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Back in the great days of my youth almost 19 years ago, when the NES was king and I was a portly little quiet kid. A kid who escaped everyday to the Mushroom Kingdom and Dracula's Castle to avoid my boring existence as a grade school child. I had very few friends and a non-existent home life so video games became a coping mechanism to help my personal development and became my best friend.
The NES in today's world is considered archaic, dilapidated, old, and maybe even silly; to me, it was the best game console ever made (until the SNES that is). Many of the games that were there to be enjoyed were ones you had to beat within the time-span from when the power button was pressed to the on position to the time when you either:
A) Accidentally Hit the Reset Button
B) Had a Power Outage (prevalent in the south)
C) The Connection Between Cartridge and NES Failed
D) You Hit The Power Button
If you didn't beat the game in that span of time, you had to start over from the beginning, usually World/Level 1-1.
There were some games that did come with more advance features such as Battery Backup (which is now starting to fail in some of my older games ;__:) or Password Features that were great as long as you write it down exactly as it appeared, if not, back to World 1-1 Noob! There was however a way around this problem, the NES didn't generate heat much at all, the power supply did, so many of us started to leave the NES on all night long while we slept.
I can remember going home from school on Friday night playing all day until I couldn't possibly go any further, shutting off the TV, the lights and everything else only to have the square cyclopic red eyeball of the NES stare at me all night like HAL 9000 in 2001: A Space Odyssey threatening to kill me while I slept. Today's list deals with those few games that forced me to do so on many occasions, I'll see you at the end.
Goonies II While the original Goonies game was never released here in America, its sequel did manage to see the light of day. The story had you playing as Mikey trying to rescue the other Goonies as well as a mermaid from the clutches of the evil Fratellis who have escaped from prison once again.
This game was long, and in most respects a pain in the ass to play when it went to its faux-3D rooms that you had to explore. Other than those, it was a really really fun game to play. If it wasn't for the repeating rendition of Cyndi Lauper's song from the movie, it would be a great game. The game does have a password feature but since it was a bit too complicated like most Konami games, if you messed up one letter or one character...it's back to the beginning of the game.
Clash At Demonhead One of the more relatively unknown games I own on my NES, Clash At Demonhead was a real acquired taste. The game seemed majorly flawed by its graphics and stunted gameplay, but the story is where the game shined. If you've never had a chance to play this game, give it a little time and it will come to grow on you and become one of the best platforming adventure games you've ever played. Well, at least that's my opinion.
This was yet another game that had no way of saving your game unless you really enjoyed entering a password that could have very easily been transcribed wrong. The risk was always just a bit too high for me to quit the game with a password. I even had a chalkboard in my room (whiteboards didn't exist back then) that I would use to keep track of all of my game secrets and passwords.
Faxanadu Faxanadu was perhaps one of the first action RPGs that I played while growing up. Sure, I had spent a whole bunch of time playing Castlevania 2: Simon's Quest, but this game provided more for me. The music and graphics used in the game were substantial for the time the game was released. This was perhaps one of the first games that I ever played that used music as more than just background filler.
The worst part about playing any RPG on the old NES wasn't so much that it was hard, but the fact that so many of them used passwords instead of batteries to save your progress. Faxanadu was brutal because it used both uppercase and lowercase letters, numbers, AND punctuation marks in its passwords. I guess playing games like this set me up for the job I do today...making passwords for simpletons.
Metal Gear Oh man the first Metal Gear was a nerdy kids wet dream, it had it all: simulated stealth, cigarettes, c-rations, 15 different weapons and a cardboard box you could sneak around in. The only problem, is that I didn't quite know all that was going on thanks to the lack of good localization (trust me the MSX version was much better). Kojima had a great game even for the 80s standards of Nintendo games, it was released under the Ultra label to get past Nintendo's embargo on game companies making too many games per year. As has been one of my favorite games all throughout my childhood.
To get an example of how retarded the game's save feature was, here ya go. There was NO battery at all and when you called on the radio to get your password you got a string of 25 numbers that you would have to write down. 25 is a lot of stuff to write down and to input into ANY game. Here's the password that I actually used to have memorized so I could start the game with all the equipment if you don't believe how much work old games used to be: 5XZ1C GZZZG UOOOU UYRZZ NTOZ3. Tell me that's not a tad overkill...
Ghosts & Goblins This game gets one paragraph, and only one because it fucking sucks how this game played me as a kid. I get to the last level and up the the boss only to be dragged ALL THE WAY back to the beginning of the game. At that point I turned the game off and went to bed angry. I got up and beat the game the next morning only to take it back to game store to demand a full return of my money. There, I said it, fuck this game.
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles A game that I have only beaten once, ever, in the whole time that I have owned the cartridge. I even got punished because I was so late coming home that night because I was at the last level facing off against Shredder. In case you didn't know, TMNT also has a rather negative stigma as a really tough game that is unforgiving. Whether your hangups be on the level with the electric seaweed and the underwater bombs, or the multiple times that you have to witness screen flicker from too many sprites on the screen at one time, this game could fuck you up quickly.
Do I even need to remind the people here that Raphael was a pretty worthless character because his sais had an attack range of maybe 3 inches? Its not so much that this game didn't have a password or save feature, but it was always tough for me to reach for the power button when I spent 3 hours getting to the 4th stage. At times I miss how tough games were, but then again I remember how mad some always made me and how often I would take all my aggression out on my poor defenseless controllers.
Super Maro Bros. 3 Ok, ok, I'm sure there are some of you calling bullshit on this one being here on the list, but lets face the facts here. Mario 3 is a simple game if you cheat and use the warp whistles, but what about the people like me who wanted to play the ENTIRE game themselves? I can recall with great joy the moment I made it above the clouds in World 5 and the triumph I felt after beating World 7 all by myself. If anyone was going to be tapping that sweet princess peach it was going to be me!
Man, is it just me, but does it not take forever to beat every single stage in SMB3? What's worse is the fact that Nintendo in their infinite short sightedness decided that this game didn't need any kind of save feature! Thankfully when I bought Super Mario All-Stars, it remedied the problem and had a save feature for EACH Mario game on the cart.
Little Nemo: The Dream Master It's no surprise that most of the games that I've put on my top 10 are some of the most despicable examples of hard games, and Little Nemo was no slouch in that department either. The game seems somewhat of a kids game until you get to the train on the Topsy Turvy level and spend the next 2 hours trying to figure out the whole pattern to it all to get to the next stage.
I loved this game for the mere fact that you bribe the animals you come across to let you "borrow" them by throwing candy at them. Bee Mario? Sorry it was done back before the Wii ever thought of it when Nemo could become a bee himself. Oh man, there is just something about Capcom games from back in the late 80s that will always warm my heart to think about them.
Bionic Commando I creamed myself when I played the remake of this game on XBLA in glorious HD and with 3D graphics. It is a retro-gamer's dream to have a game like Bionic Commando be remade. This is one of the most classic examples of a quality game, it had great graphics, sound, music, animation, and a somewhat plausible story featuring everyone's favorite punching bag: Hitler!
There was no chance of me ever turning off my console once I started playing Bionic Commando when I was young. After spawn camping one spot in the first area to build up my life points (it took collecting 300 bullets randomly dropped by baddies), and collecting all of my equipment to cross the big span between the first areas to the final areas...I became a zombie. I would purposely leave my NES on just to prove to some of my friends that I had in fact beat the game. You see, back then it was easy to say that you beat a game, it was another point entirely to prove that you did.
Battletoads Ah, what can I say about one of the best games to ever grace the good ol' NES? It was one of Rare's first in a long line of awesomesauce that the company became known for so many years later. But there is a catch with Battletoads, this game was really fucking hard, not just a little hard, really really fucking hard. The game's length is pretty extensive too, I have yet to see a game like this where there are so many varied elements of gameplay. If there was one thing I could leave behind with Battletoads, it would have to be the speeder bike level.
The game had NO password settings, NO battery backup, and was quite possibly one of the meanest games to ever allow multiplayer. There was friendly fire in this game in a time where friendly fire wasn't even defined outside the military. That never stopped my and my friends from just beating the shit out of each other though. I can remember playing just that first level almost like it were my very own version of Street Fighter II. With a game as brutal as this though, who could blame me?
The Simpsons: Bart vs The Space Mutants If there's anything I hate more than poorly designed games, its poorly designed games that have no apparent way of beating them. That's were this awesome example of licensed gaming comes into play. The game looked great, but was nigh impossible to win at it. I can even think of the area in the game that always hung me up. It was right where you have to run up the dinosaur skeleton and make this unbelievable leap of faith. The game was very sparing with giving you extra lives but you go through them at an insane rate.
To this day, I've never beat this game but I can recall having to leave my NES on overnight only to lose every SINGLE extra life that I had within 5 minutes, though no matter how mad I would get at this game, I'd still try to track down a copy.
Well, this concludes yet another Weird Kid’s Top 10 list. I hope you all enjoyed reading it. I know for certain that there are many of you out there that will disagree with some of my choices for this list, but keep in mind that this is in no way a definitive listing nor is it meant to be taken seriously. Its all for fun, just enjoy reading and take something away with you or leave a comment if you so wish.
If you have a particular Top 10 that you’d like to see let me know! I’d be happy to oblige. Thank you again for reading. See you again next time! read more
The arcade, to my generation its where magic happened one quarter at a time, and games looked so much better than anything you could play on a console at home. The big names were always represented in these beaming halls of standup gaming fury, Sega, Capcom, Konami, and one of my favorites SNK.
You would always catch me over at the SNK cabinets, easily identifiable as the ones with red and white stripes and always with the same 4 button layout. You'd even be lucky at time to find a cabinet that has more than one of your favorite games. Keep in mind though that they didn't specifically make games JUST for the Neo Geo cabinets in the arcade and their proprietary system, they managed to give some serious love to the Nintendo back in the day. Honestly, there isn't a game maker that I think is more plugged in to what their fans want and appreciate. Tonight’s list is: Excremento's top 10 SNK games of all time, enjoy!
NAM-1975
If you've ever played a game like Cabal or the Western-themed Blood Brothers, then NAM-1975 is right up your alley. The game plays almost identical to the other 3rd person action shooters that were out at the time. The game takes place in...you guessed it VietNAM in the year 1975 (which for you younglings out there is when the conflict for America drew to a close), and involves you + a gun + grenades versus them dirty North Vietnamese. It is totally derivative gameplay, but still remains one of my favorite arcade shooters.
Top Hunter: Roddy & Cathy
Top Hunter is a great side scrolling 2D beat-em up that shares its soul with games like Battletoads, Super Mario Bros., and Street Fighter. I know it sounds like a strange combination, but besides regular attacks you can jump on your foes, throw items at them, throw hadokens, and even grapple with the baddies.
This game is a piece of 2D art, and is very gorgeous. Each stage features amazing detail and 2 layer backgrounds that give you a faux sense of 3D. Top Hunter is great, but is relatively unknown to the non-Neo Geo crowd. It's worth your time if you can 'not' get a copy for yourself to check out, I wouldn't suggest actually buying this game unless you're a serious collector like Hitogoroshi.
Metal Slug 3
The Metal Slug series did for shoot-em up games what Ronald McDonald did for burgers...it made them fun and addicting at the same time. Action is much like the Contra series except, you know, better. The graphics are always eye-meltingly good, and the individual shrieks you hear from each character meeting their demise combined with the report made from each weapon you use go to create an atmosphere that is so reminiscent of arcade gaming when I was younger.
The best think that you can look forward to in any Metal Slug is that there is almost guaranteed to be new items, vehicles, and enemies to shoot at. The ONLY reason that MS3 makes this list and not the others is the vomiting zombie that you can become...seriously you have no excuse, go and get this game either on the Wii, XBLA, or on a Neo Geo console, now.
Last Blade 2
The greatest historically weapon based fighter you've never played is how I would sum up the gameplay experience of playing The Last Blade series. Just like any Neo Geo based fighting game, the visuals are damn near perfect and are some of the best examples of sprite animation ever seen. The Last Blade series was created by the same genius behind Guilty Gear, Mr. Daisuke Ishiwatari.
If you were to look closely at the combat system behind Guilty Gear, you can almost see a few parallels. The most engaging aspect of gameplay is the introduction of a parry button that will leave your opponent up to an attack if you time it juuuust right. The music and sound effects used in the game are very reminiscent of the type that would hear during an epic samurai movie that were all based during the Tokugawa era in which the game is set.
King of Fighters 98
I bought this game for my Dreamcast way back when the Dreamcast was still fairly new, and it prompted me to go out and actually buy a Neo Geo Pocket Color with The King of Fighters R2 so I could link it up with my Dreamcast. This was the one game in the KoF series that cemented me as a lifelong SNK fan.
Whether it be the inclusion of almost every single team member from all of the years past, or the new challengers that made it into the mix. I believe that this was the first KoF that detached itself from the rest of the SNK fighting game flock and stood out on its own. The gameplay was balanced more than any of its predecessors, the roster was huge, the music was memorable, and the backgrounds were detailed. I really really really liked playing this game on my Dreamcast and still remains to this day one of my top 3 for the system.
Ikari Warriors
Ikari Warriors (Ikari is moonspeak for 'anger') busted in on the shmup scene back in the mid-eighties and featured a few never-before-used gameplay elements that have survived the test of time and are still used in many games to this day. The 8 direction joystick used in the arcade coupled with the 8 position rotary switch underneath said joystick is what I think became the precursor for the standard we enjoy in FPS games. Metal Slug wouldn't be Metal Slug if there was no tank to jump in. Hell, even co-op gameplay was scarce on arcade cabinets until Ikari Warriors proved that nearly every game deserved it.
Let's not forget that SNK rarely forgets its roots. The protagonists in Ikari Warriors would eventually end their hiatus and appear in one of SNK's most popular series The King of Fighters, representing Team Brazil. SNK even gave Ralf and Clark a chance to rejoin their original genre and continue their shmup legacy in Metal Slug 6.
Sengoku 2
I bet a lot of you awesome Dtoid peeps have never played the Sengoku games. Well a good place to start would be with the second game in the series. Sengoku 2 took what was established in the first game, and compounded the awesome until the graphics were on par with every game seen on the Neo Geo in the mid-90s and the Music/SFX were clear and distinct.
The game's story is more epic than any of the other iterations of the game and there is an added bonus of being able to power up your weapons and swap the game's characters. Though the game is a run-of-the-mill side scrolling beat-em up, it shines much brighter than any Final Fight game, especially since you could slice and dice your opponents into oblivion, not to mention all the arterial spraying.
Samurai Shodown 2
Don't get me wrong, this is in no way a better game than most of the other fighting games that I have put on this list except for the fact that I have so much love for this one in particular. Samurai Shodown was cool as hell when I first got my hands on the series, but didn't get much love out of me until I started playing this game almost everyday when I was hanging out at my local comics shop.
The epic battles between me and my friend, each of us proficient with every character were the matches of legend. I loved every single round that was spent in that store, especially cause my teenage brain kept making me use Cham-Cham over and over again (not only cause she was the most distinct character, but she also had a monkey on her side). It may not be the best SS game, but damnit it's always going to be my favorite.
Garou: Mark of the Wolves
The culmination of every 2D fighting game that SNK has ever made came out in 1999 and featured animations that were as fluid, if not better than that Street Fighter III could ever be. That is a complete fanboy statement, but damnit SNK was so ahead of the game when it came to 2D innovation. There really are only 2 camps when it comes to fighters: you're either a SNK fan, or a Capcom fan. Don't get me wrong, I love Capcom something fierce, but SNK trumps them with play mechanics, well balanced characters that have full histories, and the pure beauty of the sprites they use.
The events of MotW take place 10 years after Geese Howard offed himself in Real Bout, and features offspring and disciples of many of SNK's favorite characters: Rock Howard - Geese's Son, Kim Dong Hwan & Kim Jae Hoon - Kim Kaph Wan's Sons, Kushnood Butt - Ryo Sakazaki's Student. The only thing that does hold the game back is it's suprisingly small cast of characters.
When I first started playing this game in the arcade, there was just too much going on, it's amazing to experience. The untrained would think that it is simply just another fighter, but the lovers of the game have come to realize that the game is deeper than most Street Fighter games, and is even argued to be better than the Guilty Gear series. Personally, I'd rather spend an afternoon playing this than any new game that Capcom may throw my way.
Crystalis
I have no doubts that Crystalis influenced some of my favorite games and is why that the action RPG genre is where it is today. Hands down, Crystalis is quite possibly one of the finest RPGs you could ever hope to play on the NES. Combining the RPG aspects of the Final Fantasy series and mixing it with the action aspects of The Legend of Zelda and Star Tropics was a brilliant move by SNK. That's right, the company known for some of the best series in fighting game history was also the creator of one of my favorite RPGs ever.
The story for the game takes place 100 years after a global nuclear war (how many NES games used nuclear holocaust as a plot device, hmmmm?), when your character awakens from a cryogenic sleep chamber to bring order to the world and prevent the rise of the evil Draygonian Empire to ultimate power.
Sounds simple enough right? Well the developers saw fit to make the game pristine in its execution. For those of you that never got a chance with this game imagine the gameplay from TLOZ: A Link to the Past and the abilities from TLOZ: Link's Awakening being available to you back in 1990. I mean, they even saw fit to have the character move in 8 directions, sounds weird I know, but for most of the RPGs on the NES, you could only move in 4 directions, hence why this game is my Number 1 pick for any SNK game.
AMAZING SHOCKING TIE!!!
It's simply amazing...I've never had a tie for the Number 0 spot of my top tens, ever.
Lee Trevino's Fighting Golf
There has never been a golf game that I haven't loved and or played. I'm serious, I fucking love golf games. It all started back in the PC days of yore when I got hooked on Links and has continued on to the Hot Shots Golf series that I enjoy playing on my PS2 and PS3. Lee Trevino's Fighting Golf was one of the rare sports games that I loved on my NES, and until I starting writing this article, I had no clue that SNK was behind its creation. What's even better is that they parodied the game on the Simpsons, on the same episode that they had Bonestorm in, except they named it "Lee Carvallo's Putting Challenge". Classic Simpsons are so good.
Doki Doki Majo Shinpan
This game, never released here in the U.S. is the ultimate pedo-game, all because you have to use the stylus of your DS to 'touch' tween witches in an attempt to find their "witch mark" which ultimately exposes them as what they truly are. If that's not enough to garner a spot as a zero, the game sold even better than The Legend of Zelda: Phantom Hourglass in Japan and is even getting a sequel.
I guess it just goes to show you that the difference in gamers from Japan and gamers all throughout the world is that we don't secretly wish to touch little girls like the Japanese are so wont to do. I can only imagine the flooding amount of H-Games that are going to be spawned from the success of this game. The best thing that I saw is the fact that a UK magazine called "NGamer" awarded it 'The Superman 64 Award For Worst Game" in 2007 because they gave it 'NOs' in every category instead of a score.
Well, this concludes yet another Weird Kid's Top 10 list. I hope you all enjoyed reading it. I know for certain that there are many of you out there that will disagree with some of my choices for this list, but keep in mind that this is in no way a definitive listing nor is it meant to be taken seriously. Its all for fun, just enjoy reading and take something away with you or leave a comment if you so wish.
As always, please let me know if you have a particular Top 10 that you'd like to see, and I'd be happy to oblige. For all of my faithful fans that do submit ideas, I promise I'll eventually get around to yours. Thank you again for reading. See you next time.
Moving sucks...I hate it. Hopefully this will be the LAST time I will ever have to move. It is one of the most futile and frustrating activities that I've ever had to do. You pack up all your stuff, move its physical location, unpack, and hope you didn't forget anything.
Unfortunately for me, these last 3 years at my apartment have made it so that I have yet to be completely unpacked from my last move from my parent's basement. If I include this most recent move coming up, I will have moved 13 times in my life (I can thank Uncle Sam for 9 of them), which automatically qualifies me as a 'moving' ninja. I'm good at what I do, I just don't enjoy it.
Luckily, Mrs. Excremento and I have finally closed on our house and are now in the process of uprooting and moving to the fortress of solitude where we can raise our brood. This means that I will finally get a chance to have my media room decked out the way it should be. In the process of this move, after going through boxes upon boxes of games that haven't seen the light of day in years, I found some that I forgot that I even owned until yesterday when I found them all over again. Today’s list is The Weird Kid's Top 10 Games I Forgot I Owned Until I Found Them While Packing Up My Apartment To Move To My New House. Enjoy!
N2O: Nitrous Oxide - PlayStation
I used to have the biggest boner for any album that The Crystal Method made. Their first album Vegas is still one of the best examples of good ol' American made Techno. When I found out they did the soundtrack for a game, I was there, with cash in hand.
For those of you that might have never played N2O it's like this other game that was popular a long time ago (when I was a kid), Tempest. The similarities being that you pilot a ship that is tethered to a wall of a tunnel that is full of all sorts of baddies that you have to try to clear. The great thing about this game was its graphics. The tunnels you are in change shape, undulate, and change color sometimes in order to rape your eyes and give you motion sickness. This game's experience was made so much better by having its soundtrack be nothing but TCM all the way through.
Hell, in a time before custom game soundtracks, stuff like this was important and could be seen as selling points for games. I almost bought a Duke Nukem game just because the opening song was by Stabbing Westward. I can even remember popping various PlayStation games into my Discman to see if the game's music would show up.
Ghost in the Shell - PlayStation
Being a fan of many anime and not too much manga, you'd have to have been living under a rock in the nerd world to never have seen Ghost in the Shell at least once back in the late 90s. The movie was great, but for most of us silly Americans, we had no idea who the characters were. Not until the GitS: Stand Alone Complex series did we get a chance to find out the back-story on most of the series' beloved characters.
Too bad that the game came out before the TV series...
Don't get me wrong, the game is pretty fucking awesome by PS1 standards. The bad part is that every level has you playing as a no-name troop known as "The Rookie" inside a Fuchikoma tank as you crawl along walls, scaling buildings, hanging upside down, jumping chasms, and essentially shooting anything that isn't a friend. The best part of the game is the soundtrack and cut scenes (actually made by Production I.G.), the soundtrack was good enough to warrant its own soundtrack cd and the voice acting in the game was done by the actual voice cast from the TV show and movies.
Code Name: Viper - NES
Can someone say complete rip-off of Rolling Thunder? I can, but you know what, I don't care. This game was a fun little romp through 8 stages of similar looking enemies that are palette swapped. There's platforming, getting behind cover, shooting, and more awesome NES speak from the hostages you rescue. Instead of "Thank You!" it sounds like "Meeekh Maw".
If you've never played this game before, and you're a fan of Rolling Thunder type games, give this a shot. It's no Shinobi, but is pretty well done for an early Capcom game on the good old NES.
Shatterhand - NES
One of the greatest unsung heroes here in America for game development would have to be Natsume. The company never really made it huge here but they kept on releasing awesome action game after awesome action game and Shatterhand is one of the greatest.
There's a special place in my heart for all the awesome action games on the NES, whether it be Ninja Gaiden, Vice: Project Doom, or even G.I. Joe, I think it was the console's defining genre. Shatterhand is one of the few games that once imported into the country was made better by adding effects and better graphics over the Japanese version.
The game's mechanic is your typical action platformer reminiscent of a run-and-gun game except you yourself have no gun, just your fists. Well that's true until you collect enough 'Alpha' and 'Beta' icons to build a little robot buddy to help you out. This game is one of the rare gems that came out near the end of the NES's lifecycle, at that time when the games on the console were really really well done. If you're a fan of the genre and you like having fun, check your apartment out when cleaning up, you too might have a copy you forgot about.
Side Arms Hyper Dyne- Turbografx 16
Another game that incorporated the Alpha and Beta theme was Side Arms Hyper Dyne that was originally an arcade game that got ported to just about every system imaginable for its time. Taking cues from other shmup games like Gradius, you had a multitude of powerups and speed-ups for your character that you use to battle all sorts of various no name enemies.
What was great about this game and why I'm glad I found it was that it is a damn near arcade perfect version of the game. Not as cool as my copy of Blazing Lazers but still a pretty damn cool game nonetheless. Also, if you find the hidden powerups in the stages and you are playing 2 player, you join together like F-ing Voltron to decimate your foes...man I loved this game!
Grandia - PlayStation
Grandia, you either loved it or hated it. I'm one of the few that adored this game. The story was strangely attractive, considering it was like most JRPGs and dealing with the coming-of-age of the characters involved. The main draws for me with this game, like all of my games is the great soundtrack, and innovative battle system that mixed active-time and real-time elements.
I remember from the game, the quest to reach the wall that divides the 'end of the world' was pretty epic, and the cool way that the game made you feel sympathy with the characters by tackling elements that all gamers tend to share. Most of us game players share the same traits, we're curious, energetic, loyal, adventuresome, and most importantly we enjoy other people's company and like to have fun. That's what this game is, one of the best examples of JRPG fun. My only complaint...slowdown, there's massive slowdown as the screen fills up with sprites.
Excitebike - NES
Its fuckin' Excitebike, 'nuff said. I just cant believe I forgot I owned this one!
Jet Grind Radio - Dreamcast
Jet Grind Radio (aka Jet Set Radio), I thought I lent you out to my friend back in the day! I am so happy I didn't cause he's not my friend anymore! I thought this game was lost forever due to the strange circumstance that is known as growing up. I got this game mainly because it had graffiti art as the main gameplay mechanic. Little did I know that electro-magnetic inline skates and gang warfare would be the other 2 big things.
Probably one of the first cel-shaded games ever to be made, JGR holds a special place in my heart as one of my favorite games with a wild and eclectic soundtrack that suits my personality to a "T". Holy crap if you seriously have never had some time with the Jet ___ Radio series, go out to Gamestop and spend 4 bucks on an Xbox version of the game. I'm just glad that I found my copy, now I don't have to source a new one from ebay!!!
Dungeons & Dragons Collection - Saturn
Man I got so lucky in finding this game. I had it stuffed in my PC game box of games because it doesn’t even resemble other games that I have on my Saturn. Not only is the game really 2 games smooshed into one box. It's two arcade perfect versions of the games, and it's friggin D&D!
Only one problem, I speak and read only enough moonspeak to get by, not quite enough to get the whole story of what’s going on in the game, or what somebody just said to me. It's ok, this beat 'em up is one of my favorites that never gets old, no matter how many times I play it. I especially love being the cleric and killing undead enemies with my magic rings. Have fun with the dragon at the end of the first game though. Oh, and boobies in the second game!!!! Woo hoo!
[ Legend of Mana - PlayStation
I don't know how I forgot I had this game. Honestly, with the amount of time I spent playing this game would have made it an easy thing to remember...alas, it was forgotten. This is probably my second favorite version of the Mana series, with Secret of Mana claiming the number one spot in my heart.
The graphics in this game are spectacular, all of the hand drawn and painted backgrounds, all of the 2D character sprites were just unbelievable. The music is probably one of the most important aspects of the game for me. The soundtrack was composed by Yoko Shimamura, the same genius behind the soundtracks for Kingdom Hearts I & II, Parasite Eve, Super Smash Bros. Brawl, Tobal No. 1, and even Street Fighter 2; that makes her alright in my book.
Now many people think that this game isn't worth the Mana moniker (I'm looking at you BigPopaGamer!!!), I happen to disagree. Its true that there isn't much story in the game (probably why I forgot the game) but there is sooooooo much content there to keep a guy like me happy for weeks. I really want to throw this game into my PS3 just to see the opening video right now...too bad for me, I'm at work.
Pro-Wrestling - NES
The beginning of the button-mashing console fighting game was in an area of my apartment that hadn't seen daylight in a long time. I picked up the cartridge, and immediately ran into the other room to pop it into the good ol' NES. I was immediately frustrated by the control scheme and the unrelenting computer opponents, but had to give a good laugh when the match was me 'Starman' vs. 'The Amazon'.
This game had it all, cameramen, referees that dropped to the mat when you go down for the count, and even better is the simulated 3 count that the NES's sad little sound chip tries to emulate. I had a good time with the game, but seriously it got old FAST. Its sad though I can remember a time before home console fighting games where all we had to keep us entertained on weekends when we'd have friends over were games like this one.
Well, this concludes yet another Weird Kid's Top 10 list. I hope you all enjoyed reading it. I'm just glad that most of my most precious games that I thought I lost or forgot about are still in my collection. Remember my top 10s are meant to be entertaining and not meant to be taken seriously. Its all for fun, just enjoy reading and take something away with you or leave a comment if you so wish.
As always, please let me know if you have a particular Top 10 that you'd like to see, and I'd be happy to oblige. For all of my faithful fans that do submit ideas, I promise I'll eventually get around to yours. Thank you again for reading. See you next time. read more
I'm always striving to create new content that might be interesting to the Destructoid crowd. In doing so, I've always had issue with writing up stories about the news or just rehashing something somebody else has written about already.
Today, I hope to introduce to my faithful audience, a new feature that I think is pretty unique and reader friendly. Let's not forget that it could possibly open me up to harassment and comments, after all that's one thing I really think keeps Dtoid so fresh...user content.
I introduce to you: The Search for Booty Episode I, The Devil May Arc the Gungrave
I went out on Saturday to do my normal rounds of relative visiting/shop visiting with my lovely wife, when I decided to go into Gamestop while the wife was over at Robert's Arts & Crafts. This not being my first trip to the GS, I knew precisely where the bargain bin was located, and I only planned on spending about $20. It was there that I started my search in the 'A's and came across a title that I had no recollection of...Arc the Lad: Twilight of the Spirits.
I never played any of the original AtL games, but really wanted to get the collection that came out for the PlayStation, so without a moment’s hesitation I picked up the game for a paltry $3.99. I played this game for about 30 minutes last night and I have to say that so far, I am really impressed. The creators of the game have done a really good job of making you care about the characters simply by making them seem alive. This is quite the feat for a RPG that came out in 2003.
The story is your typical son of so-n-so who becomes the 'chosen one' meant to save the world, fairly typical but at least the voice acting is pretty well done. The gameplay is almost traditional RPG except for the battle system, which is turn based but has a strategy twist added to it. Think Front Mission or Final Fantasy Tactics, just not on a grid system. Finally, the graphics are very pretty and the animations are nice and fluid. What really got me is that the programmers took the time to animate the 3D trees in the background to make the world seem more alive, you could almost feel the breeze on your skin.
Next down the line while I was doing my searches was Devil May Cry 2, a game that I had heard was shit, but I needed it for the collection's sake. I loved the first one, hated number three 'cause it was so hard, and enjoyed number four a lot, so I thought "hey, what the hell, its only $6.99, why not?" I'm glad to say that the game isn't horrible like everyone thinks it is. It's just not good. I didn't like the combat in this one compared to the first game, and the enemies weren't as cool either. My major gripe with this game is that they changed the character model of Dante slightly which made him look more like a sad, beefy-clown than a demon hunter. Too bad, I’m sad to say that this one will just be for my collection only.
Finally, rounding out my quest for booty was a game that I always wanted to try but couldn't force myself to pick up thanks to the skewed reviews I was reading about it, Gungrave. You know what I found out? This game is pretty damn fun! Maybe it’s the fact that it feels like an old school arcade shooter because you only really need to worry about hitting one button over and over again, or that the graphics are really well done for an anime based game. The voice acting is top notch and left in Japanese like all anime should be, and the story is just your standard one guy against a criminal organization with guns that never need to be reloaded. Gungrave is quite possibly one of the best shmup type games that I've played in years. The best part is that it only cost me a whole whopping $7.99.
I rate my purchases as follows:
Gungrave -- gets a 7 for its mindless killing and fun factor, exactly the kind of game that I was looking for this weekend.
Ark the Lad -- another 7 for its awesome soundtracks and almost believable characters with good voice acting.
Devil May Cry 2 -- hits the bottom with a 4 due to its uninspired sequel-ness, and derivative gameplay that just left me wanting.
Probably the best part of hitting all of my local Gamestop locations is that I'm starting to get noticed as 'that guy', you know the guy who buys anything and has very vocal opinions. At the register this time, I talked with the manager and a really bitchy employee about collections and why I keep on collecting. The discussion quickly dissolved into how sad I am that I still have all my anime on VHS instead of DVD and what a pain in the ass it is when new formats come out. Oh well, c'est la vie...I've been around since LPs and Cassettes and I'm sure that I will be around for other numerous generational changes. Luckily they all have a good home with me, where I will take good care of them all, to the end of my days. Thanks for reading!
There are plenty of others here on D-Toid that do the same. I thought to myself "Wouldn't it be nice to share some sophisticated drink recipes with fellow adults?" That's where this posting comes from, the love I have for all drinks. So if you too are 21 years old or above, stay a spell, crack open a 'cold one' and join me as I share tonight's recipe.
Bloodylip's I Have A Hard-Dreamsicle
It's been a real long time since I've posted up any kind of blog here on Destructoid, but I thought I'd give it another try. One of bestest friends in the IRC chat room (yes, some of us still hang out in the unofficial Dtoid chatroom) is Bloodylip, and he has a strange knack for drinks that have creamyness and juicyness at the same time. Its strange I know but the man is a legend for a reason.
The basic recipe is:
3 oz Irish Cream (Bailey's is best)
1 oz Citrus Liqueur (Tuaca is best)
1 oz Triple Sec
This one is pretty simple to make, but works best if you have a cocktail shaker. Take all of the ingredients and add them to a shaker that has ice, works best if you keep your liquor in the freezer, shake it all up and strain into a cocktail glass or a highball glass.
If you want to dilute the strength of the liquor you can always blend the concoction with the ice in your blender.
The drink should look something like this when finished.
Best Picture I Could Find...
There you have it, a Hard-Dreamsicle! Depending on your tolerance for alcohol, take it easy with these, if you're uninitiated in the ways of liquor, it might go straight to your head. Bloodylip thinks this drink sounds "nummy", so I guess that speaks to his character. Don't forget that you have to be a masculine manly-man to use the word "nummy" in this community.
*Note* Destructoid assumes no responsibility for the drink recipes posted by Excremento, nor the actions taken from imbibing said drinks, neither does Excremento. Remeber kids, drink in moderation you don't want alcohol poisoning. As always have something to eat before a night of drinking.
Well, I hope you guys all like it, please let me know what you think!
This week, I started packing some stuff up this week in preparation for me and the wife getting our own house. I had a lot of time to spend in front of ye olde bewbe toobe on Friday because of me and my wife's differing work schedules and thought that I would root around the cluttered room we use for storage for some sort of retro gaming experience.
When you come over to our apartment, you'd notice very quickly (if you're a gamer) that I still have my NES and my SNES attached to my 55" HDTV in the living room. You see, I am one of THOSE type of gamers that holds onto every single game that comes into their possession, including the copy of Bubsy for the SNES that I paid $80 for back when it came out. I still play my 'retro' systems just about every week and enjoy every minute of it.
Anyways, back to rooting around in the cluttered storage room.
I have most of my equipment/games in one corner of the room; the rest of the room is being utilized by my beautiful wife Mrs. Excremento. My most recent acquisition was from my friend who gave me his entire collection of NES gear including 20+ games I didn't own, the rest of the stuff got shipped to Mr. Adejuyigbe (aka Electro Lemon) so no I don't have anything else to share.
In his game collection were a few games that I adored playing when I was younger. I decided to crate his whole collection into the living room to spend some quality time with the awesomeness that is the NES.
Many of our younger gaming brethren are used to putting a game in the system and having it work the first time you switch on the power. Any of us from the NES generation know that to get games going and playing correctly on Nintendo's first American console, you need to have a bit of finesse. Whatever the trick may be: blowing, half inserting, slamming, or wedging, it is truly akin to sex how practiced the skill it is.
I started my retro gaming experience with Duck Tales, which is from the golden age where Capcom did great things with show licenses. The story involves the two main things that Scrooge McDuck was known for in the cartoon series: makin' himself richer, and getting into all sorts of trouble. The moment that the music started playing on the title screen, I found myself humming along to all the wonderful chip tunes like I was some sort of 8 year old that had a glass of Kool-Aid and some Handi-Snacks.
The people that think that games like this were for kids were out of their fucking minds. The difficulty for this game is just insane. You have 3 lives, each with 3 hits you can take until you die to finish this game. Sure you can pick up health restoring items, invincibility, and extra lives but you should know...there is no continue.
I got done playing Duck Tales fairly quickly and decided to move on to bigger and brighter things, such as PunchOut!!. Putting the game in my NES, I started to wonder how well my skill would have held up over the years. Amazingly, I got through the two tiers of opponents quickly (only King Hippo fucked me up), and enjoyed the laughable 'cut-scene' that happened after each major belt was won.
I got tired of trying to get to Mr. Dream (the final boxer instead of Mike Tyson) by myself so I decided to cheat and find a code that I could use from the internet. I entered the code with baited breath fully expecting to do somewhat well against the final opponent. I had my ass beat in less than 30 seconds...this point just hammered home what I already knew, that games have become much easier.
After my little bout (haha) with Punchout!! I decided to play a game that I didn't even realize I had in my collection, Double Dragon II: The Revenge. Anyone who was around for any of the Double Dragon games in the arcade can tell you that the series wasn't just any generic beat-em-up, it was THE beat-em-up. This great game's storyline furthered the exploits of Billy and Jimmy Lee and was a major departure from the first game where the damsel in distress isn't captured, but killed.
Unlike my the other NES games that I played on my retro day off, I spent more time playing Double Dragon II than both of the other games combined. I had a blast making my little 2D sprite guy beat the living hell out of other 2D sprite peoples. There were a few parts of the game that pissed me off, such as how easy it was to fall off ledges, and a battle inside a helicopter that has its door open at regular intervals to suck you and your opponent out.
This game was fun as hell to play, but ultimately frustrating because just like Duck Tales, there is no continue. Once you lost all 3 of your lives, it was truly game over. I haven't seen a "Game Over" screen in a long time, much less one that won't give you the option to continue.
I was just having a grand time re-living all of my childhood frustrations and joys. The great thing about the frustrations is that now I am an adult and have adult ways of working out frustrations that don't involve me throwing or biting my controller (beer and wanking take the place of those two), not to mention that I can go to any other game in my library at any time if I really get mad. All in all, I'd say that I had a really good day. Next time I'll have to preach on the greatness that is Super Castlevania IV for the SNES. Thanks for reading. read more
Man…where should I start? Never, in the year that I have been attending Destructoid have I been as mad as I am right now. I gave myself to the count of 10, I even tried walking it off. No go, I have to do this or it will bug me all week. Most people on this website know me as a pretty mild mannered and nice guy but I've just about had it with some people.
“You know for years I have been sitting by and listening to countless people whine about how the 360 sucks so bad, and how I got red ringed...”
Actually I don’t ‘know for years’, you need a comma there. What have you been sitting by? Are there really countless people ‘whining about the RRoD these days? The 360 has been on the Market for only a little more than 2 years so I think your ‘for years’ is bullshit.
“I remember a time back in 2000 when a little system called the PS2 came out and not to long after that people started crying about how there PS2 won't read discs... countless gamers had lost there systems due to this issues. Hell even I remember having to buy a PS2 cause of this issues... TWICE!”
*sigh* Again with the countless and the lack of commas. ‘There’ is a direction/place, ‘their’ denotes possession, and ‘they’re’ is a contraction for ‘they are’; learn these 3 rules or go Die In A Fire. Comparing the problems that the PS2 was having with the problems that the 360 has had is another bullshit point, the failure rate for PS2s was much lower than the supposed 30% failure rate that most Xbox 360’s were experiencing.
“I waited two years to buy the 360 cause I knew this was going to happen. It happened with the first XBOX it happen with the PS2, shit if I even remember correctly it happen to the Dreamcast also (remember the whole controller port issue) What I'm trying to say is learn from your past. You all set yourself up for buying the system so soon.”
Well whoopteefuckingdoo that you waited two years to buy a system. Do you want a prize for being behind the 8 ball for that length of time? You need to go back to remedial English and learn where to fucking use commas so you can separate your thoughts into cohesive phrases! I set myself up for being an early adopter? Fuck off with that logic you prick. You see yourself as smart for buying a game system when it’s half way through its life cycle? I see you as a pompous ass who has nothing better to do than put up a troll-ish blog on Destructoid.
“I bought my 360 5 months ago, I play COD4 for hours on end, Same with games like Bioshock and Oblivion. Games that push this system to it's limits. I use it as my DVD player, and my stereo in my house. My system stays on for most of the day... and I have never had any issues with it.”
So you’re saying here is that you’ve been burning the candle at both ends, you use it as a DVD player, and a game system. Give it some time and you will probably end up with having issues with it. In this age of optical media games, expect your system to eventually die, RRoD or not. Dude, CoD4 is available on both current gen systems and so is Oblivion, there’s no need to brag about games that aren’t exclusive.
“The 360 is the best system on the market today, it has the best online service, and it has the largest library of games out there.... so get off your Microsoft hating high horse and SHUT THE FUCK UP! you all brought it on yourself.”
You need to take your own advice and keep your fanboy opinions to yourself. This website’s blog is fueled by 2 major fucking rules that you need to learn yourself. First, STFUAJPG. Since you’re new here I’ll spell it all out for you: Shut The Fuck Up And Just Play Games. The second and most important rule of being a Cblogger is DON’T SUCK. You’ve failed on both of these rules and I can’t wait to see the ignorance you are going to be spouting at me for putting you in your place, you little fucking troll. GTFO my internets. read more
The joy that I have been experiencing with your system playing games like Lost Odyssey and Mass Effect have been rather substantial. This does not however excuse you from providing me with an online experience (that I must pay for) which has seen its fair share of problems in the last couple of months.
I thought that the concept was pretty straightforward. I give you money, you give me uninterrupted service and speedy connections with people who are a joy to play against/with. I do enjoy the fact that you have a great file service for downloading demos and game videos, but your constant lack of being able to see upcoming service spikes has led me to think that you might not know what you are doing when it comes to online connectivity.
This leads me to my conundrum, I enjoy the 1~2 matches that I play against online opponents every month but I don't see why I must pay for a feature that is included with a game. Should not the creators of said game and online capabilities be responsible for paying for the server time that might be used by its customers? Shouldn't all games have a memorable single player experience that I won't need multiplayer like Halo: Combat Evolved? Did I not pay you $60 for a new game that in all actuality shouldn't cost that much considering that I pay $8 a month for online connectivity?
Microsoft, I have to say that after buying my PS3 and enjoying the free multiplayer for my games, not to mention the promise of Home soon, has led me to this. As of this month, you will no longer be allowed to take money from me for a service that should be provided for free. I will no longer buy multiplayer specific games for the Xbox 360, but will instead pick up said game on the PS3. This latest fiasco with the CoD4 maps has left a sour taste in my mouth. The money I save from not paying for your service will go into a savings that will pay for real social activities, not the one that you promised me with Xbox Live.
There are plenty of others here on D-Toid that do the same. I thought to myself "Wouldn't it be nice to share some sophisticated drink recipes with fellow adults?" That's where this posting comes from, the love I have for all drinks. So if you too are 21 years old or above, stay a spell, crack open a 'cold one' and join me as I share tonight's recipe.
Aerox's Lunchbox
Ok gang, here's the story. I hang out in the IRC a whole lot, probably most of my day that I'm awake. There are a few others that do the same, one of such IRC homies is Aerox. Aerox has been one of the most stoic and vocal members of the community and not to mention a pretty stand up guy. I asked the room one day to let me know what drinks they enjoy. Besides the typical beer and wine responses, there was one voice that came out on top of it all...Aerox screamed at the top of his lungs (which is the same as BOLDED ALLCAPS in chat rooms) The LUNCHBOX!!! I took his silly girly drink recipe and tried it out, then I tried it again, then again, and again. This is probably one of the most tasty girly drinks I've had in a long long time.
The basic recipe is:
2 Oz. Amaretto Liqueur 2 Oz. Beer (An Amber or Lager will suffice)
3 Oz. Orange Juice (If you're nasty like me, get High Pulp)
First, get yourself a glass and pour in about 3-4 fingers of orange juice. Next, just pour in the Amaretto. The final step is getting a large shot glass and filling it up with Beer. Now, take the shot glass and drop it into the glass with OJ and Amaretto, chug, rinse, repeat, you're done!
The drink should look something like this when finished.
What kind of douche puts OJ in a beer glass at Oktoberfest?
There you have it, Aerox's Lunchbox! Depending on your tolerance for alcohol, take it easy with these, if you're uninitiated in the ways of liquor, it might go straight to your head. Well, the funny thing is that the mixture of OJ with beer makes a pretty delicious concoction. If you are having a hard time in the morning shaking off that hangover, this makes a great "hair of the dog that bit you" drink.
*Note* Destructoid assumes no responsibility for the drink recipes posted by Excremento, nor the actions taken from imbibing said drinks, neither does Excremento. Remeber kids, drink in moderation you don't want alcohol poisoning. As always have something to eat before a night of drinking.
Well, I hope you guys all like it, please let me know what you think!
There it is right there, my bebe, your future ruler and master (ALL HAIL LIL' EXCREMENTO)! We still don't have any idea what the gender is but its only a matter of time until we do know, and you'll be some of the first to know along with me. I'm very excited for it to hurry and get here so I can be a dad. I wish the same could be said for Mrs. Excremento, she's been suffering from morning sickness (should be called all-day sickness) and can't wait either, although for different reasons.
Here's a little bit closer picture of the child just lounging away, growing, getting stronger, training to be the next generation of video gamer.
The final shot that I have to share with you all, my kid already ready to pick fights with people 36x times its size. My kid, saying put em up, put em up! Look closely, its a straight ahead picture instead of the profile pictures above.
My real name is Xopher Reed. I've been a videogame acolyte for as long as I can remember. I have well over 25 years of video game experience starting with the Commodore 64 and Intellivision. I can look back at my life year by year and remember fondly what game I was playing at that point in my existence.
Not being content with my sitting on my ass and not proclaiming to the world my views on the gaming industry was the reason I started a blog here on Dtoid. After seeing that my personal blog was going nowhere, I decided that the community here on Destructoid was the only way to go. I'm still here, updating as often as I can for all of your enjoyment.
Any of you out there who wish to contact me directly can do so at:
Destructoid is an independently-run publication forged by our love of video games and the gaming community's need of accountable enthusiast press living the dream since March 16, 2006
