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About Me
Real name: Mike

Amazing gif!



bleh, man
Age:29
Lives in: Dallas, Tx
Occupation: Mayor of Metro City
Member of: Official Destructoid Beard Club
Consoles: 360, ds, snes, ps2
Hobbies: Games, reading, guitar, drinking

Because The GHost is teh awesome, my dtoid playing card:


Wanderingpixel is also awesome.


Current Games:

All of the things


Old Blogs:
Teh Randomtoid Linktoid (This is all my randomtoid blogs in one spot)
My Dtoid Thank You Note
One year w00t!
Avatar Chat
My Feelings On "Next-Gen"
Bleh-views:
Star Wars: The Force Unleashed
Lost: Via Domus
Community Discussion Time!
Gaming Journalism
Oh snap! Front paged!
Playing with Others: The Death of Split-Screen



My Hero:



My Left 4 Dead Dream Movie



Longcat:



Myspace profile: what the fuck is a myspace and when did this get here?

To e-mail malicious hatemail: blehman646@gmail.com

To whomever drew my header: Awesome
Note: old header link here

For Wiisucks:
Hi! My name is Jack Klassen.! I'm a completely ordinary teenage boy from San Diego, California. My interests include soccer, surfing, writing poetry, and luge. I am homeschooled by my father who fought in the Korean War and was exposed to nerve gas. He is kind of crazy but I still love him. We got the Internet two years ago and I started making new friends on Yahoo! messenger. Surprisingly, most of these new friends were older men who wanted to have illegal, underage sex with me. Needless to say, I got a boner like a rocketship and cybersex quickly became my favorite thing in the entire world. Wait, did I say boner like a rocketship? I meant my vagina got as wet as Lake Titicaca. I started saving all of the hot chat sessions I was having with the Pakistanis, lesbians, child molesters and other monsters who were instant messaging me all day and all night, and I decided to put them up here on this website so you can see exactly how disgusting the entire human race is. Since then, I have been in a waterskiing accident that mangled my genitals beyond repair, been diagnosed with cerebral palsy, brain cancer, and Crohn's disease, learned to speak Urdu and French, covered my naked body in superglue, went to French lesbian camp, made a Hindu eat a roast beef sandwich out of my vagina, and ruined perfectly good cybersex for at least one hundred people. Use the menu above to find out more about me and start reading my sexy adventures,





Also, I make people from Pheonix Wright cry:


Also, also, sparkle:


Also, also, also, jiggles:


Also, also, also, also, Trent!


Alsox5, kitteh:


Also, X-mas Shake(a.k.a. itemforty is teh sex)
Gamer Profile
3DS friend code:
Steam: blehmeng
Battle:
PSN:
Mii:
Gamertag: blehmeng
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360 Friday Night Fights: Pre-Singles Awareness Day Edition
blehman | 11:17 AM on 02.13.2009 21 comments




Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand I'm back. Hosting, blogging, sexytime extraordinare me bringing you all the news I see fit to print aboot Canadian rebellions and Friday Night Fighting on the 360. After a brief stint of trying to be nice on a Friday and giving my roommate the TV and the 360 for once, and him not coming home that night because he was broke and decided to stay at school, I'm back on the sofa propped up with pillows, beer and an undecided spirit.

As you may have noticed, Zombutler did the blog last week. We'll be rotating it off, but I should still be playing next week. But next week is neither here nor now, so stop worrying about it and love the bomb.

SO, it's Friday once again. Singles Awareness Day is tomorrow, so we can go ahead and try to set up plans for tomorrow night while playing tonight. Meaning, while all the "lovers" (a.k.a. having to spend money to try and impress their significant other/whatever they could find enough to score) do their thing, we can play "drink teh alcohol and not be depressed about our current single status by having a support group of other single people drinking and killing things online together". Or DTAANBDAOCSSBHASGOOSPDAKTOT. At least that's what I plan to do. And before you ask, no, I'm not a cynic, I'm a realist.

AAAAANYWAY, enough sob stories, we'll just have to wait for some other time for the story where I was abducted off the street for fifteen years and then released for three days to get my revenge. We're not here to discuss that. Well, I'm not at least. I'm here to give YOU, yes you, the information needed to successfully join and play FNF with us, the people. Here's what you'll need to do if you've not played with us.

1. Be online at the desired time/designated time.
2. Send a message or wait for an invite.
3. To get an invite, leave, here or on the forums, your GT, what game you want to play, and when you'll be online.
4. Get in on it.



So, we don't really have much in the way of hosts this week, but here's what we got.

Left 4 Dead
I'll be hosting a game at about 7 Central, we'll go through the maps two or three times. Depending on interest of course. Gamertag: blehmeng

If anyone else wants to host a later/earlier game just leave it in the comments.

SSF2WWFHDBBQWTF

Haxan is generous enough to host this later on in the night.

Starting aboot 9 Est. Gamertag: haxan1

CastleCrashers?
Call of Duty 4?

sstryker 20 seemed to want to play them, too bad he left no gamertag or times. Still, just hop on and see who's playing, maybe someone will join you.

Shadowrun?
Crackdown?

If I find a cheap copy of it tonight, I'll hop in Shadowrun prior to starting a L4D game. Just for you j1mb0.

Worms?
Bomberman?
Sensual Massages?

ScottyG wants to know if anyone wants to play one of these with him sometime in the night. And no, I'm not kidding about the massage part. Hell, I may get it and be rubbed sensually into the night by a strange man across teh country.

Rockband 2?
Guitar Hero: World Tour?

Zombutler said he may be playing this tonight with RL friends, so remember to spam him with invites for not playing with us.

[Edit] For DJP3DR0, because he asked so nice and soft.

WHO? Gamertag DJP3DRO!
WHAT? Rock Band 2!
WHEN? 7PM!
WHERE? Xbox 360!
WHY? YOUR MOTHER.
HOW? No DLC required. Guitar and bass will most likely be taken up already, but feel free to stop in anyways if that's all you've got. I'll probably be having the four of us playing in a party that anyone can join and see what's taken and what isn't. Mics are HIGHLY PREFERRED but if for some reason you can't use one then I'll understand.

Hope I didn't submit this too late! (you did)

Forza 2?
Burnout: Paradise?

Yeah, not for me but you kids can race all you want. Edit: Grim will be hosting tonight at 9. Add him (GT: Warchiefgrim) if you want to play.

Questions, concerns, bomb threats? Call your mom, at my number. See you tonight kids.



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20 comments | showing # 1 to 20
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Senisan's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/13/2009 11:53
Senisan
This lady walks into the train, sits down next to me and she asks "Are you Single?" and I tell her " Claro que yo cingo!" LOL! ummm...anyways I'd like to get on some SFHD and Crackdown(haven't played that in so long)

GT:Senisan
pendelton21's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/13/2009 11:54
pendelton21
You know you can count me in.

Hell, I might even get drunk tonight, too!
aborto thefetus's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/13/2009 12:01
aborto thefetus
I'll be on early tonight, probably between 6 PM and 9 PM EST
Unfortunately I can't play any later then that.

HOWEVER, I will be available Saturday all night long. Hopefully my makeshift internet access doesn't crap out.
ScottyG's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/13/2009 12:04
ScottyG
Not Sensual Massage! Remote Massage, the game Entrager made. :)

I'd also be up for some Castle Crashers or Ikaruga. Basically multiplayer XBLA/XNA games. :)
BluDesign's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/13/2009 12:19
BluDesign
I am down for drunk Uno or drunk Bomberman.

And L4D.

I'll be there sometime this evening, but I have a previous engagement on Gears 2, so I don't know when.
Hoygeit's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/13/2009 12:35
Hoygeit
Should be on tonight. :)
Darren Nakamura's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/13/2009 12:38
Darren Nakamura
@ScottyG: I still need to get the "play a four player XBox Live game" on Worms. I might be on tonight. Gamertag: Dexter345
Kryptinite's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/13/2009 12:39
Kryptinite
i'll be on doing something! Burnout, L4D, Masturbation..I'll be there.
Tubatic's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/13/2009 12:53
Tubatic
Remote Massage? Friday Night Foreplay?


I wanna shoot some zombies tonight.
entrager's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/13/2009 12:54
entrager
When I'm done massaging everyone else, I'll probably play L4D.
Count Grishnack's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/13/2009 12:57
Count Grishnack
I will most surely be on at 10pm eastern. Possibly before.
entrager's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/13/2009 13:38
entrager
@scottyg
It's called Remote Masseuse.
DJP3DRO's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/13/2009 15:12
DJP3DRO
YO BLEHMAN ADD MY SHIT BRO
DJP3DRO's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/13/2009 15:27
DJP3DRO
thank you =D
MechaMonkey's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/13/2009 15:55
MechaMonkey
I'm probably in for some L4D.

GT: MechaMunkey
icarus's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/13/2009 16:00
icarus
I just got Castle Crashers, so if anyone is in the mood to play, send me an invite. I should be on around 8 EST. GT: EsqWired
EternalPersona's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/13/2009 16:51
EternalPersona
I''l be there for L4D at around 6 PM EST. Just drop me an invite.
EternalPersona's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/13/2009 18:23
EternalPersona
EDIT: Oops, I meant 6 PM Pacific. My Bad.
Maurice Tan's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/13/2009 18:24
Maurice Tan
L4D till 10pm and then massage to relax? Hmm!
Steel Squirrel's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/13/2009 21:51
Steel Squirrel
=(

I can't get to my high speed internets for Friday gayming because there is too much fucking snow up here. SON OF A BITCH.

I will be playing single player games all weekend... if the power doesn't go out again. Man... I could have really gone for a massage from a stranger on the internet too.
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