Typically, I like to take an analytical approach when I write. In fact, sometimes I intellectualize so much that people are left to wonder what the heck I'm talking about. Because of that, I decided that today, I'll take a slightly different approach. I am going to gush like the fanboy I am. Not about Halo 3, Rock Band or the Xbox 360. This time, I'm going to tell you all about my secret crush on Destructoid associate editor Tiff Chow.
I mean, let's just get it out of the way. .tiff is sexy. Even in that little black and white avatar, she looks smokin' hot. I've had a thing for brunettes in glasses (oh, and just as a b-t-dub, "brunette" is the female version of "brunette") since I was a first-grader in love with Lois Lane (Christopher Reeve opposite). Obviously, though, .tiff's good looks go beyond his wavy brown mane and chic frameless glasses.
Check out that mask! I mean, don't get me wrong, I'm not into Halloween, but I can tell .tiff goes to the gym regularly enough to keep toned and fit. Or maybe she's just been using Wii fit like this girl. Seriously, though, .tiff can make be my Taiko King anytime.
Besides an interest in tasty treats (like cake), .tiff and I have other stuff in common, too. Like, okay, we both totally like wearing Winnie the Pooh hats
Beyond looks, masks and Pooh Bear, there is still plenty to find charming about .tiff. One thing I specifically enjoy is how controversial she is. I mean, what other associate editor incites people to write hateposts?
[img](No one would write a hatepost about .tiff)[/img]
Fanboy drama is funny. In fact, .tiff has been called a pillow fort builder and a Californian. sHe's so hard to read! Actually, I guess people just have trouble understanding when .tiff is being sarcastic.
Her art posts alone makes her a bad girl in my mind, and you know how us guys love bad girls. Also, tattoos don't hurt either.
So the next time you read news or an editorial written by my girlfriend--er, um, Tiff Chow--try not to get distracted by how sexy she is. OMG, do you think she'll read this?
Oh, and let me add...
Chaka chaka pata pon.
I love you Coon. This is amazing.
I C Wut U Did Thur...Y'all...
I wish I had that pic of you and popa handy coon, I'd do one of these for you.
You sexy, soco-drinkin(note: chugging) sombitch.
Because of this, me raping you at PAX will be extra intense
*lol*
I knew someone was going to do one of these..lol.
I, too, c wut u did thur.
In before post made for Sterling.
So... how about dem Sterlingz?
wow. this wasn't very funny.
look, I just don't see how this is appropriate. Tiff'a a woman on teh internet and this just isn't cool
...
bowchickahonkhonk
Coonskin sleeps with a .tiff avatar pillow in one arm, and a bottle of jack daniels in the other.
This is relevant to my interests.
Oh like you all werent thinking it.
Rule 0: Coon is always right.
ahhh, good old yokes :3
Yashoki, gtfo. Seriously...
relevent to my intrests.
LAFFS!
You are spot on. I Wii-Fit my Tako Face 3 times a day.
.Tiff and Collette need to battle on top of a volcano for the title of Queen of Destructoid.
It can be on a volcano adjacent to the one Rev and Chad will fight on, and they will both fight during SIMULTANEOUS VOLCANIC ERUPTIONS!!!
That's it, I'm calling Michael Bay to secure the movie deal.
Tiff is a phenomenal woman, one who should always have a constant supply of hugs at her beck and call.