I am a gamer.

I've traversed the lengths and breadth of countless worlds and saved those worlds dozens of times from nameless, faceless, formless evils.

I have become death to anonymous cronies and have brought life to barren plains.

I have become a god among men and slaughtered those that have stood before my might!

But I will be damned to the darkest pits of hell if I can beat my wife at Wii Bowling.

My wife is what you might call a casual gamer. She plays bass on medium difficulty on Rock Band, takes Uno on Xbox Live out for the occasional spin, and sometimes boots up Tetris on my phone when she thinks I'm not looking. However, the competitive landscape of my entire home changed when I bought a Wii.

The first thing we booted up upon getting the Wii hooked up was Wii Sports. I played around a bit before she got home, and we took some of the multiplayer out for a spin. For awhile there, we had no idea what we were doing. Why couldn't we consistently hit home runs? Why did our putts go off to the right? And why the hell was that target in the tennis practice mode so hard to $@%^^$# hit?

When we booted up bowling, she didn't even want to play. She hates bowling in real life (knee injury) and has always been embarrassed of her skills at the lanes. I have not been bowling with her since high school and though I enjoy the sport, I thought this piece of software would go largely unplayed in our house.

As it turns out, she's an amazing Wii bowler. I thought her first victory was a fluke, but when she reached pro months before me, I finally started catching on that maybe something was different about this game.

She would consistently beat me 9 times out of 10. She was better at the training games, she could beat all of our friends, hell, she even knocked down all of that 91 pin thing at the end without cheating! I've never been so humiliated and so proud at the same time. She may not be able to top me at Brawl or beat Twilight Princess, but dammit the girl can bowl.