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About Me
Real name: Mike
Amazing gif!
bleh, man
Age:29
Lives in: Dallas, Tx
Occupation: Mayor of Metro City
Member of: Official Destructoid Beard Club
Consoles: 360, ds, snes, ps2
Hobbies: Games, reading, guitar, drinking
Because The GHost is teh awesome, my dtoid playing card:
Wanderingpixel is also awesome.
Current Games:
All of the things
Old Blogs:
Teh Randomtoid Linktoid (This is all my randomtoid blogs in one spot)
My Dtoid Thank You Note
One year w00t!
Avatar Chat
My Feelings On "Next-Gen"
Bleh-views:
Star Wars: The Force Unleashed
Lost: Via Domus
Community Discussion Time!
Gaming Journalism
Oh snap! Front paged!
Playing with Others: The Death of Split-Screen
My Hero:
My Left 4 Dead Dream Movie
Longcat:
Myspace profile: what the fuck is a myspace and when did this get here?
To e-mail malicious hatemail: blehman646@gmail.com
To whomever drew my header: Awesome
Note: old header link here
For Wiisucks:
Hi! My name is Jack Klassen.! I'm a completely ordinary teenage boy from San Diego, California. My interests include soccer, surfing, writing poetry, and luge. I am homeschooled by my father who fought in the Korean War and was exposed to nerve gas. He is kind of crazy but I still love him. We got the Internet two years ago and I started making new friends on Yahoo! messenger. Surprisingly, most of these new friends were older men who wanted to have illegal, underage sex with me. Needless to say, I got a boner like a rocketship and cybersex quickly became my favorite thing in the entire world. Wait, did I say boner like a rocketship? I meant my vagina got as wet as Lake Titicaca. I started saving all of the hot chat sessions I was having with the Pakistanis, lesbians, child molesters and other monsters who were instant messaging me all day and all night, and I decided to put them up here on this website so you can see exactly how disgusting the entire human race is. Since then, I have been in a waterskiing accident that mangled my genitals beyond repair, been diagnosed with cerebral palsy, brain cancer, and Crohn's disease, learned to speak Urdu and French, covered my naked body in superglue, went to French lesbian camp, made a Hindu eat a roast beef sandwich out of my vagina, and ruined perfectly good cybersex for at least one hundred people. Use the menu above to find out more about me and start reading my sexy adventures,
Also, I make people from Pheonix Wright cry:
Also, also, sparkle:
Also, also, also, jiggles:
Also, also, also, also, Trent!
Alsox5, kitteh:
Also, X-mas Shake(a.k.a. itemforty is teh sex)
Amazing gif!
bleh, man
Age:29
Lives in: Dallas, Tx
Occupation: Mayor of Metro City
Member of: Official Destructoid Beard Club
Consoles: 360, ds, snes, ps2
Hobbies: Games, reading, guitar, drinking
Because The GHost is teh awesome, my dtoid playing card:
Wanderingpixel is also awesome.
Current Games:
All of the things
Old Blogs:
Teh Randomtoid Linktoid (This is all my randomtoid blogs in one spot)
My Dtoid Thank You Note
One year w00t!
Avatar Chat
My Feelings On "Next-Gen"
Bleh-views:
Star Wars: The Force Unleashed
Lost: Via Domus
Community Discussion Time!
Gaming Journalism
Oh snap! Front paged!
Playing with Others: The Death of Split-Screen
My Hero:
My Left 4 Dead Dream Movie
Longcat:
Myspace profile: what the fuck is a myspace and when did this get here?
To e-mail malicious hatemail: blehman646@gmail.com
To whomever drew my header: Awesome
Note: old header link here
For Wiisucks:
Hi! My name is Jack Klassen.! I'm a completely ordinary teenage boy from San Diego, California. My interests include soccer, surfing, writing poetry, and luge. I am homeschooled by my father who fought in the Korean War and was exposed to nerve gas. He is kind of crazy but I still love him. We got the Internet two years ago and I started making new friends on Yahoo! messenger. Surprisingly, most of these new friends were older men who wanted to have illegal, underage sex with me. Needless to say, I got a boner like a rocketship and cybersex quickly became my favorite thing in the entire world. Wait, did I say boner like a rocketship? I meant my vagina got as wet as Lake Titicaca. I started saving all of the hot chat sessions I was having with the Pakistanis, lesbians, child molesters and other monsters who were instant messaging me all day and all night, and I decided to put them up here on this website so you can see exactly how disgusting the entire human race is. Since then, I have been in a waterskiing accident that mangled my genitals beyond repair, been diagnosed with cerebral palsy, brain cancer, and Crohn's disease, learned to speak Urdu and French, covered my naked body in superglue, went to French lesbian camp, made a Hindu eat a roast beef sandwich out of my vagina, and ruined perfectly good cybersex for at least one hundred people. Use the menu above to find out more about me and start reading my sexy adventures,
Also, I make people from Pheonix Wright cry:
Also, also, sparkle:
Also, also, also, jiggles:
Also, also, also, also, Trent!
Alsox5, kitteh:
Also, X-mas Shake(a.k.a. itemforty is teh sex)
Gamer Profile
3DS friend code:
Steam: blehmeng
Battle:
PSN:
Mii:
Gamertag: blehmeng
Steam: blehmeng
Battle:
PSN:
Mii:
Gamertag: blehmeng
Following (112)
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..and because I just remembered it. So it's Christmas time, or (if you're a liberal/conservative douchebag) the "Holiday's", and many of you get to (have to) see family. Now, not everyone is in the mood to see family this time, or anytime, of year and needs something to help them, shall we say, gtfo?
Here's where CD Baby.com can help you out. Presenting, even though it's not back in stock yet, and most of you have seen it before, A Brutal Christmas: The Season in Chaos. 
Now I know you're out there saying, "blehman, what all do I get with this charming cd?" To which I reply, "Hold the fuck on, I'm getting there." Sounds of the Dead Records brings forth a CD for the holiday season like no other before it. A Brutal Christmas: The Season in Chaos has assembled 11 bands bent on changing the face of the holiday season. Each band takes a seasonal classic and transforms it for the truly metal at heart - and definitely NOT for the faint of heart. The musical styles vary greatly from song to song, but never fear, the metal theme is present on every track, including: * The shrill raw black metal sounds of Kekal, * The precision timing of thrash masters Archer, * The Nile like depths of Hearken (who's death metal stylings defy pigeon holing) * The Emperor influenced, progressive black stylings of Frost Like Ashes * The Down-esque groove of Faithbomb * The high class hybrid metal of Royal Anguish (featuring guest performance by Henrik from Mistral) * The grinding brutality of Frank's Enemy * The guttural power of Tortured Conscience * The original sounds of EverSINcEve, Pure Defiance, and Death Requisite With nearly 45 minutes of music this CD is enough to send those relatives who only show up at the holidays on an extremely twisted and demented roller coaster ride. Christmas will never be the same. Now, what else could you ever want for Christmas time relaxation? So if you're interested, go ahead and head on over to the website, where (for some reason) you can download and listen to all the songs. For free. Not really thinking ahead there, huh guys? http://cdbaby.com/cd/brutalchristmas Please note, I think this cd fucking sucks, and anyone who actually likes these crappy metal bands, please gtfo my post. Thank you.
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Living the dream since March 16, 2006
Living the dream since March 16, 2006
I lol'd.
And yeah, family... I got an aunt that is a pain in the ass. She is the typical fat, not married and havent got kids, she talks and talks because when she is alone locked in her department she only has her plants to talk to. So in christmas time we have to invite her, and suffer... in silence since she is talking nonsense as usual and you wish for death (in silence).
Of course, you can always drink... but last year I made an scene. I will try to get that CD this year. I have to learn from the US military and their interrogation techniques with music.
BUT, But, but, you only get 2-minute samples on the website. So if you're simply dying to know how Hearken wraps up their complex version of Oh Come All Ye Faithful, you've got to buy the CD.