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About Me
Real name: Mike

Amazing gif!



bleh, man
Age:29
Lives in: Dallas, Tx
Occupation: Mayor of Metro City
Member of: Official Destructoid Beard Club
Consoles: 360, ds, snes, ps2
Hobbies: Games, reading, guitar, drinking

Because The GHost is teh awesome, my dtoid playing card:


Wanderingpixel is also awesome.


Current Games:

All of the things


Old Blogs:
Teh Randomtoid Linktoid (This is all my randomtoid blogs in one spot)
My Dtoid Thank You Note
One year w00t!
Avatar Chat
My Feelings On "Next-Gen"
Bleh-views:
Star Wars: The Force Unleashed
Lost: Via Domus
Community Discussion Time!
Gaming Journalism
Oh snap! Front paged!
Playing with Others: The Death of Split-Screen



My Hero:



My Left 4 Dead Dream Movie



Longcat:



Myspace profile: what the fuck is a myspace and when did this get here?

To e-mail malicious hatemail: blehman646@gmail.com

To whomever drew my header: Awesome
Note: old header link here

For Wiisucks:
Hi! My name is Jack Klassen.! I'm a completely ordinary teenage boy from San Diego, California. My interests include soccer, surfing, writing poetry, and luge. I am homeschooled by my father who fought in the Korean War and was exposed to nerve gas. He is kind of crazy but I still love him. We got the Internet two years ago and I started making new friends on Yahoo! messenger. Surprisingly, most of these new friends were older men who wanted to have illegal, underage sex with me. Needless to say, I got a boner like a rocketship and cybersex quickly became my favorite thing in the entire world. Wait, did I say boner like a rocketship? I meant my vagina got as wet as Lake Titicaca. I started saving all of the hot chat sessions I was having with the Pakistanis, lesbians, child molesters and other monsters who were instant messaging me all day and all night, and I decided to put them up here on this website so you can see exactly how disgusting the entire human race is. Since then, I have been in a waterskiing accident that mangled my genitals beyond repair, been diagnosed with cerebral palsy, brain cancer, and Crohn's disease, learned to speak Urdu and French, covered my naked body in superglue, went to French lesbian camp, made a Hindu eat a roast beef sandwich out of my vagina, and ruined perfectly good cybersex for at least one hundred people. Use the menu above to find out more about me and start reading my sexy adventures,





Also, I make people from Pheonix Wright cry:


Also, also, sparkle:


Also, also, also, jiggles:


Also, also, also, also, Trent!


Alsox5, kitteh:


Also, X-mas Shake(a.k.a. itemforty is teh sex)
Gamer Profile
3DS friend code:
Steam: blehmeng
Battle:
PSN:
Mii:
Gamertag: blehmeng
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TAAANK!
blehman | 11:22 AM on 10.06.2009 80 comments




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69 comments | showing # 1 to 50
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next 50 comments

Chris Carter's Avatar - Comment posted on 10/06/2009 11:27
Chris Carter
GET THE FUCK OUT SPAMMER
Diverse's Avatar - Comment posted on 10/06/2009 11:30
Diverse
typical furfaggotry
blehman's Avatar - Comment posted on 10/06/2009 11:31
blehman
Oh, I'm sorry Mag. I didn't give you a chance to show your PC boner in this blog.
MrSadistic's Avatar - Comment posted on 10/06/2009 11:33
MrSadistic
Bill slowly kissed the Tank's tender lips, while caressing his tough, but ample buttocks. Francis looked on with a jealous rage, but realized he could not stop looking. Slowly, Francis rubbed his sweaty, muscular chest. Feeling his nipples harden, he knew deep down in his heart that he must have both Bill and the Tank. In a flash, Francis jumped up behind the Tank and slowly started to lick his back. Bill was caught off-guard, but welcomed a helping hand. "I always knew you were curious", said Bill, who was slightly out of breath from all the excitement. Francis smiled back at Bill, and never said a word. Slowly, Bill inserted his hand into Francis' pants. While Bill was fondling his genitals, Francis looked down at Bill with a passion. "You did always know your way around a fully loaded gun", Francis said with a smirk.
blehman's Avatar - Comment posted on 10/06/2009 11:38
blehman
"We've got weapons over here," Bill said coyly.
SilverDragon1979's Avatar - Comment posted on 10/06/2009 11:40
SilverDragon1979
um .......
Hoygeit's Avatar - Comment posted on 10/06/2009 11:53
Hoygeit
Uh...
DJDuffy 's Avatar - Comment posted on 10/06/2009 11:54
DJDuffy
um...did the temperature just go up in here? CUZ IT's STEAMY!! <3
Takeshi's Avatar - Comment posted on 10/06/2009 12:13
Takeshi
I don't get it. I'm Dutch.
blehman's Avatar - Comment posted on 10/06/2009 12:16
blehman
They have weight watchers for that, Takeshi.
Senisan's Avatar - Comment posted on 10/06/2009 12:18
Senisan
"Grabbin' peeelz" whispered Louis.
Takeshi's Avatar - Comment posted on 10/06/2009 12:20
Takeshi
In that case... Wait. I still don't get it.
blehman's Avatar - Comment posted on 10/06/2009 12:23
blehman
"I hate protection, and lubrication, and undressing," said Francis. "But you know what I don't hate? I don't hate man vests."
blehman's Avatar - Comment posted on 10/06/2009 12:30
blehman
I'll pull one over on the recappers so hard. They love it, the little sluts.
Naim Master's Avatar - Comment posted on 10/06/2009 12:31
Naim Master
Needs moar futa Zoey.
Blasto's Avatar - Comment posted on 10/06/2009 12:32
Blasto
Prepare for 25 pounce damage, baby.
Blasto's Avatar - Comment posted on 10/06/2009 12:37
Blasto
Btw Sadistic, Tanks don't have a bottom jaw, so it would be lip...unless you're talking asslips, in which case, that's hot. They have a huge tongue though, which is why they're so popular with all the witches.
pendelton21's Avatar - Comment posted on 10/06/2009 12:44
pendelton21
Oh, man, I can't WAIT to put this in Failtoid...
blehman's Avatar - Comment posted on 10/06/2009 12:46
blehman
I'll put my fail in your toid, pendleton.
blehman's Avatar - Comment posted on 10/06/2009 12:56
blehman
Zoey, coming in from the other room where she was keeping watch, was treated to quite an eyeful. Francis, hand firmly down Bill's tightened, camo pants, was sucking on the tank's finger, while Bill, attention obviously diverted from the mass of muscular zombie ahead of him, attempted to fit all of Louis's flashlight down his throat.
pendelton21's Avatar - Comment posted on 10/06/2009 13:01
pendelton21
I wanna see what the Smoker's gonna do with that tongue of his...
blehman's Avatar - Comment posted on 10/06/2009 13:06
blehman
Louis, meanwhile, was elbow deep in hot tank action, which, being a zombie and made of dead flesh, gave willingly to his franticly pumping arm. Out of the corner of her eye, Zoey saw a familiar sight which made her skin run cold. Coming from around a corner and slowly making it's way up Francis's leather bound pants was a smoker's tounge.
Takeshi's Avatar - Comment posted on 10/06/2009 13:07
Takeshi
Oh I finally get it. You like comics. Well I found a great one. You might have seen it before but it's sooo good I just had to post it again:
BluDesign's Avatar - Comment posted on 10/06/2009 13:10
BluDesign
...

This explains all the humidity outside.
blehman's Avatar - Comment posted on 10/06/2009 13:12
blehman
Takeshi, why do you hate my freedoms? All you dutch are the same, bearded, jihading, freedom hating, nazi, jewish, and are watched secretly on webcam while you sleep.

;)
pendelton21's Avatar - Comment posted on 10/06/2009 13:19
pendelton21
@bleh:
Don't forget Socialist.
Takeshi's Avatar - Comment posted on 10/06/2009 13:24
Takeshi
The Dutch,



bearded, jihading, freedom hating, nazi, jewish, and are watched secretly on webcam while you sleep.
Takeshi's Avatar - Comment posted on 10/06/2009 13:25
Takeshi
Also Socialists.
Takeshi's Avatar - Comment posted on 10/06/2009 13:26
Takeshi
also wink.
pendelton21's Avatar - Comment posted on 10/06/2009 13:29
pendelton21
@Takeshi;
That is the hottest picture I have EVER SEEN.
Chris Carter's Avatar - Comment posted on 10/06/2009 13:35
Chris Carter
PC HAS MOUSE
blehman's Avatar - Comment posted on 10/06/2009 13:35
blehman
hahah Garison looks SHOCKED
DJDuffy 's Avatar - Comment posted on 10/06/2009 13:42
DJDuffy
Garison and Pew sitting in a tree!!
Takeshi's Avatar - Comment posted on 10/06/2009 13:45
Takeshi
Haha! Indeed. And Pew looks determined.
MrSadistic's Avatar - Comment posted on 10/06/2009 13:53
MrSadistic
The Smoker caught Zoey in his elongated tongue. She was powerless to fight it, but she thought to herself "Do I really want to put up a struggle against it?". The thought of extreme pleasure from The Smoker's tongue, made Zoey moist in her panties. She felt embarassed, but deep down she knew she secretly loved what was about to happen to her.
blehman's Avatar - Comment posted on 10/06/2009 14:22
blehman
And I'm sure you'll write a blog about how that affected you as a child, mk. :p
Takeshi's Avatar - Comment posted on 10/06/2009 14:24
Takeshi
mk, what's with your obsession for Krow?
blehman's Avatar - Comment posted on 10/06/2009 14:30
blehman
OH NOES INSENSITIVITY ON THE INTERNET WHAT DO I DO?

Please don't baaaaw on my blog. Get's it all sticky. And what's your deal with Krow? You do know that he's underage, right?
Chris Carter's Avatar - Comment posted on 10/06/2009 14:31
Chris Carter
@MK
Takeshi is still mad because I bash the PS3's shortcomings (despite proclaiming my love for it), and I ruined Harry Potter 6 for him.

Blehman just hates me and wants a computer to play Left 4 Dead on.

SO MUCH HATE
blehman's Avatar - Comment posted on 10/06/2009 14:32
blehman
@Mag

Get your bias out of here you elitist!
MrSadistic's Avatar - Comment posted on 10/06/2009 14:33
MrSadistic
I like where this blog is heading (ps my butt).
blehman's Avatar - Comment posted on 10/06/2009 14:35
blehman
@maisharona

That's nice dear. Being mature on the internet is nice. Now go blog about it.
Monodi's Avatar - Comment posted on 10/06/2009 14:49
Monodi
NOM NOM
pendelton21's Avatar - Comment posted on 10/06/2009 14:52
pendelton21
@Sadistic:
I like your butt as well.
ArcticFox's Avatar - Comment posted on 10/06/2009 14:57
ArcticFox
I fapped! To L4D FANFIC THAT IS!
ArcticFox's Avatar - Comment posted on 10/06/2009 14:57
ArcticFox
Wait, what?
blehman's Avatar - Comment posted on 10/06/2009 15:01
blehman
Sounds like somebody has a case of the "jealousies".
garison's Avatar - Comment posted on 10/06/2009 15:10
garison
I did not know that picture exists. Also, who kisses with their eyes open? What a loser.
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