Disclaimer / Preface / Biohazard Warning:
I feel a little guilty reading Destructoid daily and not taking full advantage of the right third of the page, so here I am. Writing in a blog. And already using incomplete sentences! Boy, this is going to go well. Anyways, as a flimsy mask for my shameless Dtoid contest entries, here is some stuff about my development as a gamer.

The early years, or, "You've got to blow harder into the cartridge":


I'm too young to claim roots in the arcade gaming era, or even the beginnings of home consoles. Rather, I was born three years after the release of the NES. Naturally, this was the first contact I would have with video games. Is it a good thing that I didn't get to experience such classic titles as E.T. or Custer's Revenge? That, readers, is a question I leave to you.

Anyways, it's the beginning of the 90's, a decade with the misfortune of being right before the dawn of a new millennium. Bush Mk I is still in le Blanc House, and the USSR is on the verge of dissolving, arguably at the expense of James Bond's purpose in life. Much, much, much more importantly, Super Mario Bros. 3 has hit the US markets! This is also when the NES enters our household. Funny what you can get just by pointing your finger at something and crying....
*ahem* Not surprisingly, when my parents bought it, I lacked the physical and mental facilities to properly enjoy the hardware. My parents did what anyone would do: play the thing themselves and allow me to enjoy being in its presence.

(Note here the parallels between playing video games because your child can't, and playing video games because your friends aren't gamers but they put up with it and watch.)

I distinctly remember enjoying the sights and sounds of SMB 3. Lacking fully developed cognitive faculties, I took pleasure in the pretty pixels and funny sounds. However, I was immensely disappointed when, after completing World 1-3, my father shut the console down and declared bedtime.

My reasons for complaint back then were simple: surely this whimsical display on the television could continue! After all, there was clearly more to be done. While I had no idea who Mario was, or why he was running around, I enjoyed watching him flatten various objects and demolish bricks with his head. I couldn't grasp back then the concept of conflict resolution, i.e. "find and rescue the Princess." To me, back then, this was just a complex substitute for a mobile.

It would be a long time before I could appreciate plot within a video game. Back then, to know what was actually going on you had to read the instruction booklet, and even then some games didn't even have a story to begin with. Duck Hunt, for example, was just that.
Let's not forget that I was illiterate as well. But that's beside the point! Read all the Shakespeare you want, those ghosts chasing Pac-Man aren't going to start developing any character.



But before I even get to storyline appreciation, much less a grasp of "good" and "bad" video games, I need to starting playing this "entertainment system" for myself. All that, and more, on the next ATDM(C)L.

p.s. Please excuse my paint.