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About Me
Real name: Mike

Amazing gif!



bleh, man
Age:29
Lives in: Dallas, Tx
Occupation: Mayor of Metro City
Member of: Official Destructoid Beard Club
Consoles: 360, ds, snes, ps2
Hobbies: Games, reading, guitar, drinking

Because The GHost is teh awesome, my dtoid playing card:


Wanderingpixel is also awesome.


Current Games:

All of the things


Old Blogs:
Teh Randomtoid Linktoid (This is all my randomtoid blogs in one spot)
My Dtoid Thank You Note
One year w00t!
Avatar Chat
My Feelings On "Next-Gen"
Bleh-views:
Star Wars: The Force Unleashed
Lost: Via Domus
Community Discussion Time!
Gaming Journalism
Oh snap! Front paged!
Playing with Others: The Death of Split-Screen



My Hero:



My Left 4 Dead Dream Movie



Longcat:



Myspace profile: what the fuck is a myspace and when did this get here?

To e-mail malicious hatemail: blehman646@gmail.com

To whomever drew my header: Awesome
Note: old header link here

For Wiisucks:
Hi! My name is Jack Klassen.! I'm a completely ordinary teenage boy from San Diego, California. My interests include soccer, surfing, writing poetry, and luge. I am homeschooled by my father who fought in the Korean War and was exposed to nerve gas. He is kind of crazy but I still love him. We got the Internet two years ago and I started making new friends on Yahoo! messenger. Surprisingly, most of these new friends were older men who wanted to have illegal, underage sex with me. Needless to say, I got a boner like a rocketship and cybersex quickly became my favorite thing in the entire world. Wait, did I say boner like a rocketship? I meant my vagina got as wet as Lake Titicaca. I started saving all of the hot chat sessions I was having with the Pakistanis, lesbians, child molesters and other monsters who were instant messaging me all day and all night, and I decided to put them up here on this website so you can see exactly how disgusting the entire human race is. Since then, I have been in a waterskiing accident that mangled my genitals beyond repair, been diagnosed with cerebral palsy, brain cancer, and Crohn's disease, learned to speak Urdu and French, covered my naked body in superglue, went to French lesbian camp, made a Hindu eat a roast beef sandwich out of my vagina, and ruined perfectly good cybersex for at least one hundred people. Use the menu above to find out more about me and start reading my sexy adventures,





Also, I make people from Pheonix Wright cry:


Also, also, sparkle:


Also, also, also, jiggles:


Also, also, also, also, Trent!


Alsox5, kitteh:


Also, X-mas Shake(a.k.a. itemforty is teh sex)
Gamer Profile
3DS friend code:
Steam: blehmeng
Battle:
PSN:
Mii:
Gamertag: blehmeng
Following (112)
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Happy Birthday Aborto TheFetus! (NSFW)
blehman | 12:53 PM on 09.15.2009 42 comments


I heard you liek pokemans, so I got you some.



















Is this post awesome? Vote it up!

13

Those who have fapped:  meijin3  


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40 comments | showing # 1 to 40
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vexed alex's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/15/2009 12:59
vexed alex
**Cries blood**
blehman's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/15/2009 12:59
blehman


Happy Aborto, Birthday!
vexed alex's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/15/2009 12:59
vexed alex
Also, happy birthday, smelly!
timtheterrible's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/15/2009 13:00
timtheterrible
Mudkip-Chan is pretty amazing.
Y0j1mb0's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/15/2009 13:00
Y0j1mb0
Happy Birthday you 12 year old looking Pokemon fanatic!
de BLOO's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/15/2009 13:01
de BLOO
BWAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHHAHAA

God dayum Smelly. Happy burfday cracka
Joanna Mueller's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/15/2009 13:15
Joanna Mueller
That chick without arms is hot. Also, happy birthday fetus.
Elsa's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/15/2009 13:18
Elsa
Happy Birthday Aborto!!!
Kryptinite's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/15/2009 13:20
Kryptinite
HAPPY BIRTHDAY BUDDY!
Silverback 55's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/15/2009 13:21
Silverback 55
Happy Birthday Sam... er, I mean Aborto.
Brian Szabelski's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/15/2009 13:25
Brian Szabelski
Happy birthday, Aborto! :D
FatherChesz's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/15/2009 13:27
FatherChesz
Hm. After this, I definitely liek Mudkipz! Happy birthday!
CelicaCrazed's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/15/2009 13:30
CelicaCrazed
Aborted fetuses can't have birthdays!

But Happy Birthday nonetheless :P
DaedHead8's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/15/2009 13:46
DaedHead8
Happy birthday Aborto! Happy birthday Samit!
AgentMOO's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/15/2009 13:58
AgentMOO
Happy burfdays!
Bulkmailer's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/15/2009 14:04
Bulkmailer
Happy birthday.
Darren Nakamura's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/15/2009 14:10
Darren Nakamura
Happy birthday, Aborto. You may share a birthday with -D-. I'm not sure.
ZombiePlatypus's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/15/2009 14:13
ZombiePlatypus
Happy birthday, you fetus you.
Knivy's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/15/2009 14:28
Knivy
Happy birthday aborto!!

People that were also born this date: Samit Sarkar
PappaDukes's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/15/2009 14:34
PappaDukes


SOOOOOO FUCKING HAWT!!!!!!!!
Takeshi's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/15/2009 14:57
Takeshi
Happy get out of your mums vagina day Fetus!
Volkarin's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/15/2009 15:29
Volkarin
Happy birthday Aborto.
Sean Carey's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/15/2009 15:50
Sean Carey
Birthdays -- Gotta catch 'em, all! Have a good one, Aborto!
wanderingpixel's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/15/2009 15:56
wanderingpixel
I likes the pokemen.
Deathofthedead's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/15/2009 17:10
Deathofthedead
PappaDukes is absolutely correct.
F Whipple's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/15/2009 17:16
F Whipple
Happy birthday
Maurice Tan's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/15/2009 17:32
Maurice Tan
Happy Birthday Aborto!! <3
linuxguy's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/15/2009 17:51
linuxguy
happy unbirthday Aborto!
Puppy Licks's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/15/2009 18:30
Puppy Licks
Happy birthday Aborto! Rock the fuck out!

Pappadukes; wut? WUT?!
Naim Master's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/15/2009 18:59
Naim Master
Happy birthday guy-that-gave-me-some-free-swag!
nademagnet's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/15/2009 19:22
nademagnet
HAAAAAAAPY BIIIIRTH DAAAAAAYY! 222222222222 UUUUUUUUUUU!!!!!
meijin3's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/15/2009 20:02
meijin3
That first Mudkip is fucking sexy
ace of knaves's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/15/2009 20:04
ace of knaves
HAPPY BIRTHDAY MAN IS YOU! Also yes, YES, sure, NO, double yes, HELL YES, yes, and I'll take my chances with whatever's in the suit.
Funktastic's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/15/2009 20:31
Funktastic
MERRY BIRTHDAY YO! ^_^
Evil Cheese's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/15/2009 21:34
Evil Cheese
You missed a few.











Quisling's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/16/2009 01:11
Quisling
Ah! It's still Aborto's birthday on the West Coast!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY ABORTO!
Krow's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/16/2009 05:03
Krow
HAPPY BIRTHDAY YESTERDAY ABORTO, SORRY I MISSED IT
Sven Wohl's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/16/2009 10:31
Sven Wohl
Happy Birthday!!!
Trebz's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/16/2009 18:20
Trebz
Happy really late happy birthday.

Sorry.
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