14
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Char Aznable's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/13/2009 12:47
Char Aznable
I completely forgot that this came out this past weekend, and was expecting more people complaining before its release. At least with a Uwe Boll movie there are people screaming about it for two months before it comes out.

This movie didn't get any positive attention, nor did it get the negative hype that could also drum up interest in buying tickets. Hmm...
F Whipple's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/13/2009 12:49
F Whipple
It was horrible. I didn't care that it strayed from the source as I was hoping for it to be "so bad it's good" a la the first street fighter movie. For the first half it actually was and then it turned into utter crap. The final "fight" scene was laughable at best.
gregatrons's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/13/2009 13:43
gregatrons
it wasn't...THAT...bad. OK, yeah it was. But give it sometime and it'll turn into a cult classic crap movie. and that is when it'll be outstanding.
etirflita's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/13/2009 13:56
etirflita
It was made of win. That bully attacked his own car with a sword! Did everyone else not see that?

oh, and the whole Nimbus thing. .. .
ok, so it was bad.
de BLOO's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/13/2009 14:01
de BLOO
I saw it with some dtoiders online.... the comments we were making were pure gold. It made the movie watchable during the entire thing.
Knivy's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/13/2009 14:19
Knivy
When I've been asked I've been explaining it like this.

Imagine Dragonball was a 100% American cartoon, just somewhat influenced by anime (like some recent cartoon series), think then about the things that would be different, then imagine they made a movie out of that, that movie would be Dragonball Evolution.
Sirapak's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/13/2009 15:44
Sirapak
TERRIBLE, DESERVES AN F ON YAHOO MOVIES BUT THEY GET PAID TO KEEP IT A C RATING DAMN YOU YAHOO! YOU ARE FOR SALE HUH?
SakuChan's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/13/2009 15:48
SakuChan
I didn't think it was that bad. Then again, I'm not a nit picky critic who rips shit to shreds just cause it doesn't stay true to the fucking story. It could have been a lot worse and it wasn't. I love Dragon Ball. I've loved it since I was really small and I didn't think the movie was that bad. Don't expect everyone to think the same way because people are never fucking satisfied with anything.
Justin Villasenor's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/13/2009 16:36
Justin Villasenor
I thought it was pretty bad.

Not as bad as Twilight, though.
Tony Ponce's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/13/2009 17:51
Tony Ponce
I dunno how I would compare it to the early '90s Chinese film adaptation? Which is campier? That movie was awesome because Master Roshi was the biggest pimp evar.
Janledroxa's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/14/2009 11:42
Janledroxa
live action KAMEHAMEHA sux, that wasnt the concentrated energy of both ur body and nature, that was a blue fart!!!... TO THE FACE! i guess my point is that i didnt enjoy it.
Joanna Mueller's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/14/2009 11:54
Joanna Mueller
@ Megastryke

Someday I'll make it past the first 10 minutes of that movie. Someday.
gregatrons's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/14/2009 13:30
gregatrons
@ Megastryke

if there was ever a perfect rendition of roshi to live action, you found it sir.
E.C.Gach's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/17/2009 08:40
E.C.Gach
Saw it last night. I definitely haven't laughed as hard as I did in the dragon summoning scene in a while. And the movie isn't sort of bad, it's sooooo bad you wonder why anyone at all agreed to be a part of it, but fortunately they did so I could laugh at them all.

"I don't know what happen to my parents, my grandpa said he'd explain everything to me when I was eighteen....I'm eighteen now" best line of the movie.
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